I miss my son so much even if he's just right here with me :(
By mtrguanlao
@mtrguanlao (5522)
Philippines
April 4, 2012 10:11pm CST
My son is already working and he seldom eats with us lately due to his work. He works at night and most of the time when he's here,he is just asleep. And when it's his day off,he doesn't want to mingle with us,he will just listen to music and plays with his electric guitar he bought. Whenever I talk to him,I have to ask him questions so he will talk. I miss my son so much. How I wish he could go back to his early age again so I can play and talk to him or bond with him for a long time. There was a time I wanted to learn how to play a guitar just to bond with him but he just told me that I have hard hands,waaa!!!
Honestly,my fingers were hurt,ouch,so I gave up,lol! There are times I tell him to go with us in a mall,but he will refuse 'cause he said his friends might say he's a mama's boy,oh my! I don't know why he's like that now,huhu!
If you're a parent to an adult,how do you handle your son/daughter? I envy those parents who are so close with their adult offsprings. I don't know if there is something wrong with me.
Honestly,my fingers were hurt,ouch,so I gave up,lol! There are times I tell him to go with us in a mall,but he will refuse 'cause he said his friends might say he's a mama's boy,oh my! I don't know why he's like that now,huhu!
If you're a parent to an adult,how do you handle your son/daughter? I envy those parents who are so close with their adult offsprings. I don't know if there is something wrong with me.1 person likes this
8 responses
@Inderjeetkaur (944)
• India
5 Apr 12
Hello mtr,
I can very well understand your situation and feelings. Around 5 years back when my brother started working in a private company my parents and I used to have the same feeling. He would leave the house at 9:15 am and would come back at 8:30 pm. He would then take dinner with us and within 20 minutes he would be in his room either watching tv or chatting with office friends and colleagues. We really missed being with him. But I guess it is normal and happens with every boy/girl.
When they start working somewhere, they spend almost 10 hours of a day outside their home and make many new friends. It is not that they get detached with their family members because of this, it's only that they get occupied with new atmosphere, new responsibilities, new friends, lots of dreams and tough competition. Give him some time I am sure he will learn how to balance his family and professional life. Don't worry every thing settles down with time, you just need to be with him whenever he needs your support.
1 person likes this
@mtrguanlao (5522)
• Philippines
7 Apr 12
@Inderjeetkaur..I think you are right about it. If my son is adjusting then I have to adjust too,now I understand more. How's your brother now?
By the way,am so sorry for my delayed reply.
@amigo..I'm sure parents miss you too!
@Cherish14 (2693)
• Philippines
5 Apr 12
awwww i am sure that you miss him a lot. i see that even here in the family and also other people.
in our case here, we are not close to our parents. i, myself, am not close to my parents ever since i was small, i had such a bad childhood that i don't ever wanna look back too.
people have different experiences and they all develop differently. maybe for now he is more comfortable being alone? i am like that and i am more happy and comfortable when i am with my friends. how old is your son?
1 person likes this
@Cherish14 (2693)
• Philippines
5 Apr 12
oh and you know what, i am happy to hear that you are also trying to learn how to play the guitar just to be close to him. he is one lucky son to have you as his parent.
1 person likes this
@mtrguanlao (5522)
• Philippines
5 Apr 12
Hi there cherish! I'm not sure if my son wants to be alone but I am sure that he likes to be with his friends more often than us,I understand that. He is now 21 yrs old Cherish,how I wish he is in his 7yrs and up age again.
Oh,I also learned how to play tekken in playstation just to bond with my son,and started to like "headbang music" too because of him,yay,hehe! He always teaches her 4 yr old sister how to do the head bang,I like seeing them both with that scene,so cute!
@Cherish14 (2693)
• Philippines
5 Apr 12
awww you're such a cool mom 
that is very good of you to be doing that for your son
yeah i think children are like that nowadays, but i know he will know better when he gets a little older and more mature
that is very good of you to be doing that for your son
yeah i think children are like that nowadays, but i know he will know better when he gets a little older and more mature 1 person likes this
@prospectboy (754)
• United States
9 Apr 12
Hello Teresa. I'm not a parent, but it sounds to me like your son is in that rebellious type of stage in his life. I have an 20 year old sister, and she is the same way towards me and my mom now. She prefers to be around her friends more, and she doesn't really communicate with us like she did when she was younger. I think everyone goes through that stage in their lives. There isn't anything wrong with you ma'am. As he gets older and matures even more, he will appreciate his family and open up to you more. Best wishes to you ma'am.
@mtrguanlao (5522)
• Philippines
10 Apr 12
Hello my good friend!
I think you are right about the rebellious stage in our lives and it so happened that my son is presently in that stage. Now I know how my parents felt when we spent more time with our friends that time. It's just that I wish my son could spend more time with us,I really miss him.
I think you are right about the rebellious stage in our lives and it so happened that my son is presently in that stage. Now I know how my parents felt when we spent more time with our friends that time. It's just that I wish my son could spend more time with us,I really miss him.
@bhonti (1246)
• Philippines
6 Apr 12
There is definitely nothing wrong with you. You are just behaving like any mother I know. Why not try to prepare a special dinner for the whole family. Make sure to do it in a time when all the members are free, no work, studies, even no hanging out with friends. Is the best time to bond, just eat while talking on things that is happening on each other. Try to set the date in advance so that your son can have more time to prepare and clear up his schedule.
1 person likes this
@mtrguanlao (5522)
• Philippines
7 Apr 12
One thing I noticed with my son is we have to ask him questions first before he talks and he answers so short,either yes or no,oh my! And if we still keep on asking him,he sometimes gets irritated. His work is at night so we seldom have him during breakfast and lunch. And if it's his day off,he just rest at home,but I like it too 'cause there are some who spends their day offs with friends but my son just stays at home.
@WakeUpKitty (8694)
• Netherlands
5 Apr 12
Tell your son you miss spending time with him. I don't think doing what he likes will make a bond. You are close or you are not. There is a reason why he is not there since he is working. There will also be a time he will start his own life, have his own house. That is normal, that is why we raise kids to make it possible for them to live their own lives. Not to stay with you forever.
You better go find out what you like to do with yourself, what kind of goals you have for you.
I think your son is tired, he has an other life scedule as you have, there is nothing wrong with you, you two are just not sharing the same life style anymore.
1 person likes this
@mtrguanlao (5522)
• Philippines
7 Apr 12
I've always been telling him that we miss him and that he should spend some time with us but I do understand that he has works to do and he needs to rest whenever he's at home. It's just,I miss the old him that used to tell some stories with us and join us at our living room. I don't know,I know you are right that he has a new lifestyle now and I have to accept it.
@rewardsinlife (1132)
• United States
5 Apr 12
Definately nothing wrong with you. I am not a parent, but a daughter of a mother who does not have a good relationship with her son at all. My brother(her son), almost doesn't exist at this house other than to eat and sleep. When he is here, he is in his room, and we never see him. Your son might grow out of it, he might not. My brother is 22, and been acting this was since he was a teen.
1 person likes this
@mtrguanlao (5522)
• Philippines
7 Apr 12
My son was like that when he had a job so I guess I just have to understand him and adjust to it. It's just that I am missing our old days when he's always with us.
@shibham (16977)
• India
5 Apr 12
Hi amiga...
Dont cry a lot at least for crystal's sake.
Well, i can understand your situation. I think it is better to get attached with his music. I mean you can challenge him asking to play your favorite songs on his guitar. you may evaluate him by asking the cording. So, just try to be a good listener to his music by your choice and later slowly try to express how much you are missing him.
have a nice time and now smile.
@mtrguanlao (5522)
• Philippines
5 Apr 12
Hello amigo!
That's a good suggestion amigo,will try to ask him that,but you know,he loves "headbang musics",yay! I'm trying to make him spend some time with us,even if it's just for an hour or so,I know he's busy now because of his work but he still have some day offs,so that's my time to make him stay with us and have some bonding. But I will not force my son to do so,I just want him to feel that we love him so much.
Will try to reply to your discussion tomorrow amigo,it's late night here already,have a great night amigo.
That's a good suggestion amigo,will try to ask him that,but you know,he loves "headbang musics",yay! I'm trying to make him spend some time with us,even if it's just for an hour or so,I know he's busy now because of his work but he still have some day offs,so that's my time to make him stay with us and have some bonding. But I will not force my son to do so,I just want him to feel that we love him so much.
Will try to reply to your discussion tomorrow amigo,it's late night here already,have a great night amigo.
@deodavid (4150)
• Philippines
5 Apr 12
Hey there mtrguanlao,
well i think there is nothing wrong with who you are or you in particular, maybe your son is just really trying to act more like a man, trying to be more distant doesn't mean he doesn't love you anymore, maybe he is just tired of work and that he wants to just relax and not think of anything else. don't worry about it he'll come to his senses.
@mtrguanlao (5522)
• Philippines
5 Apr 12
Yeah,he doesn't have more time to mingle with us these days because of his work. But sometimes he has more time with his friends than us,but I do understand it,it's his way to unwind. Thanks for saying that there is nothing wrong with me.
