My Dad gave away my hand ...! :p

hi di I have my own hands and no one gave mine to anyone The same for my wife - ours was a love marriage and there was not many customs and traditions that we followed. Okay, seriously, I think that is more out of some silly tradition and will pass away with time. Today, there are many parents who dont do this... though in the Hindu religion this is one of the major tasks a person has to do in his life - Kanyadaan as it is called (gifting the daughter). I object and oppose this stale and unhealthy custom though as we are all humans and not items that can be gifted...

According to our culture men are given more importance as compared to women. In most of such cultural activities men play an active role. I doesn't mean that women are not given equal rights. Our fore-fathers follows the same activities. We people just copy it and act the same. According to me there is no perfect answer to me. If you need an perfect answer you must go to the past

Hey...I never thought of that!! Though I love my mom and dad, I've always been close to my dad since the time I remember. My mom did take care of my needs when I was little but then she changed when I was older....and does nag quite a bit and say mean things. As is the custom, my dad gave away my hand. Lol...maybe they intended dads to do the dirty work...no parent is really glad to give their child away even as they are hoping that she will have a good life.

Nice avatar didi.... Well, i have to ask my dad why he did the same at time of my sister's wedding. I think that is the only one moment to cherish his emotions of being a dad. Have a nice time.

Jane beti, giving way hands' is known as 'kanyadan' here, it is done by parents usually, when my daughter got married in 1985, this was done by my brother and his wife, because i was bedridden due to the hipbone fracture.. In the marriage of my niece recently, it was done by me and maa.See the picture Blessings always

Maybe it has something to do with that fact that they always say that girls are closer to their dads then their mothers. You know, the daddy's girl thing. I get your point and I understand it. But the question should be really, why doesn't the mother and the father give the girl away at their wedding. Think about that one for a bit.

Hi Jai! I think it should be both the parents who give hand of their daughter on the occasion of wedding. In our culture, the ritual is performed by both the parents (am not exactly aware about your rituals).

Hi Jai, I can't even understand too why is it our dad really have to take our hand on our own wedding. I just thought maybe because we are used to that men are always our escort in any special events like our 18th birthdays or debut and in our prom. And maybe also just a respect to our dads who is the head of the family he is the one who will leave behind us to the man we love.

As I said in my comment: One of the reasons, I know, why the father is given the task to give the hand of his daughter away in marriage is because the father is the head of the family, protector of his property and those he had under his care and also their provider. That's his status. The passing of his daughter's hand in marriage to the guy is a symbol-of-sorts just the same as passing his responsibility, towards his daughter (all those things I've mentioned above), to the guy. The woman, then, will become the responsibility of the guy and not anymore a part of her previous family--(this has got to do why the wedding gown is white. But that's another story). In other words, the one who feeds, give shelter and take care of the woman now is the guy and his family. That's another reason why it's the woman that should be moving in with the guy. Weddings do have a lot of symbols and sometimes it's a pain to just know the reason behind them all, so the reason for my ignorance to some parts of it, to which I apologize.

Hi jaiho: I actually agree with you and I share your same point of view on this issue. The only reason things are like that is for cultural reasons where we think that parents are the "king" of the family and the one who has the most power in the house and as the owner of his daughters he is the one who gives them to the future husband. It doesn't make any sense in our modern way of thinking. But it would be better if both parents take place in this special ceremony. ALVARO

Nice new profile picture jaiho! Well, for me , maybe it's because the father is considered the head of the family. Thus, it is him who have the final say of whether you will be married to your guy or not, hence when wedding day comes, he is the one who will give you away. See, i went back to your old discussions.

Hello dear jai! Hmmm..it never came to my mind that question,lol! I think the reason for that is because we are going to be given to a man of our lives so that's why a man who is our father has the right to give it since he is also a man...is there a connection,oh my,lol!

hello jai. Nice question to us my lotter's. I noticed that already because when i got married my father is the who gave my hand.You know my friend.it is really our belief or should i say our tradition so its ok.Yes it is there already that our mom sacrifices her life for us, but if we are already growing our dad has big part of it.Has a vital role.As they said they are our protector.anyway that's hows life occurred.

Interesting. I never thought about this until I read this discussion, so thanks, I guess?? Haha. Anyway, like a few here said, I think both parents have the right to give away their child's hand in marriage at the wedding ceremony. Although if the mother doesn't mind that only the father do so, then it's okay too.

Its a part of tradition.When you are born whose name or the surname do you carry?Its your dads. For admission to schhol and college its again your dads name that you bear. Your dad provides you for everything,right from your childhood upto your marriage.Yes, its really your mother who has borneyou in her womb and given birth to you and also brought you up, but even she bears your dads name.So there is nothing wrong when your dad gives you away at the time of marriage.

hi jai, I prefer to gave away my whole body cause I don't want to be a one handed woman I doubt if my dad will just give my hand Well because of this tradition and beliefs that MALE domination LOL......... happy mylotting hugs

no dad , no me !