Do I Really Need To Feel Guilty?
By keshlois143
@keshlois143 (713)
Philippines
April 11, 2012 10:46pm CST
I am a working mother and I just cannot help but grieve because I cannot leave my work to babysit my kid since we do not have a helper and his dad needs to attend to an important seminar. I really feel so bad. Actually, guilt is what I have here inside me. I have only one kid yet it seemed too hard already to give him enough attention and care. I had a hard times and effort in asking others even a relative to take care of him. Do I really need to feel this way? I have been planning to resign but my proposal for resignation is not yet approved.
8 responses
@dazzledlady (1618)
• Philippines
12 Apr 12
I think it is fairly normal for you to feel guilty. After all, it is your responsibility as a parent to take care of your child. Personally, I think it is a good idea for you to resign if your husband is capable of supporting your family's needs financially. It is best to be there for your child especially on his formative years. To guide him in every steps, to make sure he grows up to be a great man.
@keshlois143 (713)
• Philippines
12 Apr 12
Hi dazzlelady! I am touched with your idea and suggestion. Thank you very much. Well, my husband's earning is not fixed neither i can say that it is stable. For now, the earnings are still fine but I am not sure in the future. By the way, my kid is three(3) years old. Is that still belong to a formative years?
@dazzledlady (1618)
• Philippines
12 Apr 12
Yes it is still an early stage in a child's formative years. This time you will be able to help him develop his own character, the right and wrong, the adult role model so than when adolescent stage comes and peer pressure sets in to influence your child you will worry less. Because you now know your son better and instill in him what it takes to be a good man. He is most likely be least tempted to try the bad things or you will detect early if something is not right in your son's life to be able to intervene if it is needed. I does not mean that you have to spoil your son, it is just good to know him inside and out as a parent.
@cutepenguin (6431)
• Canada
12 Apr 12
It's hard not to feel guilty. I try to remember that my husband doesn't wander around feeling guilty about going to work, because he knows we need his income. Well, we need my income too, and it's just hard to balance all the things we need to do for our family.
@keshlois143 (713)
• Philippines
14 Apr 12
That is the sad thing having a family. Balance is a difficult training to us. You are right and I just feel the same feelings that other working mothers have in their heart.
@shingshing (119)
• Philippines
12 Apr 12
For me, you don't have to feel guilty because you are working also for your kid. For sure you have a day off from your work, you should spend that day and all your free time with your kid. Where are you by the way? I bet you are far from me because if you are near, I will take care of your kid. Oh, before I forgot, when your resignation gets approval and you want to have an extra income, try online jobs like the rest of us do. Relax, you're a good mother.
@keshlois143 (713)
• Philippines
12 Apr 12
Thanks shing2! Yes, i know there are alternative works online. Thanks too for the offer to take care of my kid..jeje..
@keshlois143 (713)
• Philippines
14 Apr 12
I do hope, too. Online can be a good alternative but the problem with me is that I am sociable folk that I always wanted a personal interaction. I am not really fond of virtual socialization or having an interaction through the internet. I do not want staying at home whole day every day..
@keshlois143 (713)
• Philippines
12 Apr 12
That must be, t_zhanji. But I also have some commitment with my work today that demands me to stay on duty. That is why quitting is my solution but I want it to be smooth.So, I am just waiting for the approval of my resignation.
@honest_efforts100 (1607)
• India
27 Jul 12
It can be so hard on a mother when she wants to be there for her baby and yet she can not. Mothers usually feel guilty about living there babies with other people regardless of the relationship. This is because of they feel that they need to give their children the best. Guilty is therefore a normal emotion for all mothers when it comes to their children.
@shylade (3132)
• Philippines
13 Apr 12
i am a working mom too and that is what we are likely to go through. like, i aonly ahve one son who is 21 months. i really feel guilty too that i was not able to take care of him during his early years for still need to go to work and help with our financial needs.
i am also thinking of resigning but life is so tough nowadays and i can't stand seeing my son with no food to eat. i want to give him the best in this world so we are working hard. i want to be a stay at home mom that is why as early as now i am thinking of ways how can i do that. finding a homebased job is one of the option but i cannot risk my current work for now. i know God has a better paln so i will wait this it is time.
goodluck to us mommy!
@Kojigirl (188)
•
13 Apr 12
I'm past fifty, and I don't remember a time when my mother didn't work. Because she was so busy, we kids learned to cook, do our laundry, keep the house tidy, etc. Every mother works, few of them can afford to stay home and work there. Guilt is what all mothers feel, regardless of what they do or if they're home. Your little one is growing up in a world where most women work or will work at some time in their lives. He will get through it, same as we all have. Think of all the kids who had mothers working during the War, they came through it okay, too.
No one ever said being a parent was easy, unless it was someone who didn't have kids. You're going to be fine, so will your son. This is what life is, a long list of things we have to do that never gets any shorter. Hang in there, you'll survive. Keep smiling, it will make your enemies worry.
