Mother's Day guilt

Wow! May I say that you seem to have some odd people in your family. I hope she gets over it. People sure can be funny about things.

Hello! I think it is a common attitude or behavior of moms who are living alone. Even my mother is like that too, but knowing their situation helps me understand them. People at this stage, we call the latency stage usually feels insecure and most of them become depressed. They need more attention so they tend to talk and talk and make their children feel guilty. Maybe you just have to explain to her that you have your own family to care for and spend time during special occasions. A short phone call would make her feel that you are concern of her once in a while. Treating her out to a lunch or dinner with your kids if you are in the mood would make her happy too. It is annoying sometimes but your mother is still your mother and show her that she is still important to you while you can. Good Luck!

JAJA, I had to laugh at this especially that you had to hang up on her. My mom lives with me and has for about 4 years now. Before that she lived alone and I was the only one of her 5 kids that ever went to check on her and took her out. My mom is a very difficult woman, she is very unhappy and bitter and was a bad mom too. Now having her here makes a lot of stress for me in my relationship and with my kids because she is everywhere and involved in everything. She is always critiquing and complaining and says that I only remember the bad things she did. I think if she was nicer then I would probably be more positive to her, but the fact that she is still such a difficult and mean woman only makes me think of all the bad things she did when we were small. I guess the moral of my story is....that at least you can be thankful your mom is far away from you and not in the very next room. Don't get me wrong, I love my mom. But she doesn't make it easy.

Hello, I would say just let it go. It sounds like she does not have a lot friends... you are all grown up now and have lives of your own. It also sound she is very selfish and wants all the attention when you have your own families now. I think it was very sweet for her birthday you gave her a vacation... she is is spoiled by both of you and I feel she is taking advantage of both you which is not fair. She may be also feeling lonely but that is not your fault but hers. I do not know how old she is and if she is divorced or widowed etc... Thanks and Have a great Mothers Day weekend! Do not let mother spoild your day! You deserves your day too! Thanks Unique16

wow thats has to be frusterating at least you did something for her birthday she will have to understand you cant just drop everything to see her on mothers day when you have a bunch of other things going on.

I'd like to suggest that you give her the best Mothers Day gift you've ever given her; a letter telling her very honestly how you feel about the dysfunctional game she's playing. Tell her that the guilt game is back firing on her. The mind game she's playing make you and your sister want to spend LESS time with her...instead of more. Tell her that you REFUSE to participate in this game with her in the future because it's important to you that you have a quality relationship with her that does NOT include guilt. Set your boundries and insist on having a relationship with her on your terms. If she's uncooperate she needs to understand that you will make NO effort to be a good daughter in the future. I wish you the best with this situation. Sincerely, Sherrybelle

the quilt is a really sweet but i am sorry that you have to live with a family of grumps. i think Mothers day is somewhat over rated and that you should do something nice for your mom every day. my mom takes mother's day to an extreme. once she complained that i bought her a cheap gift!

I'm sorry that you're angry with your mom. I think she is probably lonely and misses you , that's all, I know that's how I feel when my kids don't even phone me. I talk to my parents a lot more than them , these days.

I have kind of the same type of mother... and I still live with her because I still have to earn some money to move out (I'm 22). When it's about others' interests, it's just little things, but when it's about her, if I contradict her, tell her she's wrong or want to spend my time with other stuff that she planned, I'm the worst daughter in the world... sigh... I feel for you.