Do you want to know everything?
By savypat
@savypat (20216)
United States
April 21, 2012 12:49pm CST
I am one of those people who likes to know as much as I can. But if you are like that you must pay the price. The cost of knowledge is acceptance, non judgemental
acceptance of what you discover. If you cannot do this the cost can be terrible.
Information is generally in the past, there is nothing you can do to change this.
Nor should you try. When I learn something new about a friend, I need to accept that. The person has not changed, they are the same as they were before I knew
what I know now. My friend has terrible ideas about other people. I didn't know that, she has always accepted me and never showed that side of herself to me. But now that I know this and am against this attitude I have to decied to keep her as a friend or not. So I thought a lot about this and I made up my mind that we all have good and bad sides, my friend is my friend because of her good side and I will accept her unpleasent side as a part of her and not judge her. After all I do not
know what has made her this way but I find that I don't need to know this. I'll just enjoy the parts of her I have always known. Can you do this?
2 people like this
10 responses
@megamatt (14292)
• United States
22 Apr 12
I think that while I am very curious, I will admit that there are just some things that are out there, that I don't really want to know. I really think that there are things that I am going to fear the answers from. Many mysteries exist in life and if one thinks about them too much, they are not really going to have all that great of a time piecing that together.
Sometimes when you dig a little too deep, you find things that change your entire perception of life. And that perception is not really changed right for the better. I guess that is a lesson to really mind your business and really not delve too deeply into things, because you might not like the results of what you are trying to find.
2 people like this
@Lore2009 (7378)
• United States
22 Apr 12
I'd like to believe that knowelge is the power to acceptance but there are many times that I feel more pain in knowing things, rather the opposite. I think I am pretty good at keeping an open mind about others and be non judgmental most of the time, but I am also human so there are times when this is difficult. I am learning to realize the good and bad in people and enjoy the good as much as I can.
@Pose123 (21635)
• Canada
21 Apr 12
Hi savypat, yes this is something that I can do, but I didn't always think that way. I once saw people as good and bad, until I realized that it was I, who was deciding what was good and what was bad. Now I know that people are just different like me. Sometimes when we are very young we find it hard to believe that some people won't like us, but we soon learn that we are not all meant to be best friends. Naturally, our friends will be those with whom we have the most in common, but there will always be things about which we don't agree. We must accept people for who they are and hope they will do the same for us. Blessings.
2 people like this
@_sketch_ (5742)
• United States
21 Apr 12
Maybe now that you see this side of your friend, you can try to help her see it from your point of view. Sometimes people don't really realize that they are thinking or acting in a negative way. It's all about point of view. We judge some people more harshly than others, sometimes leaving a lot more leeway for ourselves. Society tells us that things are supposed to be a certain way, but in real life, things are not perfect; people are not perfect, and so this can make us feel negativity towards those "breaking the rules." It doesn't mean that your friend is bad or anything. That's why you decided to still be her friend because you realize that she is good, even though she does have her flaws.
Anyways, you are right. If we are going to pursue the truth, we have to be prepared to find something that we might not like. You can't un-know something. This is where we get our sayings, "The truth- you can't handle the truth." and, "What a person doesn't know can't hurt them." The truth can be very harsh, but I highly value it. Even though the truth can hurt, it can heal if only we can accept it.
2 people like this
@GemmaR (8517)
•
21 Apr 12
I know that it isn't always possible to know everything that there is to know, but I am the kind of person who likes to know as much as I possibly can. I have almost finishing studying for a degree and during the past three years I have learned how to find out whatever information I want, and how to put that information to good use. I am glad that I took the time to invest in my education and I hope that I am going to be able to take my education even further at some point in the future when I can afford to do so.
2 people like this
@JenInTN (27514)
• United States
21 Apr 12
I would like to think I could. I am certainly one that loves to learn. I am very open to things and not one to judge at all. I actually get a little mad when I hear judgement placed by others. I do say what I think so there might be an issue with the friend and me from their side more than from mine..LOL.
2 people like this
@ellie333 (21016)
•
22 Apr 12
Hi Pat, If only more people in the world would learn to accept everybody for who they are good and bad the world would be a lot happier a place to live in. We are all different and non of us perfect. I think the only time I would severe a friendship is if they was a betrayal involved like having an affair with my partner or the person bought me down due to constant negatively and in the latter case I wouldn't un friend I would just choose not to be around them often and gradually drift away. Huggles. Ellie :D
1 person likes this
@much2say (55604)
• Los Angeles, California
22 Apr 12
It's nice to know all you can about a person. I welcome whatever a friend chooses to tell me - but I don't have to know "everything". If they happen to give me more information than I really needed to hear, I assume it is because they feel I can be trusted - that's a good thing, I think. That being said, if they take advantage of my ears and overload me about it, I will get annoyed!
1 person likes this
@inertia4 (27960)
• United States
25 Apr 12
Lots of people have two or more sides to them. You do have to accept them for who they are. If she ever did anything or said anything to you personally, then I could see stopping the friendship. Maybe she has good reason for feeling like she does about other people. But I am also one of those people that have the need to know everything. I love to know everything. And I am also the kind of person that when I meet someone, I have a tendency to see the negative before the positive. That way I can better assess the person and know if I will accept them as my friend. I guess I live with a high standard for myself.
@superbadx (484)
• Malaysia
22 Apr 12
Same here. I like to know everything so that when people talking i would actually umderstand them and get in the conversation. The best of all, i like to know things my own way. Like if it's about things i studies for example, i like to do an experiment in science or check out the place where the history happens rather than listening my teachers talking. It makes me more understand of what i'm trying to know and make me easier to remember those things. The same with social life which i usually just overheard the conversation my friends are talking rather than asking them myself. That's why most of my friends always ask me about somethig they don't know thinking that i know everyhing and the solution of everything.
1 person likes this