" Think Like A Man"? No thanks. ( a mini rant. )

No one should have to change for anyone. I knew I found the right one when he took me for who I was, and I took him for who he was. If we are changing for the "right" person, then clearly we have not found the right person. True we can LEARN (if someone else's influence makes someone realize that smoking is hurting them and THEY WANT TO QUIT SMOKING) but if the smoker doesn't want to quit, deep down for example, nothing's going to stop them from smoking.

I don't think a man or a woman should have to change for anyone else but themselves. If they want to change the way they live, then it is fine. But no one should have to change for another just to help the 'fall in love' process.

I don't want a man I have to change. If he's a bad guy, he'll never get the chance to show me anything different. I don't go for craft projects. If he can't change himself into a good guy to better his own life, then I don't know what would keep him good when a woman finally comes along. I haven't read the book or seen the movie. But both seem to be hits.

Speaking as a man... I think you may have taken what he said too far. I have changed in relationships I've had, but not to "win" her. The changes I feel he may be talking about are ones that happen when one goes from having to be self-reliantly independent to feeling safe about being unguarded and however much somewhat dependent upon the one they have fallen for. Giving up hanging out all night every Friday with the guys for going to a new place with his love or spending countless hours of overtime on the job for dinner with her are significant changes. But all voluntary. When a guy feels he will not be betrayed by the woman he is with, he softens a bit. He senses it's ok to be less aggressive, less hard shelled, less competitive. It's a good thing. But that's what I think.

I don't think it has anything to do with changing really. I think that is a man, or woman for that better meets the right person, it is like an instant meeting of the minds. They meld perfectly. They automatically have an unspoken respect for one another. I do not consider that changing. I think that is becoming one. Most people do not meet their true partner and thats why they have to conform to some degree. Just because they have some things in common does not mean they belong together. When it's right it' right. There is no explanation there is no mystery. It just is. I have never changed for anyone and don't plan on doing it ever. And T has never changed for anyone either and she will never change either. But we fit together. A perfect match. Like you and your guy. We happen to be lucky at this point in our lives. Others aren't.

No person should have to pretend to be someone they are not just to get someone to fall for them if that is the case then they will eventually get tired of acting like someone they are not and there true person will come out and surprise the other person and they may not like the true person. I say be who you are and if you are not like for that then find someone who does except you for who you are.

Prior to this discussion, I hadn't heard of the book or movie, but I'm opposed to its ideas. I don't think a man should have to change for a woman, nor a woman change for a man. If a man were to make a positive change in his life because of me, what happens when I'm not a good enough reason anymore? He'd go back to his old ways. Don't you think? On top of that, I don't want to be with a man because of who he is when he's around me; I want to be with him because of who he truly is. I want to be with someone who likewise appreciates me for who I am, not who I turned into because of them. My husband and I appreciate each other for who we are. No change necessary!

I personally think that people don't change for love. They change because they want to.

The movie was quite famous, it had been in the top films for weeks- haven't seen it though but it looks good and funny. It think it would be nice if a man changed for me, truly changed..then you'd do something good for the community, if a man was a bad guy before.

Hello Sarah, I don't know the book neither the film, but perhaps the film come here in the next future. I think a person is able to change internally. It is a process which happens in our soul. I think angry people could change to lovely one. It is possible to change for better. But, we shouldn't improve our character, only thinking to get the right woman. I think it would have a utilitarian thinking.