Our neighbours are fighting again

@Porcospino (31366)
Denmark
April 30, 2012 1:53pm CST
My husband and I live in a semi detached house and the walls between our house the the neighhour's house are really thin. We can hear when they set the table, close a door, cough or talk. At the moment they are screaming at eachother and we can hear every single word that they say. It is really none of our business, and we try to focus on the movie that we are watching, but we automatically hear every word they say, and they keep slamming the doors. I am sure that they can hear us, too especially when we have a argument and raise our voices or when our dog is barking. Can you hear the things that your neighbours say and do? Does your neighours' noise (loud music etc) bother you?
6 people like this
16 responses
@bjc66bjc (6730)
• United States
30 Apr 12
I know that I live around other people and people will br people. But for the last couple of years I will just this... I have lived in the same location for 22 years and the police have been there more in the last 2 years than the entire 22 years I've lived there... Some of you know why, but its a real nightmare...having to deal with...
2 people like this
@sid556 (30959)
• United States
30 Apr 12
I can only imagine! and I'm so grateful that "imagine" is all I have to do.
1 person likes this
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
1 May 12
That sounds terrible. Like sid said I can only imagine what it is like to live there. My island sounds very peaceful compared to that. We have crime here, but it is not like the big cities. In the past I have lived in areas where I didn't feel safe, but today I don't have to worry about most of those things, because my island is relatively peaceful.
@bjc66bjc (6730)
• United States
1 May 12
hi thanks for responding, but its not that I don't feel safe,but it the fact that others are just so loud that it tends to disrupt others... Other than their disruption, its a very safe comminity and I am very happy to live here...
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 12
Oh yes, we can hear our neighbors as well. With the boom in the population, more houses are going up, but they are being placed closer and closer together to fit some more in. Have you thought of putting a fence between the two to kind of block out some of the sound? If this is not possible, maybe you need to install some 'sound' insulation tiles, or foam on your side to help damper the sound coming in and out.
2 people like this
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
30 Apr 12
Yes, I have thought about blocking out the sound in some way, I am not really sure how to do it or what it would cost, but it would be nice to find a way to block out the sound. That way it would be easier for us to live our individual lives without hearing every single sound from eachother. Actually I was a bit surpriced when I discovered how thin the walls are, I didn't expect that, but our house is old and maybe they didn't think much about those things when the house was built. I would love to buy the other side of the house and use it as an art gallery, but that is just a dream, we don't have that kind of money
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 12
That is a good dream! Till then, if you want a cheap alternative you can buy foam egg crates. (These are usually used for music sound booths). I get them free in my music stuff and have made my own little sound proof area in my closet for recording music. I think you could buy or have them donated by a store. Just tack or push them into the wall.
1 person likes this
@cher913 (25782)
• Canada
30 Apr 12
we live in a townhouse condo so we have neighbours on either side. one side is an older lady who is quite quiet (she must be in her mid 70s) and on the other side, we have a young, unmarried couple who live together. we can sometimes here their dog barking and once in a while hear them walking up the stairs but thats about it.
2 people like this
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
30 Apr 12
It is a good thing that your neighbours' noise don't bother you that much. Your response reminded me of the time when I lived in a townhouse condo with my parents. Our neighbour often played really loud music. He usually got home around 4 a.m. and he immediately started playing really loud music. We talked to him many times and even called the police when he refused to turn down the volume, but that didn't really change much.
1 person likes this
1 May 12
talk to your city hall bylaw department and explain issue and possible resolutions
1 person likes this
• United States
30 Apr 12
I can't imagine hearing every lil thing my neighbors say and do. I can hear them sometimes if they are outside and I have no tv on or a door open. The noises that bother me are like when the one neighbor used to take his dogs out when he got home at 2-3am. Then ya got another that used to have alot of partying tenants for a time that was something to wake up to tend to a sick child and you can hear them playing foot ball in the road.
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
1 May 12
The neighbour that took his dogs out at 2-3 a.m. must have been pretty annoying. At that time you just want to sleep. When I was still living with my parents we had a neighbour who got home at 4 a.m. and when he got home he turned on the music. He played loud music at that time of the night and it was driving us crazy. We talked to him many times, but it didn't help much. Partying tenants that sounds bad, too. Fortuneately we only experience that in July when there a music festival on my island.
@GemmaR (8517)
30 Apr 12
I am in the same position with you in our house. We are also in a semi detached house and our walls are thin which means that we can hear literally anything that they say. They argue a lot, and we sometimes feel a little bit uncomfortable listening to them because we're not sure that they know how much they can hear. I once heard them talking about us saying that we're bad neighbours, so the next time that they ask us for some help with their garden or looking after their children we shall be saying no, because we know exactly what they think about us as a family.
2 people like this
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
1 May 12
That sounds just like our house. We also feel a little uncomfortable when we listen their arguments. It is really none of our business, but we hear everything simply because the walls are so thin. I don't know if they know that we can hear everything, I guess they know, because I am pretty sure that they can hear us, too. Maybe they don't really care or maybe they forget that we can hear them when they start argueing. I understand why you have decided to say no to your neigbours next time they ask for help, it doesn't seem tempting to help people who say bad things about you. Some time ago we had a visitor who asked in a very loud voice: "So what do you think about the neighbours?" We didn't want to answer that question, because we knew that they would hear every word we said.
@kdnater (135)
• India
1 May 12
It is a usual thing to every one . But it is not so for me , some time my neighbours goes out of control and it happens .
1 person likes this
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
14 May 12
Yes, many people experience the same thing. I had the same problem when I lived in an apartment in the past. Our current neighbours seem to argue a lot, they are often screaming at eachother.
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
1 May 12
Hmmm.. Our home is a quiet one, we live in the city but are lucky enough to be located where trees still grow and homes are not built on tiny dog houses. However, we are not so lucky with the neighbors we have. The neighbor that's located a little bit close to the area where my room is has a son, daughter, and a grandson living with her. The son (when he's drunk) goes bezerk and a single comment from the grandson (who is around 20's) would send him screaming his head off and throwing things that would really sound traumatic since we live in a quiet place. I could hear his screams and them stopping him with all their might and the swearing just doesn't end. Though this doesn't happen often (about once every 2-3 months) it really sends shivers through my spine because I'm not used to it. These days, whenever drama comes to their household again, I simply turn on my speakers at its loudest so that they would realize that I'm annoyed with them. This tiny little village (I call it village because our community here in this area is only composed of around 20 houses but this is still close to the city center) is quiet but any commotion could be heard. I think your neighbors (like mine) knows that you can hear them. But I guess their tempers just get the most of them and they cannot control themselves. Another incident when I was with my partner in Singapore was that their homes there were also located on a quiet area. The buildings were high and a lot of people live per floor. Our flat was located on the corner and we only have one neighbor beside our flat. They would open their windows in the morning and start fighting. Every single day the same. I don't know the language well so when I asked my partner (who understood them) what they're fighting about, he'd often smile and tell me that they're fighting because the wife complains that the husband keeps on taking a shower. She claims that their water bill is already very high because he needs to take a bath every day. Have a great MyLot experience ahead!
1 person likes this
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
2 May 12
Your neighbours sounds very annoying. Turning up the volume is probably the best solution in that situation. It is not nice to be forced to listen to people who are screaming and throwing things around. In a quiet area we notice the noise even more. I think that our neighnours know that we can hear them, but I think that they forget it when they get angry. I was surpriced when I heard them the first time because I thought that the walls were relatively soundproof, but that is definately not the case. We can hear almost everything. Thr incident from Singapore made me laugh. It is funny that the wife critizes him for taking a bath every day, but maybe she prefers a bad smelling husband
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
30 Apr 12
hi Porcospino no my neighbors are pretty quiet except fot the one man next door who has cancer of the throast as he has a gurgling sound when he coughs . He is also my tablemate and when He starts to clear the stuff out of his throat he coughs up this y ellow crap into kleenex and wheezes and tu rns pu rple it turns my stomachl It an ugly sound and an ugly site. I wish he would do this at another time besides at meals..I am not unsympathetic but this sight mixed with food upsets my stomach.Our rooms are fairly soundproofed here at Gold Crest
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
1 May 12
I understand who you feel about your tablemate. That would upset my stomach, too. I am sure that he doesn't do it to bother you, but it is still an ugly sight, and it would make it hard to enjoy my food if I were in your situation. It is great that your rooms are soundproofed. I wish it was like that in our house. One mylotter gave me an idea, and we will try to do something to block out the sound. I don't like to listen to their arguments, and they seem to argue very often. Sometimes it is the parents and sometimes it is the parents and the teenage daughter.
@lampar (7584)
• United States
11 Jun 12
I can't hear what my neighbors are saying unless they are having an argument by shouting out loud at each other, the wall between us are sound proof to a certain degree that normal conversations between people inside the house are normally blocked out from the outside ears. I can only hear occasional dog barking from my neighbor home, or when they turn on their home stereo volumn set to the max. Other than that, i hardly know much of the personal secret my neighbors have in the passed years. It is good in a way that i don't have to hear anything and everything come out from my neighbors house no matter i like it or not.
1 person likes this
@fannitia (2167)
• Bulgaria
30 Apr 12
Yes, I can here my neighbours, I have an apartment in a five storey building. I here the steps of the neighbour who lives on top of me, he's a big man. Sometimes I even can here his little Pekinese dogs, the knocking of their claws on the cement floor of the corridor. It's the same with the neighbours next to me. They have a little girl and her mother often is yelling at her. Sometimes the kid have guests and they are screaming loudly. But these sounds doesn't bother me too much, thanks God.
1 person likes this
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
1 May 12
It is a good thing that the sounds don't bother you much. Your description of the place where you live reminded me of one of the apartments where I used to live. The girl who lived on top of us always wore high heels and her and her friends made a lot of noise. My ex-boyfriend and I used to joke about it, and we agreed that she probably kept an elephant as a pet and had decided to teach it to dance. She was very noisy and we were very happy when we got another apartment. Our new apartment was on the top floor, and it was much more quiet.
1 May 12
Hi porcospino! This is really funny and I can understand how you exactly feel about it.We can hear the noise of our neighbor only when they shouted or fight! But not when they have a normal conversation as we are separated by walls. I cannot imagine living in a place wherein every conversations we make can be heard by others.
1 person likes this
@samson1 (738)
• Jamaica
30 Apr 12
I suppose if you can hear the sound your neighbors' make from within your house, then they can hear sounds that originates from your house as well. That's a part of being neighborly; sharing on the joint sounds that are made collectively! On a different note, of course at certain times of day, if the music is too loud, then one can speak to the neighbor with a view to get the matter addressed, and vise versa. The idea is that with mutual respect, any issue can be resloved. Not every neighbor will be accommodative to each other; depending on a number of factors. However, one should strive to be as accommodative as possible, as both you and the neighbors will need to be neighborly as a matter or protocol.
1 person likes this
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
1 May 12
I think that is true, they can probably hear the sounds from our house as well. We don't make a lot of noise, but I am sure that we are more noisy than the single woman who lived here before. She didn't have any pets and we have a dog and many other pets. They have never complained about the sounds from our part of the house, and we always try to be keep the noise down and avoid loud music late at night. I think that you are right, as neighbours we should be accommodative. We all have to be here and if we respect eachother we are able to live together without too many problems.
• Philippines
1 May 12
as for us, we can't hear them because we live in a community with houses a few meters away. if you have the means you can transfer to a house with neighbors 20 meters far. if not, you can turn the volume of your tv high, maybe in that way they will get the message that they are noisy.
• China
1 May 12
I am still a student, so the place i live in is a university apartment. The whole apartment has nine floors, and every floor has a corridor in the middle with both sides having several bedrooms. The oppsite side of our bedroom lives several boys majoring in music. Sometimes, day or night, they like to practice their voice. And I can't imagine why their voice are so noisy to me and other girls. Sometimes, they indeed disturb our resting.
1 person likes this
@Sreekala (34312)
• India
1 May 12
Hello Porcospino, We are also able to listen when the neighbours make any quarrel. Usually at the time of quarrel the sound is automatically increasing that is the reason it come to our ears. Otherwise we can’t hear any talks in their home. It is really annoying to listen the quarrel between couples. Once we wake up at 3 am from a deep sleep by listening the screaming of the daughter of our neighbour, she was trying to prevent her parents from a fight. Next day I asked to her mother, what was going on here, is this the time to quarrel, she said her hubby was drunk and made some stupid comments. Anyway they never quarreled after that incident in the midnight. (I am not sure whether my question worked on them).
@justme0k (152)
• United States
30 Apr 12
We don't anymore but along time ago we did. Our neighbors really loved each other. ;)
1 person likes this