I ask for help from a friend for money.

You are a good writer. Anyhow. thanks for your response. I will stop this game for us to relieve ourselves. Thanks again.

Thank you for your gracious comments. I figured out that -based on your story and consistently clear responses to our fellow mylotters- it is understood that you have wonderful intentions; and at this point, I have no doubts that you'll do the honorable thing. Enjoy, ok?

Last night, I can't sleep and he was still online on yahoo messenger so I sent a message to him. He said that I should save my words when I came at the airport but I can't. I have to tell him. I told him that he would no longer going to pick me up at the airport. My uncle will. And I thank him for every thing he have to for me. There's a little relieve from my heart and it helped.

I agree with apoljuice1 that if you owe him money, you could just pay him back the amount instead of just leading him on into thinking that you have feelings for him. Also, it is right to avoid complication at he onset of the situation. Do not let it complicate things further.

Yes, I really do need that money and I will pay him back. Five years of trying to be with me is too much for him but still he waits for me. I do like to try to have a relationship with him more than friends. But every time I let myself to set that mind he would crashed it by being too fast and skipping some basic steps. He would go into marriage instead of taking some dates or being together for some time. I would want to know him better but it turns me off every time that marriage thing happens.

Skipping some basic steps can sometimes ruin such good times. It's better to know each other more and learn things from each other and not just jumping into marriage. True love waits. Maybe he didn't really love you. Maybe it's just lust he feel for you. Learn to observe how he acts every time he sees you or he's with you. Don't give into his ideas of carrying you cause you might get hurt both if you don't get what you both wanted. Think of it before doing it...

Dear, after readin most of the responses, it looks like you're not really into him. I know this feeling. I've gotten into a relationship with a guy because something happened between the two of us. During that time, I felt that it was very wrong for something to happen when we didn't have a relationship with one another. So i told him so. We were bothsingle anyway, and I thought I wouldn't have let anything happen if I didn't like him, right? So since I sort of like him, maybe it's okay to get into a relationship with him. We didn't know each other that well since we were just acquaintnaces o a date. But he did prove himself worthy as a boyfriend. Very loyal, caring and sweet. He was also very needy, emotional, and he was always talking about getting married. I was 16 then, he was my first serious relationship and he wanted us to get married??? It was something I wasn't ready for. I was just testing the waters to see what would happen, and how far we could take it, but I was in no way ready to get wed to my first boyfriend whom I didn't even fall in love with in the first place! If nothing happened between us, would I even consider being his girlfriend? Of course not! There were a lot of things I wasn't ready for in this relationship, and there were also things about him that I didn't really like because we were moving way too fast. Eventually I told him I told him I wanted out, and he became possesive and threatened to kill himself. Since it was my first relationship, that scared me a bit, so I stayed with him until I realized that all I was doing was staying with him out of pity. In the end, I got fed up with his constamnt threats, and his neediness and his possesiveness, and just told him I'd had enough. I wasn't afraid if he killed himself; hey he wanted out in life, let it be, I thought. I guess what I'm trying to say is, I shouldn't have let myself be carried away. It was my fault too, because I was thinkng too much. He hadn't made me any promises, but I felt we needed to be in a relationship. That's probably what makes our situation different. But just make sure you make it clear to him what you really want. Don't let him fall into a fantasy that this is all final and everything. Make sure it's someting you really want. If it's not, make sure you also let him know so that you can avoid any confusion. Good luck! I hope it works out.

apoljuice, that was such a story you have there. It was really scary to hear that your bf would want to kill himself if you got separated. Well, I think it's the factor that you are both young back then that's why he said that and acted like that. How are you both now? Have you still been seeing each other? I hope you're okay now and having happy life... It's hard to have partner who loves you but then too much possessive and to a point he wants to end his life when you are gone. It's not a good thing to end up your life just like that. Life is too short not worth to be wasted just for a love life failed. newgirl, I know it's hard sometimes to talk about not having a feeling of likeness or love in a person. But you have to be true to yourself and to him and tell him that you don't like the way you know him. A few dates can be just few but then, you'll figure out what kind of person he really is. By the way he looks at you, acts if you're with him, etc... You will know if there's something to be loved at him. If not, well don't force yourself to like him or love him cause it's not love at all. and you are forcing yourself to something you really don't like at all. If you love him, it will come out of you. But then, if not, talk to him and tell him what you really feel. It's not right to trap yourself in a relationship you're not really happy with...

We've met five years ago but I haven't known him personally. We did few dates together but all of them makes me annoyed him a lot. I would like to love him but I can't. I don't know how. But I can feel his love for me. I know fives years is too much for him to wait but it's not for me.

Of course there can always be pain in relationships or friendships. Those happen always to make us stronger and learn how to live with each other. Just be open to him that you want to know him more and learn to like him first before he has the chance to touch you. Allowing him to touch you may cause something to him. I don't know, but if he loves you, he must learn to wait and respect your decisions. Not jump on what he really want. What do you say?

Yes, you are correct. He should respect my decision and wait. If that time comes and it is not what he expected. Then at least we tried.

For now all I want is to like him. But there are things that scares me. and I might hurt him or even myself. But I do want to like him.

Yes, I sense it the first time he said yes. But, I might like to experience it though. But now, I've already told him what my plan is. We will not going to meet anymore at the airport. I'll just pay him back through bank transfer. And I know he was mad at me until now but I know I did the right thing.

I felt uncomfortable by the way you tell that he keeps on loving you and he is planning for your future. Yes, it can be sweet that he is planning for your future of being together and having a family but then he didn't even think of you. What do you really feel about him and of course it has to be two way parties being in love together and not just one sided love. Have you ever told him what you feel about him? Analyze yourself first and let him know what do you really want. I can relate to this situation before when I had a boyfriend he used to love me more of himself and that he wants me to be his wife but then I am not sure about my feelings for him. I guess I just gave into the idea that he likes me and I did like him cause he's a joker at times and makes me feel safe and treats me gently. He loves me but then my feelings isn't enough to make him happy. I know he deserves better than me so I told him I don't have feelings for him anymore. It was years ago and we don't usually have communications anymore. I hope he is always happy and found the right one for him. But you know what, I don't know if he still have feelings for me cause one time we did chat and feels like he is still hoping for us to be together. But I know he is excited everytime one girl is talking or spending time with him.

Don't push yourself to like him cause even how much you tried, if it does not really come from the heart, you are just wasting both of your time.... You may hang out with him more and communicate with him more than the usual and see how much interest you got when you are with him. This way you can easily predict what you really feel about him...

We haven't tried to be really into a relationship yet but I would love to try. And if it's not going to work then I'll let him know. I might end up getting hurt but it's part of a relationship, right? I'll just keep a distance and keep my faith that it would work out.

Yes, today. I have tried to tell him that is it alright to give him my cell phone to pay the money but he change the topic instead. I will pay him back and I will talk to him about it. I will not take advantage of him again. And it sounds like I am not a good friend here. And might not.

Yes you are correct. We really need a true fried. But it's rare nowadays.

I think true love is not enough if one party is not willing to compromise and I am that party. I maybe confuse with my feelings with him and it has to stop and start to move on. I might not love for that five years and I will not in the future and it will hurt him more. I don't want that to happen between the two of us. I have to stop this.