I'm a horrible friend..*sob*
By jhustinian
@jhustinian (612)
Philippines
May 9, 2012 2:42am CST
I've forgotten my best friend's birthday!! And to top it all, it's her 18th birthday, and 18th birthdays are so important with girls (but not to me). She's a very sentimental person and I believe she's not so happy that I was not there when she celebrated it. I was so caught up with my online life and friends. I'm so busy with commissions and art requests and reading all those books and planning how to spend the rest of my vacation that I've forgotten about my social life outside the internet world.
I've checked my phone after the long day, at 8 pm, and saw messages from her and from my other friends about her birthday, and that I should be there. I wasn't able to send a reply to her because I currently doesn't bother to load my mobile phone 'coz I'm not into texting anyway, so it'll expire later without me, using it.
Do you think I'm a horrible friend too? I apologized to her in FB and I know it's not enough. Now I don't know if I could still face her,...birthdays are nothing to me, but we're different person with clashing personality so it means a lot to her. What should I do?
1 person likes this
6 responses
@welkin (106)
• China
9 May 12
Friend,sorry to hear that you forgot the girl's birthday.But still,you should cheer up.Try to do something helpful.The least thing you should do now is escaping.
In my view,apologizing to her in FB is far from enough.It's important to apologize to her face to face.That means you really care about it,since saying sorry in FB seems not so sincere.
Though 18th birthday of a person is very important,it is understandable that you forgot about it,if she really cares about her friend.Apologize to her,in a straight way and send her a late birthday present,to show you really cares about her.Anyway,it's always better late than never,isn't it,my friend?
Friend,forgetting about something does not mean you're not a good friend.Try to do something that can make her walk out the negative emotion of blaming you on this.Stand in front of her and say sorry sincerely.Maybe she is an understanding person inside and doesn't act like what you expect now.
Hope to hear your good news!:)
1 person likes this
@jhustinian (612)
• Philippines
9 May 12
Yeah, I'm planning to meet her, I was hoping today but I heard from my other best friend (who's present in her party) that she has class today and wouldn't be off from school until later. I'm planning maybe at the weekend would be the best time, because at least she's free and I am too. She's a good friend, but as what I've sentimental and add the temperamental too. I just hope she'll forgive me and I'm planning to buy a present for her too but don't you think I'm bribing her or something? I want a simple and meaningful gift. I love painting/drawing and I'll probably attach a personalized card to that...but I'm still think what should I give her as a late present..
Anyway, thanks for hearing me out. *hug*
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
10 May 12
Honestly, I bet the "gift" doesn't and won't mean as much to her as you spending some time with her. It wouldn't for me. I could care less about presents. If I do get a gift, something that someone took the time to make means so much to me that I would NEVER get rid of it. My cousin gave me a cd she made a couple of years ago of all the corny music we had listened to together over the years.I absolutely loved it!
1 person likes this
@welkin (106)
• China
10 May 12
You're right!Buying a normal gift wouldn't be a good choice.A meaningful gift made by yourself is absolutely the best.Only a unique gift(a handmade gift is the best)can make her feel your sincerity.As you've mentioned,a painting and a personalized card are fantastic.
Hearing a friend out is really something I'm willing to to.If what I said is somewhat helpful,that'll be better.:D
Hope to hear the news that she forgives you and your relationship keeps firm as before,my friend.Best wishes to you!
1 person likes this
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
10 May 12
Hi Jhustinian,
No. You are not a horrible friend at all. You feel terrible which shows you care a great deal about her. You are being too harsh on yourself. You actually sound like a really cool friend. I had a friend who got invited to my 50th birthday...a milestone too. He was a very good friend of mine and I have to say that I looked around the many people that showed up and finally asked my daughter who'd planned the party (it was a surprise) "Where is Dennis?" He was invited but got the time mixed up and showed up hours early. He had to travel a bit to get there and had other plans for later. Like you, he felt just awful. I just laughed. It was so typical Dennis. He later brought me up a real sweet card and a gift and then proceeded to clean and wax my floors. That is what he does for work. It was a great gift. Then we hung out for the evening. It was like having an extended birthday and I got to probably spend more time with him than I would have at the crowed party anyway. Go tell your friend how you feel and spend some time with her and I'm sure it will all be ok.
1 person likes this
@jhustinian (612)
• Philippines
10 May 12
Thanks for reassuring me. *hug* I hope everything would soon be fine. You have a great friend too. I would actually like it better just to talk the day away with my friends than parties. ^^
@ladyhemingway (965)
• Philippines
9 May 12
Hello jhustinian, forgetting your best friend's birthday does not commensurate to you being a horrible person. You are just human so you are liable to things like that so don't be too hard on yourself. I suggest that you make it up to her instead. It is good that you have already apologized and mean it. Why not visit her or give her a gift to make up for the lost time? I am sure that you will be forgiven because that's what true friends do.
@ladyhemingway (965)
• Philippines
9 May 12
Oh, I am having a problem with my internet connections, I apologize for the double post.
@ladyhemingway (965)
• Philippines
9 May 12
Hello jhustinian, just because you forgot your friend's birthday it already equates to you being a horrible friend. You are just human so it is just normal that tend to be forgetful at times. It may be hurtful for your friend but since you have already apologized and really mean it, eventually it will be okay between you and her. Also, if I may suggest, you can make it up to her by doing something really special. Why not visit her or give her something as a gift.
@jhustinian (612)
• Philippines
10 May 12
Thanks, and I've received her response from my apology, she said she understands but she had a crying emoticon beside it and now I feel worse. I've asked her if she have plans on this weekend 'coz I'm planning to meet her so we could hang out but she told me she don't know and she'll just inform me later when something came up. I think she's giving me the cold shoulders and it worries me. Giving her a gift doesn't sit that well with me because I'm afraid she'll think I'm just bribing her to forgive me, I'm getting paranoid...
Thanks for responding anyway it's good to know what others think in this situation. Thank you so much. *hug* Have a blessed day.
@audrey92 (20)
• United States
9 May 12
You are not a horrible friend.I bet she was not that mad. If you buy her a nice gift or take her to a nice dinner. I think everyone has forgotten a brithday before. Make the gift or dinner special and personal to her so she can appreciate it more.
@jhustinian (612)
• Philippines
10 May 12
Dinner sounds good but I'm not a good cook at all, and I don't think I could ever cook something edible for that matter. But I'm planning to treat her a meal outside, you think it's fine?
