What if your friend spots your man in the movie with someone else holding hands
By riempie9
@riempie9 (1021)
South Africa
May 10, 2012 2:03am CST
This is something to think about as it puts your friend in a tough spot. If you say something to her, you will open a can of worms and she might even be cross with you instead of being cross with your supposed partner. If you say nothing you are withholding something that she should know and if she finds out you knew all the time and said nothing to her, she might write you off anyway. What do you do? Is there a way for her to get to know without you being involved? If they were not holding hands it would have been nothing as one can go out with friends, but they were holding hands and acting like a couple. Do you tell her?
1 person likes this
7 responses
@collectingstardust (94)
• United States
12 May 12
I wouldn't tell her. I told someone who was a really good friend, that I hung out with practically every day for years. And I only told her because she was such a good friend. Her boyfriend even told me to my face he was talking to and hanging out with other girls, but instead of getting mad at him, she got mad at me! And this was in college, so even people with some maturity can turn completely stupid in the face of love. The girl may be so in love with the boy she can't bear the thought of him cheating on her and humiliating her, so she takes out the anger on the friend who tells her. In my case she tried to spread horrible rumors about me, in the hopes she could make me seem crazy, so that if I told anyone about what her boyfriend did they wouldn't believe me. If I could do it over again I would just not tell her and not have to deal with all the horrible things she did.
1 person likes this
@WakeUpKitty (8694)
• Netherlands
11 May 12
I don't have friends with a partner but if so and I would see them with someone else I don't care. It's her life, her decision and what we see is seldom what it looks like or is. So better be careful with what you say. BTW it reminds me of an episode of "keeping up appearances: Hyacinth spots a "naked" men at her neighbours house getting the milk bottle inside.. she tells her husband her friend has a lover, they have to sell the house, ofcourse the house is worth less money now etc etc.. in the end it turns out to be her friends brother.
@WakeUpKitty (8694)
• Netherlands
11 May 12
Ps don't think anyone will spot my husband since no cinema's in his country (perhaps one), he is a poor basterd, also lives in Africa. And if so it probably is a customer inviting him. About the handholding etc.. a lot of envy over there so I would ignore it. If I don't feel great with him it's over.
@MoonGypsy (4606)
• United States
10 May 12
if it were my best friend, i would not say anything to her. i had this situation once and it back fired in my face. no, not because he wasn't cheating it was because he WAS. the funny thing is, she took him back. he ended up convincing her not to be friends with me anymore.
@butterscotsh (1012)
• Philippines
10 May 12
I personally think that you did the right thing.
It's not your fault she chose the guy over you.
It just means she's not a true friend and you deserve
better friends than her.
@swirlz (3136)
• Philippines
11 May 12
I would tell her. If she gets angry at me for telling her, then something's the matter with her and not with me. I think it is still best to tell the truth, especially something like this, even though it would hurt the people involved; rather than keeping it to yourself to save them the pain, only to hurt them more later on, 'cause no matter what happens it will always come out, and it would always hurt.
If she does get angry, then it would only mean that she doesn't acknowledge me as a true friend, and that she's maybe psycho to still take the guy's side after a reportedly cheating occurrance.
@riempie9 (1021)
• South Africa
11 May 12
If he is in a movie with another girl it obviously means that he does not want to have a relationship with one woman only. That should be enough for you to make a decision. You don't need to have long discussions and talk all around the subject; the bottom line is he was with someone else and someone else has his attention and it is not you. Do you need more than this to convince you?
@Kalyni2011 (3496)
• India
10 May 12
I think one can inform through a common friend, it may work.
Best of luck.
Best of luck.@riempie9 (1021)
• South Africa
12 May 12
One can do that of course, but it is better not to. You don't want to become entangled in a gossip and women who don't like to hear anything negative about the guy she supposedly loves - what's to love after this? - will bark at you. It seems from the responses people agree to cut the relationship... or not to tell her.
@butterscotsh (1012)
• Philippines
10 May 12
As a concerned friend, I will tell it to her.
She has a right to know about it. I am
just concerned and what my friend's man
is doing is just not right. So I will tell
it to her. I don't care if that guy will hate me
or what but I just want my friend to know.
@riempie9 (1021)
• South Africa
12 May 12
I would just cut it. Someone who is so blatantly uncaring that he goes to a public place of entertainment with another woman and holds hands, it a huge marker where his loyalties are. But it is hard I guess to admit that your guy can do something like this. Better not to get involved and better not to ask about it. Even when you tell the truth in these situations it is not appreciated.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
11 May 12
I would just tell my friend. My friends know that I'm a sincere person that I wouldn't do anything to damage their relationship. So if I saw something like that I would tell my friend. She would trust me enough to talk with her partner about it and see what he had to say.
