the husband is not willing to support his family

can i say that he is not responsible husband??

Well, if the husband is fit to work and there is no problem with his health. He should be looking for a jobs to support his family because as a husband he has the responsibility to make a living for his family... If the husband still no jobs and hard to find any jobs. You need to understand the situation. But if he has a jobs and refuse to do his obligation, there is a legal action must be dealing with in that particular issue. If he is refuse to observe his obligation you must file legal action to the court so that the court order him to perform his obligation to his family. I don't know if there's a law in your country about family or about women or civil law that all citizen must concur...

Unles he is a great househusband, the wife should leave him. he can still see his kids but if she isn't getting any support, and by support I don't mean money alone, then she should leave or kick him out. She doesn't need him.

I have known families that the wife is earning more money so the husband will stay home and take care of the kids until they are of school age. Thats cool if they both agree. But a male that just will not work is no good. Ive been taking care of myself since age 16. I taught my clildren to take care of themselves so i will be damn if i will support a male that is too lazy to get off his lazy azz to go to work. They sure will not be in my life long.

Not willing? So it ain't 'not capable'? That doesn't sound good. However, I think the wife and the husband could exchage their role. The wife's working and the husband's doing house work.

Why does the woman go to work to earn money while she is a mom, caring kids, etc...That husband is very bad, i think. He is a man, he should be willing to work to earn money to care his family.

I have found that it is very difficult to assess the relationships of others based on my own principles unless they share with me. As a Zen practitioner, I try to live up to one of the precepts that is about judging others as I cannot know their circumstances. However, it is not an easy thing to do, especially if it involves family members, as I could be the one who ends up with problems if I say anything about such a situation. If I was asked to help though, I would have no option other than to help out a member of my family and would have to take whatever came of it. _Derek

It depends on the situation of the family. Is it something that they both agreed upon? Is he helping out at home in other ways? If he is just refusing to work and if it is putting stress on her then that is just wrong. Both the husband and wife should be working together for the better of the family. Regardless of what I think,it is really a personal matter between the couple .

Well that guy is not worth marrying at all...and if someone married that type of guy, then he is not worth it and should have not married in the first place. If a guy goes into marriage, he should be prepared for the responsibilities of it and that includes supporting the family.

I personally could not live that way, but there are some that do. The question then is, is this what the family wants? Does the wife want to work, while the husband is at home? If they both want it this way, then by all means go for it. I honestly haven't met many couples that had a good marriage from this, but again, it's their deal. Let them have it. On the other hand, if the wife does not want this, and the man is simply refusing to be useful to the family, then this is horrible. You should kick him out of the house, or leave the house yourself. When he gets his brain plugged back in, and working again, let him back in. But as long as he wants to be useless, I'd move out, or move him out. As for me personally, I'm very old school. I think traditionally. I want a women, who is a WOMEN... like... WOW that is a WOMEN! I want her to be the Mother of my children, and I'll be her husband. I'll work, and take care of her. I hope she will work and take care of our family. And that's how I am. Others may differ. Good luck with that.

I know in my case I am willing to make a living until we have children then neither one of us will be working. randy is unable to work because of his serious foot condition and I understand this. I am hoping that we can get a place of our own and then I can run a preschool out of my home. I am also learning different types of crafts so I can try to sell some items online. I already make soap and jewely and will be learning how to quilt and want to learn how to do stained glass. I also paint ceramic ornaments for the holidays. I am looking into sites where I can sell my items and make extra money.

he should not have a family in the first place if that is his attitude. being the head of the family he should take the lead and work for the entire family. i am not saying that the wife should just stay at home but in any case she can help her husband if the time needs. he should be a good example to his children.

On the first place, why can't the husband support his family? Does he not have a job or incapable of working. Actually, it's okay if it is the woman who is the breadwinner , if the husband really cannot. However, the husband should also be willing to do the things what a wife should have been doing , had she not be working. That way, the respect of each other as husband and wife will still be there.

First off, was the husband like this before him and the woman married? Secondly, if so, why would a woman marry and have kids from a man like this? If he became like this after the kids and the marriage, then that's a bad situation and he isn't fulfilling his duties as a family man. I personally feel that a man must provide for his family, but it's not only limited to financially. If the wife is out working and he is being a good father to his kids, then I don't see anything wrong with it. Of course society in general will look at such a man as a deadbeat without even knowing the entire situation. Job losses and layoffs do happen. That's not an excuse, but everyone does get hit by life. It's all about how a person can bounce back.

Hi Reinykwan, if the issue is "If he in unwilling"it means he is a irresponsible head of the family.If the wife is the one who will work for the family, its okayif the husband will do the household chores and stay in the house with the kids.But if he really don't care at all that's a big problem and this will not be called a Family.

it's true that men sometimes don't care all they know is the wives are there to do what are needs to be done and only them are the provider but what if still the men can't provide? i think they need prayers! hehehe

He must know the real meaning of being a father/husband/head of the family.

It is a complete turn off whenever a man is not willing to support his family. I mean, why build a family in the first place if you are not willing to support it. It is the man's responsibility to take care of the family. Man are lucky because nowadays, there are women who are willing to work as well in order to help in raising the family. Well I am speaking in the context of our culture here in the Philippines.

This is just my opinion, but I would not be with a man who wont work. I cannot tolerate a lazy man. It's easy for me to sit her and be philosophical about this, but he would have to go.

The husband and wife can talk to that. If the the husband can't provide the financial needs of the family then he must take the responsibility of the wife. But, if the husband doesn't want to take it, much better if he leave the house. But, it's up to the wife to make the decisions.