What do you find attractive in people?
By betterdays
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
Philippines
May 28, 2012 12:06am CST
There are many positive traits that we can see in people that wanted us to be friends or lovers with them. Some good traits I could mention are kindness, charm, intelligent, understanding, forgiving, loving and others but some people also consider material wealth as an attractive part of a person. How about you, what do you find attractive in other people that wanted you to befriend them or even wanted to be their lover?
3 people like this
21 responses
@SinfulRose (3527)
• Davao, Philippines
28 May 12
It would be a person's honesty. I would want to befriend a person who is very honest and frank but also sensitive. An honest personality means someone you can fully trust. And trust between two people makes relationships. For example: The level of trust between strangers is different to the level of trust between friends. The same goes for the trust between acquaintances and the trust between couples.
If I do not trust a person, why the heck would I want that person near me? If I want to be with someone, be it a friend or family, in the same room I want to be able to trust that person with my life, else I'll find a way to get out of the room and away from that person.
1 person likes this
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
I agree that you can't give the same trust to a stranger as to the trust you give to a dear friend whom you know so well. I believe trust is very essential in any relationship and that any relationship without it would not survive. And to develop this trust, I would say it would take years of knowing that particular person...it takes time to trust somebody.
@SinfulRose (3527)
• Davao, Philippines
29 May 12
That's why if a person is honest, I can easily give him/her my trust--maybe after 2 to 5 years time. I don't just trust anybody, you see. But if I find a person who is true to himself--and to me, I would not hesitate befriending him/her.
. I don't just trust anybody, you see. But if I find a person who is true to himself--and to me, I would not hesitate befriending him/her.1 person likes this
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
Yes I agree, 2 to 5 years time would be a good enough time to be able to know someone fully enough to give your trust in that person :D
I also wouldn't give my full trust in a friend whom I have known for less than a year...friendship needed to be tested through time, and enough and adequate time we may add :)
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
I think not many people have charm...a loveable character that makes you want to meet that person as much as you can. A very attractive part of a person indeed!
@batcuie (50)
• Romania
29 May 12
Depends in which country you`re living , i`m from Europe and here most of the people are opened and has charm , of course not all , most important is to get along without trying to much , create connections , these things you feel not talk about it :) you feel when a person feels good near you
@drannhh (15219)
• United States
29 May 12
I do not care much about looks or money, but as I would not wish to be anyone's sugar-momma, s/he would have to be self-supporting at the least, and have enough means to be able to go the places I would want to go and do the things I would want to do. In order to do that they could not be too disheveled. 
But I never fall for a pretty face or a fancy car. My friends would have to have some common sense and a sense of decency and some enthusiasm for whatever interest we might share. Well, that pretty much describes the friends I have.
But I never fall for a pretty face or a fancy car. My friends would have to have some common sense and a sense of decency and some enthusiasm for whatever interest we might share. Well, that pretty much describes the friends I have. 1 person likes this
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
I could understand how important it is for anyone to be self-supporting because s/he shows a sense of responsibility and people like this are likeable, in my opinion. I can't imagine liking someone who is lazy, irresponsible and doesn't try to help those people close to them by not working and earning for a living, not only for him/herself but for those whom s/he needed to support.
1 person likes this
@jazel_juan (15746)
• Philippines
29 May 12
Physically i get attracted by their eyes and their smile..
but when it comes to being friends with them, i sometimes see if we have common denominators, if we like the same thing, we do the same thing.. it roots from there.
1 person likes this
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
speaking about liking someone with common denomiators, in my case I like someone who have the same hobbies as mine and some of the hobbies I'm interested in are playing tennis, chess & other sports, music (singing, listening and composing), reading books and dancing. Others are those who are into online business. When I see people have these similar hobbies and leanings, I immediately find that person a potentially good friend.
@jambi462 (4576)
• United States
29 May 12
There are many things I find attractive in people and I think that pretty much everyone has some kind of attractive or beautiful features. What I am really attracted to physically is a really pretty face with beautiful eyes. I am really interested and attracted to uniqueness and personality. I like people that express themselves and aren't afraid to be who they want to be.
As far as actual traits go though I love people that are compassionate, loving, free of judgment, open minded, willing to try new things, people that are into the same things as me. I like people that are interested in their health and the health field in general as well as healthy food and cooking and things like that. I also am pretty attracted to anyone that likes unique music or music that is similar to me.
1 person likes this
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
I would honestly say that I too am attracted by physical beauty, and who doesn't in all honesty?
I would say many character traits are generally highly sought-after traits like being compassionate and loving, open-minded and free of judgement. Someone who is also compatible with us would be attractive. I would surely like someone who shares the same hobbies as mine, so I would also say the generally people find other people attractive due to the fact that they share the same hobbies, same thoughts and same leanings in life.
@riempie9 (1021)
• South Africa
29 May 12
What I find attractive in people is their spirit; someone who loves life, loves God, is curious like I am about everything and look for the best in people rather than the worst. I take a long time to make friends. I have many acquaintances and many readers and many friends, but I tend to gravitate towards people who are not bowled over by religion, but can converse with people of all walks of life. I also like people who are adventurous and risk takers and have the spirit to try new things.
1 person likes this
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
I would say like attracts like. Reading what you have just written, I would say that you are a person who are good spirited who loves life and God, someone who looks for the best in people, not bowled over by religion, can converse with people of all walks of life, adventurous and a risk-taker. I may not be exact in these claims, but I felt I would not be far from the truth. Would you confirm what I have just claimed, riempie?
Anyway, my point is that I believe that what we see attractive to others are oftentimes what we see in ourselves, or at least desire to have.
@Madona1 (2096)
• Gibraltar
28 May 12
I like people who is witty, intelligent, honest, charming and humorous. Of course, if we can have something in common so that we can go clubbing, parting or outing together. It is not easy to find someone who has all these personality together. So all my friends can be divided into two different groups, group one can go outing frequently; group two can get together occasionally to share our views and supports. LOL
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
Yes,having something in common is of course a good way of looking for a friend or a lover. I can see you have two sets of friends...those who like to go outing and those who have intellectual discussions with you.
I know what it is to have different types of friends who fits certain categories that we have different from other categories. I too have different friends depending on the talents and hobbies I have. I have tennis friends, business friends, a few chess friends and foreign friends (clients to my online jobs or businesses ).
@sender621 (14893)
• United States
29 May 12
Finding someone attractive may start with physical features but it does not end there. I find the attitudes and behaviors of people and how they react to others just as attractive if not more than appearance.@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
Yes, I see a lot of physically attractive people who would be terrible friend or lover generally because they lack good character. I agree that character rules in looking for a friend or a lover.
@airasheila (5454)
• Philippines
29 May 12
A pleasant day BetterDays4Me,
Same as you are, I do also find attractive those characteristics that you have mentioned. And I just want to add a few. I do also find attractively if the person or that friend is willing to accept me for who and what I am. As there are some people who looks not on the quality traits instead they are looking on the quantitative side.
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
A pleasant day as well airasheila,
I would say it's really true that we have a soft spot for those people who accepts us for hat we are, listens to what we say with real concern and makes us feel that we are good people even though they know our existing faults. I myself seek friends like that, and who wouldn't?
@jricky1 (6800)
• China
29 May 12
I think exactly the same as you coz i feel people really attracted to me that if she or he is charming and also have really good personality.If the man who is loving enough,then i suppose it is definitely the man that i want to befriend and close.
1 person likes this
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
Charming, good personality, loving...three things that any man or woman would want for their friends or lover. Without these, a relationship could easily turn dull and boring...even unworthy.
@yel812 (174)
•
29 May 12
Well I find people attractive by their charms, and if they are amiable and easy to be friend with that will be a big factor. Intelligence is also a factor. I also love people who are optimistic and who stays cool despite of the trouble around that person. Liking a girl is a bit different for me because it will have a mixed of physical attraction. I love girls with beautiful eyes.
1 person likes this
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
I may hate to admit it, but I do look for intelligence as well in terms of looking for friendship or lover. I think most people who love to have sensible conversations and it gives you a sense of self-esteem when you have intelligent friends.
A person who knows how to stay cool in spite of great tribulations in life is surely a sign of strong character. That person, besides being a potential good friend and lover, will be a man who controls his own destiny.
@viji_v2 (727)
• India
29 May 12
Sometimes it happens that we can't find a reason but like a person. Also sometimes vice versa happens we tend to hate someone.
I would check first their morality to others. If they are honest and be a conscientious person, I like them. When it comes like outer character, we can rule out it in speech. The way they speak show them.
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
I agree with what you say that the way a person speaks would show their inner character. You could usually detect if a person is honest, trustworthy, loving, kind, unkind, fun loving, etc. I think this is what you call discernment.
I think checking out a person first to others is a good way of knowing if the person could be a potentially good friend or lover. Those people who knew them well could give you some important feedback about that person you are interested in, unless of course if the one you're asking is an enemy of that person or someone who is also romantically interested with you.
@lafredricktaylor (256)
• United States
28 May 12
the most important thing to me in a person is loyalty, trust, and understanding. i have accepted that everyone is different and no two people will treat you the same way. but as long as you can be trusted then i can establish a friendship with anyone..also a person that has a drive that they want to have something in life is a plus. but an ugly person can be beautiful to me if they have a great attitude..
1 person likes this
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
Loyalty, trust and understanding are some of the missing links in relationships nowadays. I think there are so much distrust in people because they are looking at the wrong values and are becoming to materialistic...judging everything and everyone in terms of how much it is and how much money they have. I won't say that there is something wrong with having lots of money or befriending someone like that, but if you look only of money as your basis in making friends or a lover, then I think that relationship is shallow and has no chance of growing deeper.
In terms of the physical, I also agree that physical unattractiveness can be compensated well by inner beauty.
@dudestar488 (1)
•
28 May 12
lady like/gentle/elegant/delicacy/panaache
sense of humour/cuteness/shy/playfull
Intelligent/sophistcated
sincerity/seriousness
trustworthy/dependable/faithfull
impartial/fairness
1 person likes this
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
Hi dudestar, I also like a girl with the descriptions you have written and I also look for sincerity, trustworthiness, faithfulness and dependability and also has a sense of humor. I could either go for cute or beautiful, a bit shy but playful would be great so you could have a good time together. When it's time to be serious, I would want her to have the seriousness demanded by the situation ( maturity ).
@musicman6 (2407)
• United States
28 May 12
What I find attractive in people, whether it be male or female, is the trait that when you speak with them, they give you 100% of their attention, and make you feel like a friend you have known forever!
Another trait I find a attractive, is when I meet a person that has compassion for others, no matter what gender, race, or age they are!
Another trait is I like conversing with individuals that can carry on an intelligent conversation with you no matter what the subject is!
1 person likes this
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
I can understand why it's important for you that your friend gives you 100% of their attention. I believe a person who doesn't focus much on what you say doesn't care much about your opinions and doesn't care much about you as well ( unless of course if they have attention deficiencies ). A person who has compassion for others is surely a loveable trait. Its sad to admit that a person could be so kind but at the same time so boring, so I think having an added skill of being interesting and a good conversationalist is a great added character to look for.
@GemmaR (8517)
•
28 May 12
One of the things that I think is important about people in general is that you should be able to trust them no matter what. If I am am not able to trust people, then I honestly don't think that I would be able to having anything to do with them for this reason. All of my friends are people who I can trust, and I would never allow anybody to be my friend if this was not the case for them. They also have to be fun, because they need to be able to cheer me up if I should need them to for whatever reason, because friends are always supposed to be able to make you feel good about yourself.
1 person likes this
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
I believe trust is an important factor in any relationship, whether with a friend or a lover. I can only imagine you having a lot of good friends besides you because they are all people you can trust...I can only imagine your lover would be the same.
Looking for fun-loving friends or lovers, why not? This keeps us from getting bored, and I believe at this present times when there are a lot of problems and difficulties, having fun-loving people around you whom you could trust could really make a difference.
@safety69 (592)
• Taiwan
28 May 12
First i will look his eyes , the way he looks at me. I will observe the way he talks , the way he moves, how smart and polite , how loving will be from the first moment. I dont like them to talk about money or what are their posesions, i dont care about that , any descent work will be fine with me , ( he has to have a job) i dont like lazy guys. Everyone has their own type of person , so what is good for one can not be good for others , that depends.
1 person likes this
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
I agree everyone has their own preferences. The way you describe what you want in a man, it's about mannerism and attitude...especially being polite and loving. I guess no woman would want a man who doesn't have a job. How about in a friend, what characteristics do you look for in a friend?
@jvincent_129 (4994)
• Philippines
28 May 12
Of course, their personality. I like someone who is very witty and intelligent. Someone who has a sense of humor and knows how to entertain people.
1 person likes this
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
A friend or a lover with great personality, witty and intelligent? Then I can imagine you as a person who is likewise, because I believe in the saying "birds of the same feather flocks together." Of course, it would be nice if our partner or friend would be funny and entertaining...maybe showbiz personalities would fit your requirements very well, jvincent.
@ONLYHOPE (189)
• Philippines
28 May 12
hai
honestly speaking when picking for a friend/lover, I don't care about their situation in life,or whoever he/she is as long as we are compatible to each other, and whatever happens still holding hands to help each other, and honest to each other..
Have a nice day
1 person likes this
@BetterDays4Me (3777)
• Philippines
29 May 12
Yes, I have read a lot about the importance of compatibility with one's friend or lover which means having similar interests, attitudes, likes & probably dislikes, family background, status, hobbies...or a combination and others.
You talked about honesty which I think is also very important in a relationship, because honesty breeds trust and when you trust someone the relationship is bound to work. Have a nice day as well.
