How can you ask people for money?
By 911Ricki
@911Ricki (13588)
Canada
June 5, 2012 9:10am CST
My younger brother comes down and asks to borrow money. I told him no I dont have change (I rarely carry cash), and he can find a job and earn his money.
He doesnt have any gas in his car, and doesnt work. My parents, sister, and grandmother pay him money. I simple wont have it, and the fact I had to earn my money to pay for my gas at his age so can he.
He took a fit, saying how he has no money and he has places to go. He is skipping school right now btw. I asked where he had to go thats just that important. He proceeded to carry on how he has to see his girlfriend. To me that isnt important at all, and if she wants to see him that badly then she can pay his gas money (oh wait she doesnt work either).
I just walked away laughing, Im not giving him money I know he woukldnt pay back. He needs to learn money isnt handed to him, and he has to work for money. He has had amble opportunities for jobs and he always as a reason not too.
3 people like this
10 responses
@redhotpogo (4401)
• United States
5 Jun 12
Just tell him girls like responsible people, and if he continues on he's going to lose his girl to someone who makes their own money one day. If he isn't willing to work for money to treat his girl then he doesn't really love her, and why would you give him money to see a girl that he doesn't even love.
@911Ricki (13588)
• Canada
5 Jun 12
She just as oblivious to the real world as he is. She thinks since her parents pay for everyhting so should his. I agree she will find a guy who owns his own car not drive his parents, and treats her and spends his money on her. Which my brother didnt even pay for her prom ticket, or buy her flowers.
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
6 Jun 12
It sounds to me as if he is always trying to bum something off of you and yet he hasn't gotten it yet, you won't do it. You think the others would take a page from your book and do the same as he does need to learn. Better this way then the hard way out in life. It won't be easy for him.
@911Ricki (13588)
• Canada
6 Jun 12
I agree he thinks the world is in his hands. He doesnt see the big picture in life, and expects everyone just to hand it over. I mean if he was working and didnt have money I may consider but the fact hes too lazy to get a job to pay for what he already has. The other 3 of us kids at the age of 16 had to get out and get a job, and pay for everything including rent, and our other bills.
@Lauraleigh99 (4718)
• United States
5 Jun 12
Everyone is enabling him by giving him money and they need to quit. He needs to grow up and become resposible by getting a job. Why work when people hand everything to him. Good job holding strong and not giving in
@911Ricki (13588)
• Canada
5 Jun 12
I agree completely on that. He has never had responsibility, and sint mature for his age. Why get a job when he gets it given to him for free by everyone else who feels sorry for him. When I was his age I worked 2 jobs while going to school full time I feel no pitty for him at all.
@GardenGerty (160879)
• United States
5 Jun 12
I guess eventually he will learn that you will not give him money. You always turn him down. I agree that the people who constantly give him money are only teaching him to be dependent. When does school let out? What will he do then?
@911Ricki (13588)
• Canada
5 Jun 12
I wont give him a penny because he is fully capable of working, and hes just lazy. The others are just allowing him to be this way, my older brother was the same for years, and still my grandmother gives him money because he cant budget properly. It doesnt finished for a few more weeks, but he just doesnt see the point in going now. He is suppose to get a job, and earn money for college. But that has yet to happen. He wants everyone to do the work of applying for him, his attitude and behaviour shows when he applies and they simple dont want him. He applied to one place, and my SIL father took him in and knew the owner, and my brother has been ignoring the phone calls. But sooner or later people wont hand him money left and right. My parents are already fuming over his jack in insurance since he got in those accidents. His girlfriend and him think they are going the graduate and buy a house be together forever with no education, and nno jobs. I just sit back and laugh at how stupid they make themselves sound since both are living off their parents and never worked aday in their lives.
@cher913 (25782)
• Canada
5 Jun 12
aw the poor muffin. my daughter is like that too but but we say no and now when she is looking for a job, there are not that many out there, but when we told her to get a job, she didn't so she has no one to blame but herself.
as for your brother; is he planning to be 40 and still living with his parents?
@911Ricki (13588)
• Canada
5 Jun 12
I think he is and since he is the baby its acceptable. Its funny as the other 3 of us once we turned 16 we had to find a job, and pay our own bills. He is almost 18 and has yet to lift a fiinger, and get money handed to him which I would never dream of in my life asking my parents. But I sit backa nd laugh at his excuses he has for not working, and everyone falls for it. I mean if he was working and suddenly something happened he needed the money I would reconsider but not when hes not working and I wouldnt see the money again.
@sajuman (1854)
• India
6 Jun 12
Good.You did the right thing.As young age people are nowadays spends lots of money.They should be controlled.We have to give them money but in a controlled manner.otherwise they will forget the value of earning.They will understood the situation they will work hard for the money.
@sender621 (14893)
• United States
5 Jun 12
I have never found iteasy in asking someone else for money. even in desperate times it was still awlward for me.I guess i just find it wembarrassing and discouraging that I would need the financial help. i don;t want to feel ike i am begging. It takes a lot of motivating before I could even aske for mony whether the amount was big or small.. I feel so much better about myself when i don;t have to ask anyone for money.
@hestylim (1210)
• Indonesia
6 Jun 12
Hi there,
I can say that you are being very kind to your brother.. Lol. I have brother like yours. Your brother is still studying, my brother isn't anymore. My brother recently got jobs but still he asks for money. In my opinion, giving them money again and again can harm them. It can make them lazy and think that they always have places to ask for money.
I never give money to my brother. Only my sister and my mom. I want to teach him how to be independent, moreover he is the only man in the family. But, I think, he just never understands at all.
I suggest you to talk to your brother and find a way to teach him how to be independent. Hopefully it will work on your brother.. :)
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
5 Jun 12
Wow! Ricki, your family keeps enabling your brother to remain a child. You seem to be the only person in your family that has any work ethic at all. He will never learn to take care of himself at this rate. Your parents trained you to take care of yourself. They refused to help you at all. Why is he any different?
@renzonation (254)
• Philippines
6 Jun 12
well, being polite and ask in a friendly way is one of the basic when you are asking a money to anyone or anybody .. but also the question there is that , what do you do if you are reject by that person.?
