start as friends or lovers

I'd love to be in friendship first also. However with the time, if it changes to the love, then just do it...i often do follow what my heart wants...

That's the best thing a person SHOULD do.. It is unnatural to fall in love with someone you don't know yet. Infatuation is the right term for such things like that. The first respondent was really correct, that cycle was true.

I would start out as friends and see where it goes from there. Just do things you like to do as friends like going to watch a movie or whatever and then wait and see if there is any kind of connection between you too and then if you feel there is then you can move forward and see where it leads.

It seems to make more sense to be friends first. That way you are loving a friend and not a complete stranger. Unless of course it happens all about the same time. You might feel like you can't do much about that except slow things down a bit when you need to. A friend will always understand and sometimes say, that is a good idea for me too. On the other hand why turn away love if you really need a lover. Hope this is not just confusing because the truth is only your heart knows the real answer.

I think there are alot of factors that go into that. It depends on the situation too, I have had relationships that went right into it and i have where we were friends first. to be completely honest though the relationship i was in where we were friend 1st was the worse one i was ever in. He ended up being really mean to me and completly diffrent then when we were just friends. so that didnt last too long. my first relationship ever we talked for like maybe a week then dated so i dont think we were really friends, that one was very sort but, i was only 15 and he was 18. The relationship in the middle we meet and started dating pretty soon after that one actully lasted over a year and a half and i though for sure it was the one but, things change and he moved to the other coast so about 3000 miles away, we kept it up for so long but, he ended up ending it. Now i am happy to say that i meet a really great guy we been together for 10 months today and I think its finnally true love. we werent friends first. so i dont know i think its diffrent for everyone.

What do you feel on the person you are talking to. Perhaps it is better to think how you feel before deciding on that. Being friends first is much better than entering in a relationship as lovers when in fact you are not yet sure about your feelings but if you really love the person. Even if you see something wrong you will still love that person.

I think you are right in that perception because if you make friends first you will know him/her better and find out who really the person you adore. But most of the thing in a relationship is not the same. Because sometime the behavior is different from the relationship of friendship and love

I think that beeing friends before the relationship step you have more advantages, you may know the real person,the likes and dislikes.,and the real personality she / he has. In the hand, I said that would be okay of you meet someone else out of you circle of close friends, and if you really like eachother,why don't to take the risk. Have a nice day

For me, it's best to start out as friends. You already find out a lot about a person by just being their friend for a while. Normally relationships just start out when you don't look for it. As far as relationships go, my best is right now (of course). We've been friends for about 5 years now, and met up since before I was moving into high school. Around Christmas my feelings for him just blossomed, and I sorta picked up a vibe that he felt just the same. Around my birthday (a few months ago) I began to see he gave a few hints telling me that by him literally saying "Night, love" before he leaves. Soon before Valentines day I finally told him just to get the same answer... And to this day, I feel a strong connection between him and I. One that I've haven't felt in any sort of relationship before. So, friendship is the key to all relationships. Friends, family, or lover.

Ya..I agree with you...If you are acting like a lover,that person will not be fully say you the truth...At least they will say some lie for their future..But if we are treating other like a friend,the person will say you the all details..so you can get or understand the all things about that person..first be a friend..then realize that person's positives and negatives..then fall in love with her/him..In my opinion,that's the good way to understand a person..

Is there a way to 'jump' straight into a love relationship for two total strangers without going thru the process of being friends? How do we love someone who we don't know anything about? I think the natural way for the feeling of love to happen is when you feel that you are attracted more and more towards somebody. And for you to be attracted, you must have felt something good in that person that made you fall for that person. You have to have some interactions with that person to know him/her. We can like someone easily. To love someone genuinely, it will take time and understanding to mold the relationship into a solid and stable emotional attachment for life.

I think that it depends a lot on the way you feel at the moment, and on the way you feel about that particular person. To me, for instance, it always happened to fall in love before even knowing the guy so well. Even with my current boyfriend. I did not want to have a relationship at first, as I just came from a great disappointment. But things happened very quickly, now we are together for over a year and a half, and we became friends afterwards. I think you should listen to your heart.

If your comfortable to start a relationship as friend then go on, take your time to know the person very well before jumped to a love relationship. But on my past relationship I always start a relationship as friends before going to a love relationship but the problem is when we broke up were not friends anymore which kinda sad. So when I met someone who I really like during my college days I jump to love relationship and friendship afterwards. The relationship works very well because my lover became my bestfriend where I can open everything to him and share all my past and plans to him. Maybe because we have common in sight in life and we understand each other. I am very lucky that for the first time I jumped into a love relationship even without knowing him very well but I found out that he is kind and one in a million. Now he is my husband and my bestfriend who always be there for me.

I feel people should start being friends. You don't want to rush anything, right? Get to know what kind of person they are first, then see whether or not your compatible. After that you can choose to pursue them romantically or not.

a relationship has its own natural cycle just like this 1. Get to know each other 2. Followed by knowing each other likes and dislike 3. Learn to treasure each other 4. Then you are in the love nest now 5. Marriage is just a stone throw away.

Hi. I have experienced both situations where I also find that having someone as a friend before being in a serious relationship has more advantage than to start a relationship with someone whom you have just met. When I was in my early 20's, that was when before I was married, there was this guy who were interested in me, but I never knew him. Actually, I was a trainee and he was from other department. I just heard from friends, also trainees who worked at the same department as him that he wanted to go out with me. Well, I, of course was not quite excited about it he he... but I ended up going out with him anyway. I told myself, just to have some fun and there was no harm in doing so. We went out for lunch and movie, yes, it was a date and I have nothing serious, I mean, I have no feelings for this guy, but I didn't know how exactly it happened where he wanted to see me again and then I went out and soon it's like a relationship. It was. Even we've been going out for few years, honestly, there was no spark at least from my side. So, we have lack of communication, I mean, it was difficult for me to open up to him. You know, sometimes, when there were things I wish I could tell him straight to the face, like how I was mad at him and why, I would end up in silence and everytime when we fought or quarrelled and I wanted to discuss about it, he told me to forget about it. Doh. I mean, we've never been friends before and so, it's not natural when most of the time, I didn't know how to react or be myself and there were times I have to control myself otherwise he would say I was not like myself where in reality I was like that except that he's never seen that side of me before. Then, when we broke up, I didn't feel sad or whatsoever, just relief to be able to breathe again. Anyway, there were other relationships... but what I like to share is how I met my hubby. I was a new employee at the office and yes, we met at the office haha, but as a friend. No strings attached. I went out with friends, our workmates, and he was there, too. We had gatherings and some fun trips, and he was also there. So, from there, we knew each other and the feelings developed. So, it's much more natural and we have other things to share before we're into a relationship and he saw who I am before we got engaged and married. It's more comfortable and easy. We are very much open until now. It's easy to talk and it's more special. ;-))) Well, that's my experience and opinion. There's a lot more, but let the others share with you. Good luck in your future relationship!