Girlfriends Sneaking on Their Boyfriend's Phone

Philippines
June 20, 2012 8:12am CST
What do you really feel about this? Is it wrong to play investigator on your boyfriend such as flipping through his FB or even fidgeting on his phone for suspicion of him dating another girl? Would you just let it be? I have a girl friend who has been really paranoid over this? I was starting to think, "dont you think you are being too suspicious" True enough, they argue about this stuff all of the time. I wanted to tell this girl to just get out of this relationship but she seems so into this guy and is dying to get married!!! And i really meant it, she is so dying to get married (her age is 38). She was so eager to get her fiancee's visa already... I am 37 and still not in the hurry... but apart of me thinks that she is starting to get really cheap??? Am i wrong??? What do you feel about all this?
3 people like this
10 responses
• India
20 Jun 12
Grace beti She is certainly desperate, what i know is in your country, because the number of male is less compared to female, most male cheat girls, leave after marriage, they keep multiple relationships too, so better to be alear You will marry soon, may be in india blessings from Papa
1 person likes this
@buddha3 (1026)
• India
20 Jun 12
Professor, would you allow your daughter to marry a foreigner? Or would you get a foreign bride for your son? :) Just a curious question, because you told Grace that she may even marry in India:) Just being curious to know what you think about inter-caste, inter-religious and inter-race marriages!
1 person likes this
• India
24 Jun 12
Well all my kids are married, the marriages were arranged marriages, my nephew married a brahmin girl, they worked together as software engineer, it was kind of love marriage but after we knew we performed the marriage like arranged marriages
@ShyBear88 (59347)
• Sterling, Virginia
20 Jun 12
I think it all depends on your relationship with the person you are with. If they are okay with you looking at there things then you should be equally okay with them looking at your things. I'm 23 and married and my husband and I are okay with each other looking throw our cell phones, and facebook but we also don't hide things from each other. We don't go looking on each others for things. I trust my husband so I don't go looking but I know have the option to if I really want to and my husband trust me. I feel people that tend to look all of the time tend to be more on the jealous side or a bit more sensitive to where some times they think they see things that isn't really going on.
1 person likes this
@ajithlal (14716)
• India
21 Jun 12
I think it also depends on the relationships of the person and how much the person care of others. I think trust and faith lots of role in a relationship.
@ShyBear88 (59347)
• Sterling, Virginia
21 Jun 12
I like I said above it does depending on the relationship so I do agree. But a person should try to trust there partner that they are in a relationship with that they are doing the right thing. I know for some people that can be hard since they have been burned in the past.
@maezee (41988)
• United States
21 Jun 12
I think it's wrong and way too intrusive. I would be pissed if my boyfriend didn't trust me enough to not be texting (or sexting) some other guy. There has to be trust in a relationship otherwise it's doomed to fail, you know? But I guess love can make (men AND women) incredibly jealous and people with insecurities, even worse.
@bubuth (1815)
• Philippines
8 Jul 12
For me it will be okay if the girl is looking on her boyfriends cellphone specially when she feel that there is something wrong. Trust is important to a relationship so the guy must also allow her girlfriend to look on his phone but the girl must not do it more often because she still to respect her boyfriend's privacy. The guy just need to allow his girlfriend to look on her phone just to prove that he is trust worthy.
• United States
21 Jun 12
I think that people that have insecurities like that are doing it because they are doing something themselves. If you are suspicious of such actions, how do you know what they mean if you havent done them. Well I take that back, there may be some faithful people in the world but the people I have come in contact with that has these issues are the same ones that are doing it. But I think if your in a relationship, your friends are mine and vice versa. So there shouldnt be any concern of who is who anyway.
• Malaysia
20 Jun 12
I'm not so sure about being cheap. How does checking on bf facebook and mobile phone is cheap? You were absolutely right about being paranoid though. If you can't trust your partner even a single bit, or at least give him some space to breath how long do you think the relationship would last? Depending on her boyfriend, if he can stand her for regardless of what she did, maybe the relationship would last long anyway but if he's not the type who could just stand and watch his privacy being violated one day i can assure you he will say "enough is enough". I used to have gf more than a year ago (been single for 1 year 6 months already and counting). I am more of a relaxed type. If she feels like she wants to check on my phone i'd say go ahead. My ex did it a few times in the earlier part of our relationship. I know it even though she did it behind my back. After sometime, she stopped. Well i can be trusted is what it means. I myself, no matter what i never wanted to check on her like that. It's kinda pathetic to say the least. Not trusting your partner. If she or he decide to cheat and you found out?? There's always the exit button.
1 person likes this
@ajithlal (14716)
• India
20 Jun 12
I think some girls do sneak on their boyfriend's phone. I am not sure if all girls does it. I think it is mostly because people who does not trust their partners or when the get suspicion about their partners when they do. I am not sure if it is right or wrong and if there is a doubt that comes it should be done.
@sharie16 (2212)
• Philippines
21 Jun 12
Hi Graceekwenx, Sneaking is part of other relationships, but this I tell you is not healthy to a relationship. Once your friend already sneaks, it is good as saying she already lost trust to her boyfriend, or maybe she already felt like there is something wrong. I may suggest that the best way for her to do is to talk to her boyfriend and confront him, sneaking is not good, this may even lead to argument, so better yet to discuss the issue to avoid any quarrel. With her age, there are really some people who are bothered of not getting married. But my question is, is she going to risk on settling down when she knows there is a doubt? When there are unresolved problems? When she cannot fully trust the man? In settling down, you have to remember that this person will be your partner in life FOREVER, you have to consider every detail of it, that you will respect and love him whoever and whatever he is. That's why it is a must that you should know your partner well before planning to settle down. Look, there are a lot of people who remain single but they are contented with their lives. Singleness means happiness to other people. Happy mylotting...
@toniganzon (72281)
• Philippines
21 Jun 12
I totally agree with you. If she doesn't trust him anymore then just find someone else. Even if they end up together i don't see a happy marriage between the two of them because marriage is about trust and commitment. And age is not an excuse by the way.
21 Jun 12
there is one thing that leads to an unhappy marriage is suspicious over little things. trust is so important in a relationship that if its not theres it just takes all the joy out of marriage. about the part that she being cheap, well I've learned that you shouldnt give up on your true love and never compromise on it either. her compromise is very selfish even if she not like that. i wish you the best of luck and just have that talk about whats really important to her right now