Ups and Downs, what pulls you back from the edge

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Ive struggled with major depression for years, have attempted suicide many times and thought about it many more. I had to move home recently because it was too bad for me to stay living away at my uni. Now i have good and bad days. Anyway, someone close to my mom lost her son, he hung himself about a week ago and this has given me what it suspect will be a temporary new perspective. Is this a good thing coming from a tragedy? How can I stop myself from expecting the worst of myself and my thoughts -- this is very difficult. But patterns are there and why would they change. Have you ever seen someone else hurt themselves and reexamine your own state or even suicidal thoughts?