Im beyond irritated now!
By 911Ricki
@911Ricki (13588)
Canada
July 9, 2012 8:21pm CST
I get home from work and here my Mother is cleaning my closet out saying I dont wear this or that.
Now I have old clothes for when I go to work as I work with dirt. When Im at home I wear pajamas usually, and then I have some dressy clothes for special occassions. I had a box full of items that Im selling.
Im ready to snap at her now, Im sorry I dont go through their crap, and tell them to throw it out. Yet, if I did I would be told to mind my own business, and its not mind so why not take their own advice. I pay to be here, its my crap dont touch it.
Half my clothes she steals because she owes 1 shirt, 1 shorts, and 1 jeans the rest she steals from us. My sister wears a medium, and I wear medium or large. She wears a 1XL. She will steal them, stretch them, and they look ridiculous on her because they are so small.
She doesnt go through my sisters room and take her clothes or throw them out. I cant tell you how many times I find my clothes in garbage bags, or in the garbage pale. My sister has a large dresser about 9 drawers cramped full, and a closet all piled full. I barely fill a 3 drawer dresser, and a closet.
Now shes standing at my door as soon as I get home from work carrying on how big of a pig I am, and half my clothes still have tags on, or I dont wear them. Please find me 1 piece of clothing that has a tag on it since none of them do. Why cant she just mind her own business for once, or go bug my brother or sister as clearly their crap isnt worth sorting through. I dont even buy myself clothes anymore because I know they will grow legs and disappear. I have 2 bras, 4 pairs of underwear, 6 pairs of socks, 10 tshirts, 4 sweaters, and 3 pairs of pants. Many are all holes and see through because I dont want to waste my money buying anything knowing I wont have them long.
2 people like this
9 responses
@isha242 (83)
• United States
10 Jul 12
Wow! I think that when you are goin you don't realize how much your parents are looking out for you and trying to help you. I didn't realize this until I started college and continued to unknowingly abode by some of the rules that my parents had laid out. For example never walk alone at night, don't be out past a time, dont try to be friends with everyone, pick only what I
really need and the stuff that I want I can get at a later time, bundle up in he cold, etc. I thought when I moved out that I would be this free bird and prove to her that she was wrong. But she was right. Your mom might be taking your clothes evade she wants to still feel younger and fit in with your style and what you think is cool. After I buy some new shoes, my mom goes out to buy the exact same pair. I also think that she could be giving ur clothes away because maybe someone really does needed them more than you. The outward appearances are less important it's more about the heart and a kind heart is rewarded in the end. Instead of being angry , question her motives, talk to her! Maybe not a formal talk but bring it up jokingly or casually. When you have tough parents or go through situations that may seem unfair it makes stronger inside because you learn from the situation.
1 person likes this
@911Ricki (13588)
• Canada
10 Jul 12
Clearly you find it acceptable for your immediate family to steal from you, be rude and not respect you, and treat you like complete sh!t. I have lived away from home, and went to college those were the best year of my llife because I didnt see, hear, or look at my family I was happy then. I didnt have to worry that my crap will disappear, be thrown out, or stolen from me. Do you knwo what its like to go to work for 12 hours and then your ungrateful family and this including parents steal it. I dont trust them with a penny of mine because I know they will steal regularly I dont do it to them. I have brought it up, I was told deal with it, you wont use it. I dont bother buying myself anything because they steal it. I cant even keep a razor in my house or else someone will steal it. I would love to see you move into here, and tell me its fine and dandy to steal from you, and just put a smile on and pretend like it never happens.
1 person likes this
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
10 Jul 12
What an odd response! I first thought maybe Isha was from another country where this sort of thing is more acceptable?? But I checked the profile and she is from the States. Well, Ricki, if you thought your mom was a bit odd then I think Isha's might be a close runner up and the only difference being is that she seems to be just fine with it. I can't even imagine my daughter's reaction to any of this stuff.My youngest is quite outspoken. I once did a small load of laundry. She had left her jeans on the bathroom floor after her shower. This was not something she did often at all but I grabbed them up and thinking I was doing her a little favor, I washed them with my clothes. And then I made the deadly mistake of throwing them in the dryer...OOPS! Ya, they shrunk and she was so so so upset with me. I should have either left them or tossed them into her room. Anyway..I shrunk them and so guess whose budget got rearranged that week? I meant well but I deserved it. 
1 person likes this
@isha242 (83)
• United States
10 Jul 12
I don't get the point of sid556 response. I don't think any child should disrespect their parents and if you allow that to happen you are making a statement about whose the authority figure. This is not a cultural question about whether those in the US or those outside allow their parents to throw away their clothes. Clothes can be replaced but values are long lasting.
1 person likes this
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
10 Jul 12
I think that the next thing that you need to buy yourself is a lock for your room! I would be livid if anyone did that to me and I sure as heck would not do it to my own daughters. 2 of my daughters are living here with my now and I can't even imagine going through their stuff at all. The 18 yr old just graduated and has been here all along. I do not go in her room unless it is to put something of hers on her bed. My place is a small 2 bedroom and my other daughter just moved back temporarily and is staying in my room. I have a very comfy couch so it's ok. We share the closet etc. I don't touch her stuff at all.
@911Ricki (13588)
• Canada
10 Jul 12
I would assume the saame even while living with roomates we respected each others crap. We shared a bathroom but never touched each others things. Ive tried everything, and Ive had so many people say its so disrespectful, Ive tried bringing it up and they just sit there and laugh. I wont even trust leaving money in my room either. Im carrying around $300 or so cash, and a $800 cheque because I dont trust any of them as money goes missing from my room on a regular basis.
@911Ricki (13588)
• Canada
11 Jul 12
Sometimes I wonder how I became part of this family to begin with. She went through and threw out all my textbooks yes $1,000 worth of textbooks, that were in perfect condition. I take similar classes and use them as a reference. I cant even go to work without them touching my shat. She also threw out my $200 work shoes, I bought about a year ago wore a short period. But Iif I get another job in that field I would have to buy them again. She goes oh well your not using them, well is she going to buy me new shoes no. She had the nerve to throw out both my hampers because they are taking u space in my room. According to her my room has to basically eb empty and if my Dad is babysitting my animals this weekend it has to be like this. Load to me, I walked up started throwing her shat in garbage bags and throwing them out the door. Should of heard her screaming while I touched her useless shat, stuff animals clothes, papers, things from when we were kids. They will never learn I took all my money with me to work, and been carrying it around because its been going missing according to her I dont need it and it lays around (clearly we all need to be in debt like her). I believe shes just jealous, and because Im not following in her footsteps and my sister is this is why shes going this.
@GardenGerty (160696)
• United States
10 Jul 12
Is this something that started kind of recently, or did she do this when you were a kid? If it is recent I would worry that she is developing dementia, if she did this when you were younger I would ask why you even moved in there.
@911Ricki (13588)
• Canada
10 Jul 12
I would say the last year or so. When we moved in it was fine, she would come in put my clothes in even wash them. Nothing was said, especially the last 6 months. She doesnt do it to any of the other siblings, yet my room looks amasing compared to my sisters. I dont bother buying myself anything as I dont trust them with anything. Im currently carrying aroun $300 cash, and a $800 cheque because I dont trust them with it, I would rather carry it around.
@jazel_juan (15746)
• Philippines
10 Jul 12
You are an adult now therefore you have the right to tell her off... hmmm i do not know what my kids will feel when i do that as they are still young right now.. but now i know what NOT to do. But i also hated it when my own parents do that...
@NailTech (6874)
• United States
10 Jul 12
It is common sense to know the boundaries of your kids no matter how young or old. After awhile it is just disrespect, in my opinion. I have been there as an adult wit m,y mom. My dad will even say thank you to my brother for merely printing out his packages and won't say that to me after I do all the hard work of putting all his parcels up on eBay, the harder part of the job! Go figure. Then some people wonder why I think and say people are morons.
With my brother, here it's as if he has the temper so they leave him alone. Must be nice to be so freakin' angry that others will be afraid to confront you on anything. Grrr.
@Porcospino (31366)
• Denmark
13 Jul 12
My mother used to do the same thing while I was living at home. Sometimes I couldn't find some of my clothes and when I asked my mother if she had seen the clothes she said: "You never wear those clothes, and I gave them away to a friend who had a daughter about your age" That made me really angry. If I want to give some of my clothes away I will make the decisions, and I felt that my mother was invading my privacy. It is easy for me understand that you don't want your mother to go through your things and I think that her behavoir is wrong. I don't know what you can do about it. I don't know how many times I asked my own mother to leave my clothes alone, and it never made a difference. The only solution that I could suggest is a lock on the closet.
@bjc66bjc (6730)
• United States
10 Jul 12
WOW, Ricki Ricki, how on earth do you put up with your Mother
doing that...I have never heard of anything so crazy as you
can actually count your underwear and clothings..let alone
the the ones with tags, not worn...I thought at one time you
had a lock on your bedroom door...maybe I am wrong but its
certainly not bad suggestion...
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
10 Jul 12
Ricki is in her early 20's which places her mom at what?..in her 40's? It's pretty strange. I am tiny and could fit into my girls' clothes but seriously, my body at 56 is just not the same as it was when I was younger. I may wear the same size but their cute little clothes are NOT going to look so cute on me as they do them. e-gads! I can wear their jeans and all but I don't and would not wear the tops they wear even though they are adorable on them...would not be on me. And seriously...stealing someones underwear? ewww! If it were just the mom then I would say that the mom is maybe experiencing some sort of mental issue but it sounds as if the whole family is ....don't know the word. It's not good. Ricki should put as much money aside and start looking for a small little place of her own.
@SomeCowgirl (32191)
• United States
10 Jul 12
I have so much clothes but only wear about five or six things per season. By season I mean winter and summer, fall and spring gets put in with winter / summer. In any case, I have way too much clothes I know but I don't throw mine out.
No one has ever gone through and thrown any of mine out, and I doubt they would. Of course I'm told I need to downsize, but nothing is ever done. My family's a bunch of hoarders to be honest.
I'd tell your mom that they are your clothes, that you wear them all at some point, and that you aren't taking up much space with them as they are in your room, a room you pay for.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
12 Jul 12
I know that this might not at all be what you want to hear, but if your family is not giving you any kind of privacy and is telling you that you have too much stuff, it just might be time to consider getting a place of your own.
Now when I lived at home with my family, they were never invading our privacy, but they did like to not really allow us the kind of personal space that each and every person deserves to have in their life. Since we've been living in our own home, things have been a lot better for us.
