how can i prove to them that i get over him
By gerlieann
@gerlieann (73)
Philippines
July 19, 2012 9:49pm CST
My ex boyfriend got married already and honestly I'm happy for him and his wife. I'm glad that he found his true love and true happiness. Past few weeks ago a cousin of him visited me in my previous workplace and i have not seen her for sometime so i was so glad and excited. All of the sudden she told me why i did not fight for his cousin. I told her I'm happy for them and be it. Let just be happy for him also. Well, that conversation end up. After her finding out that i am working in that office some of my ex relatives also came to visit me. I appreciated so much the efforts and the thought that they still consider me as a family after what happen. But that things is i don't want them to keep on saying that they wanted me or how they wish we end up together and not his wife now. Ho i wish they wont say that anymore because they knew already that we are both happy with our own lives apart.
1 person likes this
10 responses
@MischiefFilledMe (268)
• United States
21 Jul 12
I've been dating my current boyfriend for almost four years (not including the three months we broke up for last fall/winter). Even though we weren't dating anymore at the time, his family sent me Christmas presents, and I still talked with his mom a lot. They liked me, and it didn't matter to him if I still communicated with them. (His mom has cancer that she's undergoing chemo for. If she wants to be my friend, obviously he's not going to stop her. Upsetting her isn't such a good thing right now.)
We've been back together since March (and we found out that I'm pregnant. =D), and I can only be thankful that his family wasn't like some of our friends about our breakup. A couple of his friends just totally blocked me out, and now they feel really awkward, because they don't know whether to apologize or what.
@gerlieann (73)
• Philippines
21 Jul 12
You are blessed with a baby because you are a kind person. You did not broke his mother's heart that is more than important than anything else. You are meant to be with each other I'm happy for you. Some of are friends also blocked me off because of our breakup but i don't mine either i just move on and live my life. You take care!
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
20 Jul 12
I guess as would everyone would want to think that people would fight for love even if it is not worth fighting for will be the best option but its not.. Sometimes letting go is always the best thing to do, but for me you don't owe everyone an understanding of how would you cope up and how will you be able to move on..
@gerlieann (73)
• Philippines
20 Jul 12
Maybe because we ca not tell what really happens in a relationship. As long as we are all happy and moving forwards that is what matters more.
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
21 Jul 12
I guess they only want to show that you are still a part of their family.
I have same experience like this.
Although it's not almost like yours.
My family had a family friend with a son whom my parents like so much.
And the guys family also likes me that much that we wanted us to get married- some kind of arranged marriage.
But I did not love the guy-although the guy loves me.
I married another man- and after 5 years the guy also get married.
Until now- the guys family and relatives still consider me as part of their family.
They shows too much care and love towards me.
Maybe its same like you ex's relatives.
They still want you to be a part of their family, not necessarily that they want you to be with your ex-.
They are just showing they like you that much.
@zhette4220 (181)
• Philippines
20 Jul 12
that's a big problem to you, to your ex, and to your ex's wife.If that continues, I mean his relatives to keep telling you that its you whom they wanted and not the other girl, a problem might possibly occur. I believe you have gotten over him. But if they wouldn't stop, your feelings might be struggling from what we so called "confusion". So, as long as you are still sure that you really have gotten over him, tell his relatives in a nice way that they too need to move on.
A heart to heart talk with them is what you need. Tell them what you actually feel.
gerlieann sis, goodluck and Godbless. Be happy enough that you are loved by your ex's relatives. That shows you've been a good partner, but you have to tell them you have your own life now separate from their brother..
@gerlieann (73)
• Philippines
20 Jul 12
Exactly,I just bear in mind that they treated me such way because i have been so good to them even after the break up because it does not mean that we are not together i will be mad at them also. It is just i wanted them to know that things is not the way it use to be.Don't worry I am no longer confuse with my feelings, I'm happy for him and his wife and that's it.
@Raine38 (12390)
• United States
20 Jul 12
Well, we can't really tell people what to do, much less what to think. So whenever they drop by to visit you and start on that again, just nod and smile. Say nothing. Because if you keep telling them to let it go, they might just interpret it and take it differently (oh she's really so nice and so forgiving, but I can sense by the tone of her voice that she still have something for the relationship). Just something for you to think on. At least when you don't say anything, you'll never be misquoted, right? Soon they will also get tired and they will get the message. For now, nod and smile. :)
@gerlieann (73)
• Philippines
20 Jul 12
That is a very good idea. I must do that again. Although I'm not explaining myself to them but they keep on mentioning it. From now on I will nod and just smile!
@gerlieann (73)
• Philippines
20 Jul 12
I think so, Or it's just that i have been so good to them that it's them who cant get over after what happen to us.
@simonelee (2715)
• China
21 Jul 12
Hello.You don't have to prove anything since it will naturally come out that you are indeed happy, either you are single or with someone. He's relatives are obviously the one who needs change. It is unfair to you and to your ex-boyfriend's wife that they want you over her. She's already part of the family so they should accept and learn to love her. They have to be be happy and respect his decision.
@astreadido (608)
• Philippines
20 Jul 12
If telling them don't suffice, you'll just have to show them that you're happy now. It doesn't matter if they believe you or not, it will show if your happy or not.
@missjahn (4574)
• Philippines
20 Jul 12
if your problem is to let them know that you are getting over him already, tough but not so. do not mind them for that reason, sometime soon it will just fade away as if nothing happened. the freshness of what had happened made them think and feel sorry for you. but as long as you are happy and you feel that for him, and you know that exactly, just laugh at the thought. do not force to much effort to prove them things were done to both of you. :0)
