HELP! My 8yo daughter is starting to have her Crush :/
By Ley
@dsw313 (320)
Philippines
July 27, 2012 3:07am CST
My 8 year-old daughter is now starting have her own crush, I don't know if she's just going with flow with her classmates, or really feeling something already... I know it is but just normal to have a crush, ( is it on an eight year old girl? ) But being a mother, I feel nervous and awkward about the situation.. :)
10 responses
@hunterdon (17)
• United States
27 Jul 12
I'm not looking forward to this with my daughter. We all want our daughters to remain our innocent little girls forever! But I had crushes on boys for as long as I can remember. Like my sister's neighbor friend when I was four! I remember my mom getting upset about me literally batting my eyelashes at him like I had seen on tv lol.
Even thought I never went through the "boys have cooties" stage, I was never boy crazy and I turned out just fine =) So I wouldn't worry too much that she's too young to have a crush. Just keep the line of communication open and talk to her about her feelings (don't discount them - give them credit. You want her to always talk to you about these things, not close you out!).
@dsw313 (320)
• Philippines
27 Jul 12
That's why I try my best this time to be open with my children about this matters, to be friends with them, someone they can trust into everything.. I never had that chance when I was a kid, my mom is very strict, we're always afraid of her and can't even open up problems, so I started to hide things from her and lead me on making mistakes in life, but I learned from it. I just don't want my daughter to experience what I have had.
@hunterdon (17)
• United States
2 Aug 12
That's what I'm afraid that my sister is doing with her kids - she's very strict. I don't think any of her kids (the oldest is 17) has even been on a sleepover or hosted one at their house. I'm afraid the girls are going to go wild when they go to college (if not before). I certainly can't imagine them going to her with any boy issues.
It sounds like you're doing the right thing by keeping her talking. Being a mom and a friend is a tough balance, but I think you're doing alright! We'll worry about our kids their entire lives - it's part of being a good mom =)
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
27 Jul 12
It is completely normal for children in your daughters age range to have crushes. In fact I have to admit that I am shocked that this is the first time that she has had a crush. My daughter was only five the first time she had a crush and she was also only five the first time that one of her classmates gave her a kiss.
That said, you really should not eorry about it because she is just a child and just like any crush, it will be over before you know it.
Just let it run its course and let her deal with it in her own way.
@mikyung (2232)
• Philippines
27 Jul 12
It's perfectly normal to feel about your daughter. Parenting as its best. I believe that you are there to guide and explain to her that everything is just the usual thing. I wish I could have a daughter soon, so as I can feel the things a parent is facing. Goodluck to you. Welcome to myLot.
@dsw313 (320)
• Philippines
27 Jul 12
Thank you! I also wish for you to have one soon, you can never express your feeling having a child of your own, whom you nurtured for 9 months inside you. As a mom, we are always over protective. I know this stage of her life is but normal, and I have to deal with it in a proper way she will understand. :)
@CollegeGirl92 (13)
• United States
28 Jul 12
A key to situations like these is COMMUNICATION.
She is young, but that is why you are there to guide her. Tell her right from wrong. Have play dates at your home and monitor her behavior. When she is around the age of 12, that is when it will get tough when she will be around more boys in school. Just communicate with her and guide her towards the right path. Also keep your daughter busy with school activities, sports, and having fun. It will deter her mind off from thinking of things like boys.
@dsw313 (320)
• Philippines
29 Jul 12
Thank you so much, really needed those stuffs to keep her busy, and I also remind her that she can trust me with everything and make her comfortable. I think that's the stage every mom feared about, to see her little darling angel growing up and having crushes to suitors. :-D
@ashya_32 (32)
• Philippines
3 Aug 12
its kinda shocking and alarming to a mother, i already have a 8 yrs old daughter but never heard talking about crushes, i don't know if she keeping it secretly, but maybe its normal, we need them to guide them and educated them that in their age never took crushes seriously.
@dsw313 (320)
• Philippines
3 Aug 12
yes, I agree with you, as a mom, you can't explain the feeling. :) I don't know if I am just being exaggerated or what because I too have my crushes when I am a kid. I just hid it from my mom because we are not allowed to that kind of conversation before (oldies :)) that's why I am trying my best to be as open minded as I can be and be someone my children can talk to regarding this one. :)
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
27 Jul 12
If I am in your position I would feel nervous too knowing that my daughter already has a crush,but then again she has to experience these awkward stage in her life, as for you I guess we can't do anythiing about it, but just dont forget to remind her about her priorities,just be there in every step of the way.. Remember that good guidance of parents always reflects on chid's behavior..
@dsw313 (320)
• Philippines
27 Jul 12
Yes, Thanks for that.. But as a mother it is really freaking me out! It is not the same thing when my son first told me that he's having a crush on school. Hehehe, you are right, we just have to explain to them everything and it is really normal to be on that situation. :)
@emdjay23 (1575)
• Philippines
27 Jul 12
If I am in your position I would feel nervous too knowing that my daughter already has a crush,but then again she has to experience these awkward stage in her life, as for you I guess we can't do anythiing about it, but just dont forget to remind her about her priorities,just be there in every step of the way.. Remember that good guidance of parents always reflects on chid's behavior..
@GemmaR (8517)
•
27 Jul 12
I think that it is perfectly normal for a girl of this age to start to realise that having different types of friendships with girls and boys is something that is completely normal. You shouldn't worry about her, because it's not likely to be a serious relationship at this point, and even if they decide to be boyfriend and girlfriend she will do no more than talk to the boy. Make sure that you let her know she can talk to you about anything that is bothering her, and this means that you should be able to keep things under control so that you feel more comfortable with it.
@dsw313 (320)
• Philippines
27 Jul 12
I make it a point to explain to her that it is normal to have a crush, but I also told her never to hide secrets about and we can talk about that matter, and I will never be mad as long as she'll be honest with me. I am just really over reacting because I know what teenagers do nowadays, and she is maybe 8yo but she looks like an 11yo girl. :)
@angelkarah050182 (4980)
• Philippines
27 Jul 12
Don't you worry a lot. Just try to talk to her about her crush. She might be only admiring that boy nowadays. I also had my crush when I was 7, a year younger than your daughter. I just had a crush on him and he didn't know about it til now. I just admired him because he was a bit timid but quite smart. Just ask your daughter what's she like about him. Try to befriend her so that she will be open to you and always update you about him. By then, you can advise her from time to time. Goodluck.
