i hate her for using my things
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
Philippines
July 29, 2012 1:34am CST
Hi mylotters,
I am so pissed off my niece who is living with us now
It's rainy season here so everyone at home has it's own umbrella I just bought mine a week ago and use it once this morning it was really raining hard and I suppose to go to my sister place as I was about to use my umbrella its gone so I ask my other niece who is living with us also if she use my umbrella she said no. Then I asked Mom is she use my umbrella she told me that she saw my other niece using it I was really pissed off by this I am not over reacting but she has a job why not to buy her own umbrella, she used my other umbrella before and I did not say any words to her even she ruin it.
She is using my blanket, my pillows, even she share room with me I don't complain about it I just want her to ask permission from me before using my things I am really fed up with this kind of attitude.
A week ago she even ate my buttered prawns
I am really mad cause sissy gave it to me and it's my favorite she don't even bother to ask is she can eat it I even hide it on the microwave but she was able to see it.
I am really pissed off with her.
I don't have a Great Sunday but I hope other mylotters have
happy mylotting
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6 people like this
17 responses
@lynboobsy11 (11343)
• Philippines
29 Jul 12
Talk to her dear, told her that your not selfish but there are things that we own personally and not all things are allowed to share. I have the same problem when I'm still living with the relatives of my ex they don't know how to respect things that not belong to them. It seems the things you have is also for them. This make ms angry too, I'm very organized and most of the time I don't like to borrow things from other that's why I bought things for my self. But when they already have it there is no chance that it will be back for me.![](/Content/images/emotes/angry.gif)
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1 person likes this
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@lynboobsy11 (11343)
• Philippines
29 Jul 12
Hide your things and don't give to her when she ask hahaha![](/Content/images/emotes/lol.gif)
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1 person likes this
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
29 Jul 12
or I will put big reminder
DON'T TOUCH MY THINGS OR I WILL BLOW YOUR HEAD OFF ![](/Content/images/emotes/rofl.gif)
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1 person likes this
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
29 Jul 12
hi lyn,
She already knows the Do's and Don'ts inside the house and already warned her about my stuff.
There is no problem sharing things with me but at least be sensitive to ask permission.
happy mylotting
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2 people like this
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@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
29 Jul 12
Maybe you spoiled her that's why.
Sometimes you have to be firm when asking a favor.
maybe she thinks it's just okay because you are her aunt-that's why.
Post a big REMINDER for rules and regulation ![](/Content/images/emotes/w00t.gif)
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@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
30 Jul 12
hi bhabycatch try this on her, "What do not you understand when I say No no?"![](/Content/images/emotes/lol.gif)
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@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
29 Jul 12
hi jai,
Nah I don't spoil her and there is no way I will spoil her.
I am her aunt but she must remember I am a lioness too I hate her I told her not to talk to me cause I am really pissed off.
She knows the house rules besides I already told her not to use my umbrella
miss yah
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1 person likes this
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@Jshean20 (14348)
• Canada
30 Jul 12
Sounds like she's becoming a little too comfortable with the living situation and taking advantage of the situation altogether. She may not even realize she's being disrespectful, I would kindly approach her about it. With the buttered prawns you can approach her in a way as if to say you had plans for those and now you have to make alternative arrangements, this might give her a hint. Good luck.
1 person likes this
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
30 Jul 12
hi Jshean,
She do this not just once and I already talk to her in a very calm way but she don't get it
thanks for the response
happy mylotting
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@salonga (27775)
• Philippines
30 Jul 12
How come that nice of yours is living with you? Why don't she live with her own family? I think she should start to move to her own home if she does not change her bad behavior. I myself would be so pissed off she is living with me. I'd surely tell straight to her face to keep her hands off from my belongings.![](/Content/images/emotes/cool.gif)
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1 person likes this
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
30 Jul 12
hi salonga,
Cause we are the closest relative she have here her mother was gone and we don' have idea where she is right now, her father is at province with her other siblings
I told her that if she will be like this she better look for other place to stay
thanks for the response
happy mylotting
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1 person likes this
@jazel_juan (15747)
• Philippines
30 Jul 12
one solution to that i guess, is tell her straight to her face that she needs to see the boundaries, the limitations...
1 person likes this
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
30 Jul 12
hi jazel,
I already did and before we accept her she knows our house rules
thanks for the response
happy mylotting
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@ShikiLuli (24)
•
30 Jul 12
I think, you need to talk to her regarding her attitude. You need to make her know about it and make her understand that that attitude is not right and something you don't like. You should open her eyes for her mistakes by confronting her in a mild manner....
1 person likes this
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
30 Jul 12
hi shikiluli,
Welcome to mylot
The problem is she doesn't want or can't understand
thanks for the response
happy mylotting
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1 person likes this
@beamer88 (4259)
• Philippines
29 Jul 12
Have you tried talking to her about it? Maybe she just isn't aware that you're not pleased with her using your stuff. She's younger than you, I assume, and by the way things are, I have this impression that she lacks a bit of maturity and sensitivity :) So I guess it's really up to you to let her know how you feel about her borrowing your things.
1 person likes this
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
29 Jul 12
hi beamer,
I already told her not to use my umbrella she is 2 years younger than me
We have house rules you must ask permission first if you want to use someone's things you are right she is lack of maturity and sensitivity.
thanks for the response
happy mylotting
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1 person likes this
@starsailover (7829)
• Mexico
30 Jul 12
Hi bhaby catch: I think this is a regular problem in almost every house. We find some family members that just don't respect your own things. They just take them without asking for your permission. It's simply bad
but at the same time we could discuss and probably create a bad environment or simply take the actions. When my uncle is in my house for example I know I have to let my room locked. He might feel angry the first time when he tried to enter my room but now he knows that I won't accept his bad attitude. I won't discuss to him because he is all grown up and he has decided to be that disrespectful and I can't change the fact that he is part of my family but I can take care of my things.
ALVARO
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1 person likes this
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
30 Jul 12
hi alvaro,
It's really hard to deal with this kind of relatives sometimes even how long your patience go it will come to the point you get piss off
thanks for the response
happy mylotting
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@mtrguanlao (5522)
• Philippines
29 Jul 12
Getting some of my stuffs without any permission can also pissed me off my friend especially if I reserve a favorite food of mine that I expect to eat later,lol!
Sometimes we need to be strict even if we love them,it's for the good of the relationship within our home. At home,they know what I like and don't so so far we're not getting any problems anymore,hehe!![](/Content/images/emotes/happy.gif)
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1 person likes this
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
29 Jul 12
hi mtr,
But there are people who is insensitive and doesn't follow house rules
I am pissed off with this kind of people unfortunately it's my niece who is one of them.
She really pissed me off
kisses to Crystal
happy mylotting
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@subhojit10 (7375)
• India
29 Jul 12
It is good to be possesive about things but sometimes this possesiveness takes the form of a dangerous consequences. We have to be cautious and aware of the things as well as of the people around us because people might be unknowingly hurt by our over possesiveness.
1 person likes this
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
29 Jul 12
hi subhojit,
I am not possessive one my point is she must know how to ask permission before using someone's thing. It's big deal for me cause this not just happened once and I told her not to use my umbrella when she asked me if that belongs to me.
thanks for the response
happy mylotting
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1 person likes this
@vidhyaprakash_2 (7116)
• India
29 Jul 12
Hi friend, sad to hear about this, why your niece is doing this kind of things? Does she know that you hate her activities, convey it to her in a kind way. Hope she will give up her activities after realizing this..
1 person likes this
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
29 Jul 12
hi vp,
She knows but she is just insensitive one that's why
thanks for the response
happy mylotting
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1 person likes this
@Raine38 (12250)
• United States
29 Jul 12
Respect begets respect. That goes for possessions, most importantly personal stuff. I respect other people's personal belongings, so in the same manner, I would also like them to respect mine. I can forego and forget an instance or two when they tried to use my possession without my knowledge. I can let one incident slip past, but she will hear from me, very calmly, that next time, it wouldn't hurt if she will tell the owner or ask her permission for its use. If it happens again, she will hear from me again, expressing my disappointment and that I am banning her from any of my stuff until she re-gains my trust again. Then I will keep my possessions under lock and key. This might seem too strict but I do not just get the money off the streets, I work hard to earn it so I can buy the things that I want for myself.
1 person likes this
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
29 Jul 12
hi Raine,
That's the problem with her she doesn't know how to ask permission but if someone use her thing she is getting mad.
thanks for the response
happy mylotting
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1 person likes this
@paulli3 (312)
• China
30 Jul 12
it's so terrible. but if you hate it, you can tell her that you hate her for using your things and let her not to use your things without your permission. you can talk the problem with her patiently and maybe you will get a way to solve it. it is not a big problem just you should get better communication, if your niece knows you hate someone using your things, maybe she won't do it again. so take a talk with her and tell her what you want.
1 person likes this
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
30 Jul 12
hi paulli,
this is not the first time I already told her not to touch my things but it seems she forgot it or maybe she is just hard headed one
thanks for the response
happy mylotting
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@moulee87 (320)
• India
16 Aug 12
Hi bhabycatch!
Really sad to read your situation. We come across many people in life! Some ask permission to the owner of the article before touching it. So don't ask permission before using it. Some are beyond this category. They don't ask permission to use others things and have fear of breaking it by improper use.
As you said, who ever it might be. Before using others things they need to ask permission. That is the descent way of using others thing. But very few follow this! Also you your nice is eating up all the dish that being prepared for you? Don't she get enough food at your home or she is just digesting what ever she get? What is the weight of your niece! I guess it should be 120+ kg!!! Just for fun Bhaby!
I have a sister at home. We both use our things (not all) without getting permission. If it is going to be personal. We need to wait! If we fail to do that, our day will go miserable by have a huge fight between us! So, I'm always cautious when using my sister's belonging which make me to do the same with the others too.
So what kind of guidelines you are going to create? So that your niece will not use your thing from now on?
Just make a friendly relationship with here and make her to understand that you don't like people using your things without your permission. That will be the best way to make her understand you and also a friend of you.
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
16 Aug 12
hi moulee,
Welcome to mylot,
Well we talked about it and I already told her about do's and don'ts inside the house and she must always remember that. When it comes to family I have a very long patience what we eat is what she eats it's just she is not satisfied maybe she is a thin woman.
thanks for the response
happy mylotting
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@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
3 Aug 12
Just treat her the same as she treats you.
It's what she understands. She takes something of yours so you take something of hers. She breaks something or loses it, you do the same.
If she complains, tell her you will stop taking her stuff when she stops taking hers.
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
3 Aug 12
hi MsTickle,
She already asked forgiveness but I clarify things to her so she won't do it again.
thanks for the response
happy mylotting
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@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
30 Jul 12
hi bhabycatch I understand completely because even if she is a relative that gives your niece no right to use your things.Being
'related or not, if something does not belong to you and you
wish to use it, in my opinion, you must ask the owner for\
permission. Eating your food also has no excuse as it did not
belong to her. You are right if she is w orking she can jolly
well buy her own umbrella. I know we all may get a little careless with close family, but really one should treat close family
with the same respect as you do your friends.That's really pushing the envelope in searching for your prawns and eating them. truly
I love prawns too and would be pissed off if someone ate my
prawns too.I had a great Sunday as my son came to visit with me
last night. try to have a better day now hugs from hatley
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@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
1 Aug 12
hi hatley,
I can forgive her about the prawns even it's my favorite but I am really pissed off cause it seems she is very comfortable doing such things.
I hope she will get what I am trying to tell her
thanks for the hugs
happy mylotting
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@CTHanum (8234)
• Malaysia
1 Aug 12
I will feel mad too if I am in your place bhaby. Why it's so hard for her to at least ask your permission before she take anything which not belong to her. I am not sure if she likes people do the same thing to her. Why she lie your things so much, sis??I wonder that.(^^)
@bhabycatch013 (9150)
• Philippines
3 Aug 12
hi sis,
She hates her other cousins for using her things before and I told her you don't want others to use your things but you are doing it to me.
But she already say sorry with a cake so she is forgiven,
happy mylotting
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