A disappointing meeting with an online friend

My experience was just the opposite. We too had exchanged emails before my inviting her to spend a couple of days with me. She came with her friend whom I was introduced to, the day they arrived. They came from the UK. To see them alighting at my gate was the most memorable moment for me. The two days we spent together were packed with activity. We had discussed this over emails and I knew what she would want to see. I hired a car and took them to all the places that they would enjoy. Our friendship is now bonded for good!

I'm actually in a purely online relationship right now. I haven't met up with him yet, but we've done as much as we could to find out if things would work out in real life before agreeing on the relationship- Skype calls, webcam chats, etcetera. We're acting pretty much the same on those as we do in real life and we get along just fine, so there shouldn't really be too much of a difference when we meet- It just means I can hug him more, haha. Perhaps it would be more prudent to always have at least a Skype conversation before meeting? Email does give you a lot of time to think over what you're saying.

A pleasant day Porcospino, With regard to your post, well, the only thing that I can somehow conclude is, maybe they are a bit shy to start the discussion personally. Although they already shared a lot of things thru mails but it will be a different story when you are talking to the personally. Often times your lips are sometimes sealed when you are facing the person and have all the guts when he/she is just talking over the phone or in mails.

This really amazes me. even after knowing each other for a lot of time and even after sharing a lot of things through the email. They are not getting along with each other well. What might be the problem with them? I can give only two reason for this kind of things. First one may be these two persons never tried to break the ice by talking each other about some topics in which both are comfirtable with each other. Second one myt be the IMAGE which they have shown in online is not real.

Well , I didn't experience that kind of thing, but I've heard a lot about that. You thought your netfriend is very handsome or beautiful, in fact, he or she is very ugly. You thought your netfriend is young like 20 or 30, even he or she signed that, but in fact , he or she is an old man or woman. Haha, it's interesting. You just can't believe anything on the internet. Most important of all, sometimes bad person will pretend goood person, and it's dangerous. Mums should tell their daughters about that.

Probably they have high expectation from each other but it wasn't met.

I've had similar things happen to me before. I haven't tried online dating for some years but there was a time when I use to. I know you are speaking of just friends. I arranged a date and when we met we didn't hit it off well. This happened twice well the first man I met was nice and friendly; we got along well but I was attracted to him at all. And there was a 2nd date with another man; I will call it the date from hell and the guy was a real jerk. I wasn't attracted to him either. I didn't see either one of them a 2nd time; anyhow I didn't want to. And I had some other experiences where we emailed back and forth allot and nothing came of it. About your story both persons need to make a real effort to reach out in friendship. If they hardly talked at all how would they get to know if they like each other. It all goes to show you won't really know if you like a person until you meet them in person. But if you don't spend any time talking to that person, You'll never know if you would have liked them or not. You have to be willing to give another person a chance.

I have not personally experience it. In my opinion some people are not good in self expression when face to face. They can express themselves well in writing, internet chat etc. It is really sad that the weekend did not turns out well. Hope their friendship can still be mend.

Sometimes it is very easy to express something through writing which becomes close to impossible to say face to face on first meeting. When I met my online friend it was like I met a stranger. We kept the meeting for very small duration. Because we discussed that it may be a little difficult to express face to face. But slowly as we started seeing each other frequently things became easy.

hi porcospino, Not all meeting are successful 5 years ago I met lot of girls through a social networking we are like a sister already one day I decided to meet them all it was successful we had fun and I really feel we are one family time pass nothing change then one day few of them don't one to communicate I don't have an idea I tried my best to communicate with them but it seems they don't want to. But there is one certain person who stick with me until now she is like a mom to me and we always had the best unexpected fun if we are together actually she is a mylotter too.... happy mylotting

With me, so far so good. I've met plenty of online friends all over the world and stayed with them. I went to Europe, Canada and US and thankfully we still got along really well like we do online. I've met some twice. I'd like to go again for a third time I love seeing them and hanging out. We have so much fun

How very disaapointing this must have been for your friend. OFten people make friends online, i know i find it easier to make frineds online as i am not always able to get out of my home for days at a time. I can imagine what a dissapointment this must have been. Like you explain, emails were exchanged and they seemed to get on really well. PErhaps the other person was not quite ebing themselves in the emails? I Dont know the reason for not getting along. But i can imagine how much of a dissapointment it must have been. I count myself very lucky when it comes to eeting people online. I met my current parnter through facebook. We made a comment on the same radio stations discussion. I thought we had the same views on this important topic, so sent her a friends request. We exchanged lots and lots of messages and chatted on facebook for some time, and everyone around us kept commenting on how well we were getting along, and i had a few private messages saying they could see us getting togaether one day as we got along that well. From there we exchanged phone numbers and sent each other endless text messages. when we did meet we hit it straight away, and it wasnt long before we were in a relationship together. two years later and we are engaged and getting married next year. so not all online meetings are disasters. I would just like to add though that i was VERY Cautious before I met this person,

I don't know exactly what's going on? Why are they not talking and everything. There could be lots of reasons why. Maybe physically they don't like each other or maybe they're not comfortable to talk to one another yet. They shared so many things through emails but perhaps they don't know yet the other side of the coin. It could be that one of them was not telling the truth about their selves. That is why expectations aren't met. It's so hard to tell because I really don't know the details. It's kind of weird when they couldn't get along with each other and to think they've been exchanging emails for a long time.

the problem is we usually expect too much from the point of view we have assumed from short conversation before.that is usually the trigger for disappointment.the fact is people will become a different person for certain situation.so,don't be too excited at the first so you'll be not really disappointed at the end.

Honestly I can almost see where this would happen. When writing an email we may be writing things to someone that we don't know, and in that email we may be saying things about ourselves we only WISH were true. Or maybe things that we think will impress the person. It might start off innocent at first, "only a few lies" you tell yourself, and then it just increases and increases from there. Years ago I used to be "penpals" with people via email and we'd write long emails and get to know each other. Some of the things I said were a bit "off" only because I was young and wasn't impressed with my living situation etc. Heck, I'm still not impressed but instead of lying I tell the honest to goodness truth. I hate that this happened to your friend and I wished that they still emailed. Maybe a mutual "I'm sorry" should have been said and then things get back on track. Just because you don't get along in real life doesn't mean you can't through email. Or it could have just been a bad time for the friend, who is to say? I'm sure the "mail" friend was anticipating and hoping for the best as well.

It's sad to know that the meeting didn't turn out good. I have online friends whom I met in person and I am glad that everyone are accommodating. I have set of online friend for more than 5 years now and the friendship still going on. Although I can say we lost contact with a few and new friends are added on the list.

We can never be sure. Some people ask someone else who can write to do the writing for them. In this case, the other person is actually corresponding with a different person. This happens a lot in our place because there are so many who cannot write.

Porcospino: Online friend becoming real friend in person -- it has happened in a few cases. It gave me a lot of satisfaction. Yes. This boy came online through my blog site -- I guided him for his recruitment. i was doing it last year when I was in usa. On my return to India last october-- he wanted to meet me and came in person all the way travelling 300 km from Bangalore. He said after getting appointment i may not be able to see you so he wanted to meet me in person. I went to the nearby bus stand brought him in my scooter to my home. he stayed with me for a day and then left. a very good boy. he is now clerk in IOB.

that was sad, maybe they are wishing that they never set up to meet at all. But in my case after meeting an online friend and we exchange gift to each other it turns out awesome we still exchange messages and a little chat after we see each other personally

I would never want to meet someone i met online. Not for a relationship anyway. I have asite online i chat with many, Id love to meet some of them. But as friends nothing more.