who should be more loving & thoughtful in a relationship, the man or the woman?
@churchill1980 (764)
Philippines
August 13, 2012 2:17am CST
i was watching a certain television show yesterday, it's a variety show where good singers in our country would show up on their talents. there's one part of the program wherein a group of singers would sing timely love songs and before they'll give their piece, they say something first about the song they are going to sing. there's this one singer who said "in a relationship, whether we like it or not, there is always someone who feels and gives more love and affection than the other. it is not bad, because it helps more the relationship to last. so that when the other is angry or doesn't feel good, that someone is always willing to listen and to understand, always willing to fight for the love." i tried to digest what she said, and i think, somehow she's right. i just wonder, in a relationship, who is the most who gives more the love and affection, and who is the one who just receive it most. is it the woman or the woman?
3 people like this
9 responses
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
13 Aug 12
I think in a healthy relationship, both must know when to yield and when to give more. I have always been examining my past relationships, and the mere fact that they ended shows that something was wrong there. I have come to realize that I was more of a giver and therefore, the guys in my life got it easy. It wasn't until I let go of the habit that I found the right one. Or perhaps it was just right timing.
Indeed there's no perfect formula for love. Have a great MyLot experience ahead!
@caopaopao (12395)
• China
13 Aug 12
I really agree with what you wrote. I think it's not healthy for a person who only gets but seldom gives, or who only gives but seldom gets. This kind of relationship can't last longer.
@churchill1980 (764)
• Philippines
13 Aug 12
You are right my dear, there is no perfect formula for love, we just have to enjoy it while it last. For me, I think we just need to give our best, but we should make sure that we are leaving something for our self. Because we never know what’s going to happen the day after tomorrow. The only constant thing in this world is change, we should guard our self from the pain of losing someone whom we are so attached to. I am glad that you realized your situation before it hurt you bad, it is really hard if you are most of the giver because your presence might be taken for granted most of the time.
I admire how my parents and other couple who have stay with each other for like 30 to 50 years. I could imagine how much they give in a relationship, for there is no such thing as perfect marriage, all have it’s flaws.
happy my lotting too!
@manduri20 (108)
• Uganda
13 Aug 12
i think it should be the same on both sides. i really believe that a man and woman should give the same everything in a relationship because a relationship is built with two people so they should both give the same love for it to last
@churchill1980 (764)
• Philippines
15 Aug 12
An ideal relationship is to be equal in love, but in reality it seldom happens. It is sad that most of the time, one gives more and the other just receives it without complimenting. There are exceptions of course, from this situation. Because there are still couples nowadays who gives and takes equally. But as long as the two persons in love are happy with what they have, I think that’s what really matters.
@bellis716 (4799)
• United States
15 Aug 12
Ideally, it is a 50/50 relationship, but nothing lives up to the ideal. kIn most good relationships, the pendulum swings back and forth, and partners do not keep score as to who is giving the most love and affection. They just give what is needed at the time.
@asliah (11137)
• Philippines
27 Oct 12
hi,
for me i think the more loving should be the man and the more thoughtful is the woman,i got that reason because in a relationship both of them should have give and take to each other so if the other one is loving the other one should be thoughtful or caring.
@benjhusay (11)
• Philippines
13 Aug 12
In my own opinion mostly the woman is just a receiver of affections and love. While the man is the giver. I think that's the proper way.
@churchill1980 (764)
• Philippines
13 Aug 12
i think what you said is the proper way. although most of the time, it's not how things work. the way i see it, most of the time, women re more affectionate and loving. i think it also goes with the personality and the character. but women are more expressive of how they feel, and therefore could easily show love to their partner. but there's always an exception because there are also guys who are affectionate and never fail to show how they feel for their partner.
@yuekim123 (161)
• Philippines
13 Aug 12
For me, it should be vice versa. There should be times that a woman must receive love the most and a man should give the most and the other way around. It is for the betterment of their relationship; they should complement but not really equal, it's impossible. Well then, have a nice day! :)
@churchill1980 (764)
• Philippines
14 Aug 12
i agree with you dear. an ideal relationship is a two way giving and receiving. there should be times when the woman/man, whoever realize his/her mistake should be the one to be humble. it's a compliment and act of love for your partner. although, there are times when both of you is on fire and would just burst out. it will be difficult, i experience it sometimes with my hubby, but thanks God he's willing to give way with my anger.
@CelticSoulSister (1640)
• Southend-On-Sea, England
14 Aug 12
I think it should be both equally, although men and women do tend to express their love and thoughtfulness in different ways to one another.
@sender621 (14894)
• United States
13 Aug 12
I believe it is the respomnsibility of both the man and the woman to be thoughtful and loving in a relationship. It should not fall to one persom. the man and the woman should be eual in a ll aspectd of the relationship for it to be a auccessful one,
@sweetloveforeve (13120)
• Portugal
13 Aug 12
i feel that she is right. sadly for me, everytime i liked a guy its me always the one that cares the most. and thats ok at first but in the end of the day, with time you wont feel happy. like me i cant take that anymore. i want to be the one being loved so much too. i always give all my love and care for boys but i always feel that they dont care enough. they dont show it. actually just right now i was
wondering how i could say that to a guy im starting to like. that im not happy that he says he likes me and dont show it. i think it depends of the boy and of the girl. but i think we girls care more about being cuddling and loved all the time. and for boys they dont need that we are all the time kissing or holding them. sure there are boys very caring ^^ but most part are not that sensitive 
