Taking care of our parents because we love them rather than as an obligation
By astreadido
@astreadido (608)
Philippines
August 13, 2012 3:11am CST
There is nothing wrong with taking care of your parents. My case here is when this responsibility is viewed as an obligation by the parent and was forced to the child or children. I believe that if a family is rooted in love for one another, there will be no need to obligate anyone. If the parents love their child or children, they will ensure the best possible support for them. This show of love will be reciprocated by the child or children as they grow up. There will be no need to obligate the child for future support. It will all be voluntary.
Being grateful to our parents will be most expressed when done out of love and respect to them and not because we have to. At the same time, a parent who does not obligate their child appreciates more whatever their child will do for them afterwards. In doing this, the child or children learns of this responsibility on his or her own with full acceptance and love. And this kind of love is something that will surely be passed on and shared with for generation to come thus binding the family more effectively than any obligation and responsibility.
3 people like this
9 responses
@kaka135 (14931)
• Malaysia
13 Aug 12
I agree with you. I think it's quite sad when someone take care of their parents just because it is an obligation, but not because of love. But I do think how the parents bring up the children. If the children were surrounded by love when they were young, they will love the parents too. Hence, I always think if a child doesn't want to take care of the parents, we can't always only blame the child, the root reason is most likely from the parents.
1 person likes this
@Fulltank (2882)
• Philippines
13 Aug 12
Its because its our culture. People living in the Western World have different cultures when it comes to taking care of their parents. Its not that they don't loved them, but simply its their culture that dictates they what to do. Here in our country, we had a very strong family oriented culture which if compared to the western world would only create a debate. A debate their we should be the ones who will take care of them or simply bring them to home for the aged.
@toyota4k (1208)
• Philippines
13 Aug 12
We can't judge by what we think about how love for parents in western countries is measured. We may not be justified by saying how strong our family ties are as when on the contrary incest would hit the headlines and extreme sibling rivalry, not including many more unreported cases. The Westerners may allow their parents to be confined in homes for the aged but that shows how they love them. They can't have them in their homes wherein they are left alone especially there, where nursing fee is expensive, however the rich who can afford employ their own nurses.
There are times when they are also taken home for the weekend. That's how it works and doesn't mean that one is cast of by their children when they find you in a home for the aged. In fact the few we have in our country finds the inmates more taken care of, than those in their homes who are actually more neglected.
@mensab (4200)
• Philippines
13 Aug 12
i agree with you that the parents should not impose any obligation on this. however, our parents are worried that we might forget to reciprocate. it is like a partner desiring a confirmation every now and then of the love of his/her partner. that's why we say "i love you" every now and then to our partner to affirm our commitment to one another.
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
13 Aug 12
It is consider as obligation and responsibility because talking care of our parents is a great responsibility that every children must participate.
I agree that it's not all about obligation and responsibility but LOVE.
Without love we cannot perform it well and everything we do will come out as plain forced obligation.
@ryanong (9665)
• Vietnam
13 Aug 12
In here parents will live with their kids when they are older. Children have to take responsibility to care their parents when they are old. It is culture and i like to to it also. it is the way to keep a strong relation in a family. Sometime it is a bit hard to live together with the old people but as children, we should not leave our parent living alone when they are old.
@iamJB7 (122)
• Philippines
13 Aug 12
I didn't think that loving them is an obligation..I love my parents so much. They're the best parents I have. It's by them that I struggled hard in order to provide them a better life..it's not because I'm obligated but because I love them so much that I have to sacrifice everything for them.
@angelkarah050182 (4980)
• Philippines
13 Aug 12
Our parents love us unconditionally. They did everything for us when we were young. When we grow older and they can't even do things on their own, we also have to take care of them. They let us experience love, happiness, success, etc. We owe our lives to them. In return, we have to let them feel love by taking good care of them whenthey are already old. Like what they did to us once. We were served, loved, and cherished. I hope in their remaining days here on earth, we have to serve them, love them and cherish them too. It's a give and take relationship. Happy mylotting!
@toyota4k (1208)
• Philippines
13 Aug 12
There is a story wherein a man was making a huge basket to put his father in and leave him by the road far off and away. Being a father himself the activity caught the curiosity of his son and asked what it was all about.
He explained that since Grandpa is now too old and of no use in the house other than just having be to fed and attended to all the time, he has to be gotten rid of.
His son nodded in amazement then asked for a favor saying, "Can you please return that basket of yours so that I won't bother to make one when you grow old and of no use to me anymore?"
@Axai2012 (371)
•
13 Aug 12
You and I, coming from a culture of having a close-knit family ties, I guess we never thought that taking care of parents and grandparents is an obligation. I don't think it's fair for any parent to think that their children are obligated to take care of them when they become older. I feel sorry for those children who consider taking care of parents as an obligation. It's a shame especially when we were raised with all the love. I think our parents deserve to be well taken care of at the time when they are unable to do it for themselves. After all, no matter how hard we try, we still cannot equal how much they have done for us.
