Ungratefulness of some friends

we have someone who is very mean towards us and when asked what the problem is they say we know. We have no clue which is the reason we asked. I know this person is mainly jealous of our family more then anything else. The worst thing is, they are family.

I've been going through situations like this all through school, and beyond. The strange thing is, most people DO outgrow this type of behavior, yet there are those that continue to thrive on such childish behavior, even through adulthood. Mostly they are the insecure ones; I try very hard to get away from their drama. And the ones that continued to exhibit this behavior as adults are the ones that I thought had grown up, but haven't themselves in reality. I choose to leave that drama behind, even if it means I lose additional friends.

You are not alone there. My neighbour who was also a friend, too me for granted. For almost 2 years, we have been going out and socialising together until, we hit a road block. I made a mistake on a monday. The only mistatke I made, I was thinking it was september and not august. I was thinking I had birthdays coming up one weeked. So thinking of doing the right thing, I would tell her that I would be clearing my schedule and I would let her know what I was doing when I hear from my sister. I got this message back, 'Ok, i'll find my way wished you told me earlier because made plans.' For that time we were going out, it was me or of recently my husband driving to the venues as she doesn't drive. So I started thinking that she assumed I was going with the part of the message, "wished you told me earlier because made plans" If I wasn't part of any plan of hers, then why would she tell me that she had plan. So I am thinking I was. In the mean time I sent a message back saying what an idiot I was thinking it was the wrong month. Then on thursday night, I received a text message for a birthday party on the weekend and I said something about getting the message. She eventually send me a message, "ok well,it goes like this I HAVNT HEARD FROM YOU ABOUT GOING OUT ONLY THAT ONCE TELLING ME YOUR NOT GOING BECAUSE YOU A BIRTHDAY (I understand that) SO I WENT WITH (NAME),NOW THE SECOND TIME WAS THE SAME BUT I ALREADY MADE PLANS----- I have been asked out for dinner and the person you WHO asked me you hate and dispise,so I DONT think it will go down well...." Then I replied, first of all it didn't make any sense. I was so angry. Why should I be available for her but I can't be available for my family. All this time we had checked if we were available to go out. But this time, she made plans with a person who irritated me and failed to at least check to see if I was going but throughout the message, I told her she should have checked with me to see if I was going to the same place in the first place. This is what I said at the end of the message when it was more understandable. "But as for us. If you wish for us to be back on the road, when you make plans and some how it involves me in what ever way, check with me first. You don't need to wait for me just because I've gone quiet. You do have a voice to speak with. Your have fingers to type with. LET ME KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!! Otherwise if you're not going to speak up things like this may and can happen again. As of the end of the month, so far it looks like i'm free. But I won't finalise any plans until I know for sure what is happening. I'll leave with you. If you don't agree with what I said, then I shal not bother you any more. If you think that my side does have some merrit and you do understand that you should have said some thing when you made plans then may be we can work on our communication, so did you know of your plans before monday, so why didn't you tell me if you did know before monday?" I haven't heard from her since and she has avoided me and it has been at least 5 days. It didn't bother me she made plans but if she expected that my husband or I was going to drive her without asking, she has another thing coming. And I didn't know of her plans until I spoke up first wanting to clear my schedule for the weekend. I will not be taken for granted. And the words she used, I felt she was ungrateful for what I have done for her. Was it really so hard for her to check and see if I was going socialise with her that night when she made plans to have dinner with a friend who irritated me? I just feel like allowing her now to make her own way. If any one gets a ride in my car or my husband kindly takes them, don't be so ungrateful as you're a guest in our cars. Never assume that we will be there for you all the time. I understand that every one of my friends have a life. I do feel that it is important to confirm everything from start to finish. If my frined couldn't find alternate arrangements, she would have had to cancel dinner. I hope she learns that she should confirm every detail of her plans. She took me for granted as was very ungrateful when I told her of my own plans. The situation did upset me.

Everyone nowadays want to stick to their plans and be on the safe zone,no one in the current world is so generous,all are selfish that is why they want to maintain welfare of themselves alone not others.so we have to keep working for ours,there is nothing called sacrifice and because of technology.... i believe it is becoming even more cruel and suppressive today right from classrooms to office

There are really friends for benefits only. It is easy to earn friends but true friends are hard to find and keep.

I can really relate to your discussion. Becasue of those type of people that became my friends before, I am really more cautious in making new ones. Making new friends is a big issue for me especially when some of them can't be trusted. So I always choose my friends in a way that I can see them, if can they be trusted or not. It's better to have few but true friends than having lots of them but some are just not real ones:)

I think when you have people in their lives you need to cut them loose. Lose them as friends. Because these types of people just bring you down. I think people get so used to something that they start taking it for granted. Maybe having a little time apart will make this person realize all that you do for him or her.

Hi friend, sad to hear about your situations, this kind of people are quite common in this modern days, it is really hard to find them, if some of your friends are in this sort, better to keep distance from them, don't worry for this kind of persons, they are not deserved for our tears

It is because of insecurities. There are best of friends who became enemies. They no longer fight for their friendship because of this insecurity.

To error is to human and the only way not to get hurt by the people that you love is to expect nothing from them. You can give only what you have and the way people are brought up determines how they relate with others and some people have so little to offer that it may come out as being selfish. Be the best friend that you can be and remember that it is more blessed to give than receive.