It's a mistake. Isn't?

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Actually, this discussion that I made right now is not really a discussion. It has something to do with a blog. I want to share a mistake that I've did. I'm such a fool. I don't know how to describe myself. I love someone that has been connected to my past, in exact my ex girlfriend. But I court a girl. This girl that suppose to love me with all of her heart but there's something in her that she keeps on hiding to. I'm such a bum and a stupid guy. Why do I need to court someone even though I know to myself that I still love my ex-girlfriend? I know that we still have a chance for reconciliation but then again, why do I need to do this? Why there are such people that's so afraid to be alone. If can do something to punish myself on what I did. Now, should I take the consequence that I can't turn things back on the same track. But I'm still positive that I can change for her. I can do all for her. I can do everything what she want. I'm only a human and I can commit mistakes. I should learn on this thing that I did. :'( blame it all on me.