Am I too bad?
By chentunacao
@chentunacao (309)
Philippines
August 29, 2012 4:15am CST
I came from a broken family. I grew up with my grand dad. I stayed at my father's place for just about a year. I visited my mom sometimes when I was in high school and can never be with her as much as I want. And seldom see both of them since I was in college up to present. And they don't make an effort to see me either. The longer the years that I was away from them the more I get used to live without them. I don't even miss them. And the worst feeling I am having for a long time is that, " There's no place in this world I can call home". What is your opinion about this?
5 responses
@blademaiden (734)
• Romania
29 Aug 12
It's depressing to feel that you don't belong anywhere and that you don't own anything. Not having parents or having parents who don't care about you, make you a vulnerable and unsecure person. Being forced to grow up without parents it's very difficult and this surely has a great impact on the way you see things.
@chentunacao (309)
• Philippines
29 Aug 12
I'm sorry if it sounds like what you thought about. My mom left me and my dad when I was 1 year old. Before mom left us, dad met an accident and it leads to amputation of his leg. That's why I grew up with my grandfather for me to be properly taken cared of. Dad can't do it because of his condition. When I was 6 yrs old mom came back but I'm still with my grandfather (only mom and dad were together) but after 4 years she left again. She has a new family now. I know they still cared about me but if I won't visit them both I can't see them. Because I'm living quiet far from their places. But even when I'm still in college, I have in my mind that only if grandfather was still alive he won't allow not seeing me for years. He would surely send me money for transportation so I can come home and he could see me.But my parents were not like that. We don't even have a house of our own, that's why I am forced to stay at my aunt's house where I can't find love and belongingness.
@SusanLee (1920)
• United States
29 Aug 12
I came from a broken family too. My dad was in the military, we moved a lot. They divorced and then we moved from here to there living with one and then the other.
I also stayed with my grandmother off and on. Just guessing I'd say you were in your early 20s. I looked at your profile but it didn't give that information.
What kind of relationship did you have with your grand-dad? I think home is where you feel warm, safe, secure and loved. If you didn't have that with your grandfather then you'll be able to create it when you marry and start a family of your own.
You're not bad and you're not alone. There are many people that feel the same way.
Just make sure that when you do marry they have some of the same goals as you.
@silverfox09 (4708)
• United States
2 Sep 12
I had similar experience but it was at the earlier part of my life when I was about 2-5 I live with my grand parents, I dont remember much about it . You will be ok and you made your peace with the pass that is the best thing .
@marguicha (222989)
• Chile
4 Sep 12
You wrote a similar post about this. It seems that you are old enough to try to make your own life now and be happy instead of blaming your problems on your childhood. You had your granfather and other people of your family. Other children have nothing.
@toniganzon (72281)
• Philippines
29 Aug 12
That is so sad. I don't blame you for not having that attachment to your parents. Like what they say, children can never choose who their parents are. We don't have a choice but to call them our parents only by name, but they never were a parent to you.
I just hope you continue to be a strong person and succeed in life even without them.
