Finding yourself

I have heard this too several times and can't figure out what the heck they are looking for? Themselves? That seems strange. I know my daughter in law soon to be ex daughter in law is finding herself...she is so unhappy...but that is her own fault. Happiness comes from within....in in other people or things or places.

There are plenty of reasons why I would give up everything (we never give up everything btw) to find myself. Sounds to me your identity is the one of being a wife, member of a family, employee and ... To plenty of us that is not enough. We need to be us, a person, not someone's mother, someone's wife, someone's employee. Not the product of how we are raised or pushed into the same cabin like others. Every human being is a individual, a person with his/her own ideas, view on life, needs, goals. If you are raised to be always there for others there is a big lack of time to be you. You might call it an ID-crise or whatever you like. But if you believe it or not: it is important to know who you really are, since the day will come you don't have a carreer anymore (and you will be replaced and nobody will miss you), your kids will leave the house, your family and husband will not be there anymore. If it comes to that all you are past. Do you know who you are without a carreer, a family, kids, friends, neighbours? What is left over from you if that all is gone?

i think it basically means to identify ourself and keep a trademark figure like achieving something,but that is real pressure being enforced,i am against it

I think the people who do this are either so self centered that they cannot see beyond the "it's all about me" syndrome or that they are mentally and emotionally exhausted and do not see that they have any other choices. Its like that are hanging on by their least emotional thread and they just do not know what else to do.

Every time I hear this I just shake my head. I don't understand it. If you're stressed out about something, then just say that. Don't go into this whole "I need to find myself" spiel, especially if you're 3 years into your career and have like 3 kids already. If that's how you feel, then you shouldn't have started a family with anyone, let alone settled down if you were still "unsure" of who you are as a person.. To me, that just sounds like an excuse you're throwing out.. Otherwise, I really don't have a reason as to why people would give up everything and say that.

You find yourself during your life experiences. you dont need to give up everything to find yourself. its completely nonsense.

I guess that if a person with family, children and career that hasn´t found her or himself will never do it. Where would they think they will find anything if they are evading their reality? What is it they have to find? I´d send the seekers to a shrink. Truth be said, I say to muself once in a while "what will I I be when I grow up?", when at 67 years of age and a lymphoma that will cut earlier my life I suppose (who knows) there´s not much to grow up. But we all want to change things a bit within out limitations or to explore new paths. But none of that means throwing away all we are. That´s sick.

I think when we need to accomplish something to find ourselves it's because we didn't know what we were capable of doing. Now to find our real self I think specially for girls we shouldn't loose virginity so soon, the girl must be secure of herself and not so young so she doesn't value herself according to the first guy on her life, she should wait until to be sure before getting married, not because of age or something. I think when a woman is true to herself she can find herself easily enough, now when we listen to others, as society says that we are: daughters mothers career women and if we are not none of that we are worthless, then we can't find who we are either. There are plenny of stressed women that I suspect didn't actually wanted to become mothers and their kids suffer for example.

Actually, i have done that 5 years ago. i had to leave the house to have sone spave. it wasn' t easy but i just needed a breather. if i didn't do it, i don't think i have remained in my marriage.

I'm agree on you and it's trus that our family and career had made ourselves, so i do not want to spend time figure out or do whatever things to make me change. I'm enjoying what i have now and it's completely life i wanna process. Enjoy.

it's nice when you look yourself and manage to find it. however, because it is easy to nd someone and listen and tell him what to do to give advice but most importantly you where and how you would have done so find yourself a friend you know who you are why you are here on earth and what is your mission . success with demand.