To keep or not

@kris3rdE (156)
Philippines
September 10, 2012 12:44pm CST
What if you thought of someone as your friend but soon realized that she's not? What's the best way to stay away from the person without offending her?
6 responses
@kongno (431)
• Philippines
11 Sep 12
i can't hardly say something about your situation here because i don't know the reason why you realized that your former friend is not your friend anymore... but what ever reason it is if it is really hard to avoid her limit the conversation until she sense that you are no longer interested in your friendship,...
@kris3rdE (156)
• Philippines
11 Sep 12
I found out that she gossip about me when I'm not around. I had personal problem and I asked for her help thinking that she's a friend. I was surprised that most of our co workers learned what happened and it was through her. It hurts because I trusted her.
@kongno (431)
• Philippines
12 Sep 12
if i were you i will not consider this kind of person as a friend, but to avoid offending her you can still talk to her in a casual manner, when she ask something about your personal life you may answer her the word "secret" in a somehow joking manner to to avoid her invading your personal life again and at the same time not to offend her, with that kind of conversation i think she wont be interested in talking with you anymore, she might as well be the one to avoid you, hope this helps.
@hestylim (1210)
• Indonesia
10 Sep 12
Just avoiding her, and at the end she will know. That's what I always do. I am not good at talking about my feelings. So I choose to avoid people I want to avoid. Good luck
@Raine38 (12250)
• United States
10 Sep 12
I agree, just avoid hanging out with her, limit the phone calls, feign being busy. Soon she will eventually get the message. It may not bring immediate results like you wanted but at least you can prevent directly hurting her feelings when you tell it directly to her.
@kris3rdE (156)
• Philippines
10 Sep 12
Thanks. However, we work in the same place and most of the time she drop by to my station and wait for me. It will be a little hard for me to avoid her. Help I really don't know what to do.
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
10 Sep 12
Avoid the person. Maybe not too abrupt but showing coldness will slowly make the relationship drift away. It's not easy to get rid of a person once we consider a friend, but it has to be done. It's not worth keeping someone who is not a real friend in the essence.
@kris3rdE (156)
• Philippines
11 Sep 12
Thanks and you are correct. I don't like to do this to her but i'm no longer comfortable when she's around. I'll show coldness to her the next time she drop by. Hope that she get the message.
@blinjk (617)
• United States
10 Sep 12
I have also a friend that pisses me off and what I do is that since she is far away from my home. I just ignore her calls and messages and I cannot say that I really do not like her because I know she will be offended and would talk about me if I will be honest to her. She is a talkative type so I just reply to her messages when I am in the mood but I often ignore her.Well,if you really want to stay away from your friend you could be honest or just ignore or avoid her.We cannot stop her from being offended but if you see her just talk to her or say hi.
@kris3rdE (156)
• Philippines
11 Sep 12
I do ignore her calls and messages. I just can't avoid her when we're in the office. I'll just try to be cold to her and she might get the message. Thanks
@nhieleiko (109)
• Philippines
11 Sep 12
I am currently experiencing that situation right now. I don't know what to do so i decided to tell him that I am now busy with my photography stuff. So, i think he did not take it negatively. He understood and said that he too should find enough interest to buy him some time.
@kris3rdE (156)
• Philippines
11 Sep 12
That's a good way to avoid a person without offending. Thanks
11 Sep 12
It's entirely up to you who keep as your friends. If you can't be sincere to her because she isn't to you to start with, then there's no point in involving yourself in friendship with her. Just avoid hanging out with her.
@kris3rdE (156)
• Philippines
11 Sep 12
You are absolutely correct! Thanks.