how to deal with a mistress?

I would never judge a person's character just because she is a mistress. Not unless it's a hobby of her to destroy other people's family all the time. Mistresses have their own reasons why they get into such a relationship. In fact it might not even be their fault all the time. Why blame it on the mistress alone when the husband also participated in it? It takes two to tango after all.

There's nothing wrong with mingling with a mistress. They're humans too, maybe flawed in judgment but everybody deserves to be treated equally. Falling in love with a married man sometimes can't be avoided, things like this happen in the most unexpected way, but choosing to stay and break a family apart is not acceptable.

Well, my mother was a mistress. You cannot avoid them because there are many women out there who are or have been mistresses. You could be talking to a mistress, but she will never tell you that she is one. They aren't bad women. They don't often intend on being a mistress in the first place. Their plan wasn't or isn't to "break up" a marriage. My mother never wanted it to happen to her, and it was my step-father who pursued my mother. My mom decided to get with him because she wanted children, one boy and one girl. My mom got one girl and one boy in that order, by two different men. Again, her intent was not to break up a marriage, she just wanted children. She didn't even think that she could get pregnant at first. My mother is NOT a bad woman, but she did make some questionable choices. I have never been a mistress, and I never want to be one. I have a boyfriend currently, who is younger than me, and I much like it this way. I never want to be anyone's second, and I want to be their one and only.

It is not an easy situation when you're the mistress because everyone will brand you as the bad one. A mistress is supposed to be a husband snatcher, so what good will that make you? She is also called a home-wrecker and that's one label you don't want to have. A mistress is the cause of a family's disintegration or falling apart.As much as possible women should check and double the background of men who may cheat them or lie to them about their true status.

At the risk of sounding very odd, my husband is allowed to have a mistress should he so choose to and does in fact have one. I get along with her really well and we are like the best of friends. She understand that should she want more from my husband that he will no longer have her as a mistress since he doesn't want to spend his life with any woman but me. There is nothing keeping her being his mistress if she finds someone special. She has already asked me to be the maid of honor if she does find someone to marry. That being said, I have a girlfriend. In my personal case, my husband and I do have an open relationship in which our rules are never to lie to each other and we don't believe in divorce. They don't come around the children often and when they do, they are friends like the numerous other friends we have. Once the children are asleep in bed, then that is adult time. Now overall, most mistresses have no idea they are mistresses and I would never judge them. I wouldn't judge the ones that were otherwise I'd be a hypocrite within my own situation. I do not think anyone should avoid them, they are people too. I have been a mistress before to a wonderful female friend and I was friends with her, her husband, and even babysat their kids for them from time to time before I had children or got married. So I could accept it and I don't think they are bad people. I do however fully believe that a person keeping a mistress in which the mistress has no idea is the victim of a horrible horrible person who is playing with their feelings. I hate when there is no honesty in a relationship. It hurts the woman who thought the man was single and was falling for him. Those men are nothing more than dirt in my eyes.

I'll answer your questions - I met a mistress. My uncle and friends had mistress in their lives. - I can be friends with a mistress, get to know her and later understand her reasons. - We'll I guess not all of them are bad. - I never been and never will be a mistress. I'm sorry to hear that you were fooled by your EX. Some guys are doing that to get themselves into another relationship. There's nothing wrong if you fell in love to a married man, since you didn't know about it. It will be wrong if you continue your relationship with him after you found out the truth about him.

It is important not to beat up yourself here when you are in the dark of your ex partner's marital status. No matter what others may want to say or even call you, I believe the truth will be out with time, provided you've walked away and keep your distance from him. As a person, we must have self respect and be conscious with our principle, so when we come to life's crossroads like this, you will not be affected and easily moved by irrelevant outside factors. Remember, when you walk in the dark with a light, you will never tripped and fall.

Love is very complicated. It's not your fault that you didn't know your ex partner already has a wife and a baby. There are many guys out there who trick girls. Sometimes, it all depends on the situation. If that person who is the mistress already knows about the family of the guy, then that is something I wouldn't want to associate with. That person is wicked enough to ruin somebody else's family. Just think about the wife and the children. If I am to put in their situation, I wouldn't be able to forgive my father and his mistress for hurting my mom. I'm not blaming you. You are a victim of that man.

My husband had a mistress once. It took a while for me to forgive. If she hates you, its because of the feeling of betrayal. It takes years to build trust and seconds to destroy it. In my case, it was difficult for me to deal with his mistress because the girl, although she knew that he was married was very persistent. In your case, you didn't know. That's a different thing. You were a victim. Forgive yourself and move on. The people around you may tell you otherwise but you know better. It was an honest mistake that can be healed with time.

just take her into confidence and take straight to her without any shyness and always try to comfort her for sure

It's not clear for me whom we call mistress exactly. I thought it's a woman who is lover of a married man to get money from him. I think you were not a mistress because you didn't even know that this man was married, it was not your fault because he was hiding his family from you. I think many of us avoid getting closer to someone if we know that he is married, although not everybody is able to fight with her emotions. I feel a bit strange about women who do this because they want the man's money, but I think some of them are trapped in their emotions and don't know what they are doing.

hi, your case is different because you did not know it and he has cheated you. I don't think I regard it as mistress. But yes when it comes to mistress who intentionally grab married man and want to suck on the money and everything and they have bad motives, I would not be friends with them. To tell you the truth, i have very less friends. All my husband's friends are now my friends because I am new to this place and i have kept myself reserved and I would not like to make friends with girls here because they are not like me. I am kool. Thanks for sharing and have a wonderful day ahead.

While I am not the type who's so quick to judge people, I am not a big fan of mistresses. My dad had one when we were still young and I have to admit that the ones affected the most are the children. If they did not know at first that the guy they've been with is already married, like in your case, the right thing to do is to cease seeing the guy. I'm sure that if ever she's in the position of the legal wife, she wouldn't want that to happen to her as well, just in case the situation is reversed. it is wrong and no amount of justification will ever make it right. I would still rather listen to someone who's got nice things to say than waste my time hating someone I don't even know. But if most mistresses are like the ones that I see, who are even more fierce than the legal wife, then you cannot blame me if I look at them differently.

For me,mistress are humans and they should be treated like humans.It depends on people if they will avoid them or not.I also have a friend that has been a mistress and she is just following her heart.No woman would not really want to be a mistress.We cannot blame them from falling in love.

Well I treat them just the same as anyone else. But I hope it she's not a mistress of my family member though. I think not all mistresses are bad specially if the case is like yours wherein you don't have any clue that you were one. We should not judge someone so quickly without knowing their side. :)

Hi friend, i am not interested in mistress and don't have any ideas about them. I have a loving wife and kids and spending my life with them. Sad to hear that your ex hide all his information to you, are you still having contacts with him?