how do you if it's real love?
By eirene93
@eirene93 (79)
October 1, 2012 2:08am CST
The moment you set your eyes on the boy or girl of your dreams. Suddenly you're smitten, and nothing else matters. You're hopelessly in love. or are you? is it love?--or is it infatuation? how can you tell?
the real qouestion is--How do you know if it's real love??
1 person likes this
10 responses
@chentunacao (309)
• Philippines
1 Oct 12
It is real love when you know the flaws of that person but still accept it without wanting her/him to change. It's real love when you are willing to sacrifice. It's real love when at times you forget about yourself and only think of the one you love's happiness. It'd real love when you can forgive.
@eirene93 (79)
•
1 Oct 12
So your saying love is not selfish, it is not self-centered. yeah, your right! and you're also saying that love is not finding perfection instead accepting the ones imperfection. it made sense Chen! what about infatuation chen? anything you can say about it?
@chentunacao (309)
• Philippines
1 Oct 12
Infatuation is just like "puppy love". Plainly attraction with the positive things that the person has. It will never last, it is changeable, now you like her/him then you don't. Infatuation can't stand through the test, you can just easily give up when everything went wrong. And the worst thing about infatuation is when the attraction gone away you would ask yourself... why have I liked that kind of person?
@lynnes75 (443)
• Malaysia
1 Oct 12
To me, real love is when I want to spend the rest of my life with that guy, and even to build a home and a family with him. I've known a few guys who were my boyfriends (not all at the same time, mind you, lol) but I never wanted to marry any of them or have a family with them. So when I met this one guy who changes everything about what I want in life, then I know he's the one for me.
@lynnes75 (443)
• Malaysia
3 Oct 12
Exactly! Some girls I knew married because they were pressured either by their family or their own beliefs. ie. the y're afraid they'll never find a guy, or that a girl's ultimate success is to marry and have kids; as a result, most of them are discontent and a few left their husbands etc. So this discussion is actually good, lyn-lyn, maybe we can share this with others in real life too ;)
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
5 Oct 12
Every person feels different from one another.
Nothing is specific how to identify if the feeling is true love or not.
Only you and you alone can detect and prove if it is true love or you find the right person.
It takes time, therefore, give yourself more time to know the person and let the feeling grow deeper.
@eirene93 (79)
•
8 Oct 12
i agree what you have said Jai..!!
but i know you agree too that aside of our "own self" ,also, the "bible" principle about love can tell too if its true love or not.
but anyway your right it takes time. it is not instant.
it takes so many years to find out what true love is..
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
2 Oct 12
I think that if a person has only seen a person, or hasn't spent a lot of time with that individual it's infatuation. As they start to get to know one another better and spend more time together then it grows into love. But there are a lot of people who start off infatuated with someone. It's takes time for love to grow.
@Dominique25 (9464)
• United States
3 Oct 12
Yes it takes work. Couples who stick it out through the good and bad times come to understand and appreciate this. It is harder for young ones to see what is really involved in making a relationship work. It takes effort and commitment on both parts.
@eirene93 (79)
•
3 Oct 12
I see.. So, you mean you have to know the person first and then you can develop love if you know he/she is good enough. well, you have a point dominique, love just don't occur in a simple love at first sight it must be develop and cultivate. it needs a long period of time.And it's not that kind of easy.
1 person likes this
@crimsonose80 (283)
• Canada
2 Oct 12
First, you feel infatuation in the beginning of relationship.it's the stage where you eyes feel blinded by that person..Some times people refer to this as "puppy-love; but this feeling is only temporary..People get their meaning mix up..
It is real love when you can accept him for who he is and along with his/her flaws and love doesn't usually happen right away..You have to build on it and it is also learning about each other all the time. You know that it is real love when you're willing to sacrifice your own happiness for his/her happiness. Also, when you can see yourself spending your lifetime with the other..
@eirene93 (79)
•
3 Oct 12
Ok,then. Infatuation really normally occur at teenage stage. it's like only a "crush" for someone and then it fades... you just like the person because he/she has a cute face, sexy body, nice smile etc. but not seeing her/his inner personality.. while real love accepts flaws and weaknesses of yours. knows who you really are inside and out. who is willing to sacrifice just to see you happy even though it hurts.
woah..!! love is really really a serious thing..
@mydanods (6513)
• Nigeria
3 Oct 12
you know it's real love when you can throw away your box of chocolates and give it up for a year just because she asked you.
It's real love when you spend nights wondering why she is not posting on facebook like before, so you subscribed to her lists and subscribed to her posts and subscribed to her tags and subscribed to groups, on facebook. Some authority said you could fall into the mistake of stalking; but it's real love when there is already one brick-and-mortar...
@eirene93 (79)
•
3 Oct 12
you know what mydanods? am literally relates what you have said.. i've tried stalking at my early age because i do like this guy.. up until now i still like him.but i didn't stalk him anymore. but we're texting a lot of times.it's been 5 years now and the feelings are still there.. i've tried my very best to forget this guy but it didn't work..
@rog0322 (2829)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
1 Oct 12
Hi,
It only shows in time and space: as time goes by and as you go farther apart and the feeling is still there, then its love. If it passes by like a shadow in the night, then its infatuation.
Only time and space can really tell and no other.
@jknirdhan (50)
• India
1 Oct 12
Love is a lot of things and its a very personal thing...for me, love is being able to put someone elses needs before mine, wanting to see someone happy even if it means this person is not with me. Its wanting the best for someone regardless the situation and circumstance...
@jatinderdhiman (3)
• India
1 Oct 12
Hi eirene93,
The moment you set you eyes on the boy or girl of your dreams is love for you but not for his/her until unless you did not let him/her know about the feelings in your heart. Its real love from your end but i think to expecting the same from his/her can be possible after proposing him/her and let him/her know the feelings.
@eirene93 (79)
•
3 Oct 12
i did it to a boy once. i told him--i love him. i know it's kinda awkward coz am a girl but please don't judge me right away. it's kinda looong story. but when the moment i told him i love him, he just said 'thank you for loving me'.. is that mean he really doesn't love me at all??
