It's not my fault.

United States
October 3, 2012 8:45am CST
A friend of mine posted a video this morning on Facebook of an overweight news anchor responding to an e-mail she received accusing her of being a bad role model because of the fact that she is overweight. Her response was great and basically turned it into a lesson about bullying and she reached out to those who are bullied to let them know they're not alone. Here's the link to the video if you want to see it: http://www.upworthy.com/bully-calls-news-anchor-fat-news-anchor-destroys-him-on-live-tv?g=2 Watching this video started a fire in me. Not really about the bullying. I'm totally against bullying and the person who wrote this woman an e-mail is a total moron! But here's the problem.. the person who wrote the e-mail is on the "Let's get rid of obesity" bandwagon. Yes I realize obesity is a problem in our country.. but let's look at the facts. Children don't choose to be obese.. so what's causing childhood obesity? From what I've seen everyone is trying to blame it on the schools. Schools don't serve healthy enough lunches, schools don't allow enough playtime. BULL$HIT! It's the parents. Parents feed their children cr@p and don't sit there and fight with the child to eat their veggies and allow the children to be stuck on a video game all hours of the day and night instead of going outside to play. Who's fault is it that adults are overweight? The media says it's McDonald's fault and other fast food places for serving oversized portions and fat filled junk. Here in NY state they've put a ban on sodas at fast food places due to sugar content. Ok, well I don't know about you, but I've never in my life had a fast food place shove food down my throat. I've never gone to the store intending on buying healthy foods and having it all replaced with junk magically. Nobody has ever glued my rear end to a chair forcing me to sit instead of getting up and doing something. No.. we choose to eat fast food. We choose to eat large portions. We choose to drink soda and other cr@p. We choose to sit on our butts. The problem is everyone wants someone else to blame, and a quick fix to the problem. If I'm overweight I can blame McDonald's for making me that way.. I have no fault what so ever in being overweight. I smoke because I saw commercials on TV that made it look cool. My kids are failing school because teachers aren't doing their jobs. My marriage is falling apart because of the fact that gays are allowed to marry (I don't understand that one a bit!!). I'm broke because the president personally removed any possible job I could get from the area so I'm stuck sitting on my butt doing nothing with my life and accepting government funding paid by tax payers who've worked their whole lives and have more money than me which they shouldn't be entitled to. When are we going to start taking responsibility for our own actions? We are overweight because we choose to eat junk and not exercise enough. Some are overweight due to genetics, meds, or other factors but the majority of us are overweight due to our own choices. We smoke because we chose to start at one point and haven't chosen to stop yet. This isn't a disease and we can't expect someone to give us a magic pill that makes us stop. Quitting is hard work, I've done it before. It's not easy, but then again most things in life aren't easy. The problem is most people no longer want to do anything considered difficult and quitting any drug is difficult. We drink because we choose to. See above. Our kids are failing because we're not doing anything about it like following up to make sure homework is done and speaking to the teachers to see what areas our kids need help and finding ways to help them at home (I'm sorry but you can't expect the schools to do EVERYTHING for your child.. they have other kids to worry about and some of those kids are smart and don't want to be held back by those who don't catch on as quickly, that's why it's up to parents to give extra help at home when the child needs it). BTW- This in no way pertains to special needs children. This is directed towards children who could pass if they put forth the extra effort that isn't being put forth. I understand some parents do everything they can and the child still fails.. this is just a general statement. Marriages fail because you're not putting time and effort into it and you're making bad choices such as cheating, lying, or whatever else, or it just didn't work out and there's really no one or nothing to blame.. this happens. Why anyone wants to say that gay marriage has demoralized marriage is beyond me. Please give me one example of how a gay marriage has affected your life on any level, unless you are related to that gay person.. in which case you have every right to an opinion on the matter. If you're not gay and aren't closely associated with any gays, what right do you have to make a decision for them? You're broke because you can't get off your butt and find A JOB! Any job is better than no job, but since you're sitting at home and earning unemployment you think it's pointless to go find a job unless it pays great.. well what are you going to do when everyone else gets that mentality and nobody is working anymore to pay the unemployment benefits? Point is, your problems are nobody's but your own! Why do people insist on blaming someone or something else for their problems? I'll never understand! Ok.. down off my soapbox now.
2 people like this
8 responses
@Dianax3 (48)
• United States
3 Oct 12
I completely agree with you. I had to read all that you wrote it was alot but wow ytou are on target you should be a journalist haha with all that passion. I do get very annoyed when people blame it on other people when in fact it is their fault they could do something about but chose not to. And the media rather make them feel like its not their faults which isnt helping at all. once people can take accountablity for their actions that when they fix the problems they are facing
1 person likes this
• United States
3 Oct 12
Thank you! I can't be a journalist because I don't like criticism. I was worried I'd get a lot of negative feedback for this discussion.. but so far so good. It's not just the media but the government too. The fact that they're making these petty problems into big issues. I think there are bigger problems they can focus their time and energy on rather than coming up with stupid laws to pass about sodas and junk food and gays and whatever else. Starvation and poverty are just as big of a problem as they've ever been.. but why am I hearing more on the news about obesity and not so much on starvation? Why isn't the government focusing on the people who can't afford to eat instead of the people who are eating too much by choice?
1 person likes this
@GardenGerty (160708)
• United States
3 Oct 12
You are hearing all of this because it is a way to misdirect people so they are not concerned with the real issues that lawmakers need to help us with. I believe you indicated in another discussion that a medication is contributing to your weight gain, and it may be, but people on meds do manage their weight, and I see you do not blame there either. You have been through quite a lot the last couple of years. You are not really blaming that either. I actually believe that losing weight is easier to achieve than smoking cessation. Both are hard, however, I say from my fat body sitting in a chair. I know how much you worked out when you were not working or going to school. As you say, something had to go. I am employed, but not insured. I am in really excellent health except for my weight.
• United States
5 Oct 12
I am upset with myself for gaining the weight back. I sometimes say it's because I don't have time between work and school and kids.. but truth is if I wanted it bad enough I'd find the time. Yes it would be hard.. and that's what kills me the most. It was hard the first time, I really should have tried a little harder to maintain it as maintaining would be easier than losing all over again! But there you have it.. it's my fault I gained it back and my fault I'm currently doing nothing to lose it. I quit smoking before too, then started again. Also my fault. Now I'm afraid to quit again because of how hard it is. Should have stayed quit the first time. Other than that I'm in good health.. but I'm still young and I'm sure the weight and smoking will catch up with me.
@GreenMoo (11834)
3 Oct 12
Brilliant Katsmeow. I didn't watch the video but loved your response. It's very easy to blame someone else, the government, the world when things don't go as we'd like. But it doesn't get anyone anywhere!
• United States
3 Oct 12
Exactly.. what's happening is that everyone else is suffering for the stupid mistakes and choices of others. As I said, they've put a ban on sodas at fast food places and there has also been talk of them raising the tax on junk foods. Is that going to stop fat people from making bad choices? No.. that's just making EVERYONE suffer. Skinny people like to enjoy sodas when they eat fast food, and they like to enjoy junk food now and then. Why should they be punished just because others can't control their cravings and tell themselves no sometimes?
• United States
5 Oct 12
Well you know what.. I don't think they should have to! Since when is it the government's job to make these decisions for us? But that's the problem, people won't take accountability so the government has to step in and do it for them. Unfortunately the government does support much of our country through welfare, medicaid, unemployment. So yes, those who are on Medicaid are having their health bills paid by tax payers. Do I want to pay for somebody else's coronary bypass because they ate McDonald's everyday and smoked 2 packs a day and drank to their heart's content? No. But the answer to that should not involve making everyone else suffer. I pay my own health bills. I have health insurance that I pay for.. so nobody else is responsible for my health but me and I should be allowed to make whatever decisions I want with my health.
• United States
3 Oct 12
you should watch the video its like wow really good
@GardenGerty (160708)
• United States
3 Oct 12
I saw a bit of the news anchor on TV. I believe in most ways your rant is justified. Around here, my perception is not that we think the school makes kids fat, but we think it is up to the school to solve the problem--in addition to all the other social work that we expect the schools and teachers to do instead of teaching. I also drew out my maximum unemployment, waiting to be called back to a job, having been told I would be called back, but it did not happen. I am overweight, I sit too much and I know it, trying to earn money online to supplement the job I do have. We need to exercise our mouths less and our talents more. I think you are a good example of being responsible and the fact that you are going to school, and hubby took sets a great example and motivation for your kids.
@GardenGerty (160708)
• United States
3 Oct 12
My typo, I meant hubby too.
• United States
3 Oct 12
I'm overweight too.. gained all the weight back after killing myself to lose it. I'm upset with myself, but I'm not blaming anyone or anything but me. My focus shifted from losing weight to working and going to school. I had to let something slide, so my weight was it. I smoke. I know I shouldn't. I know it's not healthy. I don't blame others for the fact that I smoke. I could blame my parents for smoking in front of me when I was a kid.. but they didn't know it was harmful. I know now that it is harmful and I'm an adult who can make my own choices. I should quit, but choose not to right now. The day will come when I'm ready, I'm sure. Until then I have no one to blame but myself. BTW- I also have my own health insurance that I pay for through my job. When my health starts failing the medical bills will come out of my own pocket. So absolutely nobody has the right to try to tell me how to live or what to do.
1 person likes this
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
3 Oct 12
You are so right! I have never seen a five year old drive himself to McDonalds..no one in this society now takes responsibility for what they do and its a darn shame...not to mention the frivoulous lawsuits against others when they should be blaming themselves. And you are also so right about the other issues. I know so many that won't take a job because it's beneath them? Sitting on their duffs not being a active participating citizen because they would rather have unemployment? There is a contractor in the cities here that pays over 20 buck an hour and he can't get anyone to work for him!!!!!! Because its seasonal??? Another dumb reason not to work. Of course that does mean you might actually have to!! I love this discussion...I hope it brings someone a wake up call...!
• United States
5 Oct 12
Oh I wish I'd mentioned those lawsuits!! That's another one of those pet peeves of mine. People wonder why the economy sucks so bad and why everything is so expensive.. well paying on lawsuits is part of a company's overhead! If they want to stay in business they have to turn a profit, so they raise their prices to cover lawyers and liability insurance. Then people complain they can't afford anything so sue the next company that wrongs them in some way! There was a time I was 8 months pregnant and went to eat at a buffet style restaurant. I bit into raw chicken! The manager didn't even seem to care.. I had to fight to get our meal for free which I feel was the least they could do for my trouble. I was very concerned that this would harm my child. But you know what, I didn't sue. I could have. With the right lawyer I could have gotten a nice sum I'm sure. But my baby was fine, and so was I. So I had no real reason to sue. That's ridiculous about people who won't take a seasonal job! Especially one that pays that well. Use what you need and put the rest away and it could last you a few months after the season ends! Nope, everybody wants something for nothing these days. Another reason why our economy is so bad. We need those unemployed to get out there and work in order to give the economy a boost. If they were working there'd be more money going around.. they'd have more to spend thus contributing to their local businesses which is how the economy grows.
@ANTIQUELADY (36440)
• United States
3 Oct 12
U ARE SOOOOOOOO RIGHT. I agree w/everything u said.
• United States
3 Oct 12
Thank you!
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
5 Oct 12
I do think that to a certain extent it is our own fault that we are obese. In fact, I do think that it is mostly our own fault that we are obese as a nation because we do choose to put a bunch of junk into our mouths. However, I do think that there is one other thing that we can place some of the blame on and that is genetics. You know, there are some people that are lucky enough to be granted with great metabolism where they can eat whatever they want to and never gain an ounce. However, there are others, like me that can gain inches in my hips by just looking at some junk food.
• United States
5 Oct 12
Yes genetics plays a role, medications can also play a role as I've recently gained 30 pounds in just a few months due to a medication while I was actually trying to lose weight! I also have the bad genetics. I generally don't eat all that bad, but I gain weight if I'm not careful. I have been able to lose weight and get to a nice size. It was very hard work. Unfortunately when I stopped working out everyday and started going back to my "normal" diet I gained the weight back. I still have a choice. I can choose to work hard and get thin then continue to work hard to stay there. Or I can choose not to work hard and be fat.
24 Dec 12
Oh yes totally agree with you that it is not the fact that they are available (that being bad foods etc!) but, that people have no will power of there own. My brother in law and his girlfriend are the same all the time saying they can't hold down jobs etc and yet he funnily enough seems to keep getting fired or chooses to not even look for a job! Then he says that he can't afford things and blames everyone else - there are other people out there who struggle but, don't blame everyone for their problems!
@bounce58 (17387)
• Canada
15 Oct 12
Hee, hee! I like it that you were so fired up when you wrote this discussion. And yes, I couldn't agree with you more. I was raised in a culture were we stood behind our words and our actions. If something didn't go right, it's mostly 'our' fault. E.g. if someone is overweight, then it's because he/she didn't eat right, or didn't excersice, etc. Yes, I realize that this couldn't be 100% right, as some might be suffering from health issues that cause them to become overweight, but sooner or later we'd have to some of the blame. And not make it an excuse for the state we are in.