Relationship is more on reality and not fantasy.

Cebu, Philippines
October 6, 2012 3:07pm CST
Relationships are never easy. Some days you're going to wake up, that the love you have for that person next to you isn't going to come so easily, sometimes you will find yourself doubting your love for that person, you have fight, argue and quarrel for little things that should not supposed to be a big deal. The only way you can make a relationship last is, if both of you work at it Every Single Day and never give up on it. Also both of you doing it because both of you love each other not just because you need to do it perhaps due to tenure of the relationship that it ends up to be more on companionship than a lover or someone who wanted to be with (a couple ) for life. And that's the kind of relationship that last forever. Love it's more on reality not fantasy. My lotters, what do you think of this? Would you agree with me? Please feel free to share your thoughts.
6 responses
@challs12 (548)
• Malaysia
7 Oct 12
In my side, I think it's very easy to make one relationship able to stand for a long time. All I do is to accept what ever the condition of my partner. If she always get mad on anything, I just let her be as what she use to be, and I try to adapt it. On her side, I advice her to be more pro-active on anything cause I'm a simple person, don't fussy on anything. At first it's difficult to accept each other but over period of time, we make use to each other attitude and behavior. Means, we accept the good and the bad of our partner.
@challs12 (548)
• Malaysia
10 Oct 12
Pro-active in anything, say for example, if she wants to have candle light dinner, she should propose to me or give the idea. Then I'll be happy to have it. In fact, in most case, she must make the first step, shopping and up to on bed story. The relationship I address to off course a marriage relationship. About making her to be what I want, it's not me. I love her, I like her the way she is/was and I don't know what is best she should be other than the time I first love her. About something over board, I think she shows it, we have religion and educated and matured, so, we ourselves must know how to think wisely.
• Cebu, Philippines
12 Oct 12
Oh, thank you for that clarification, I was confused as I am thinking of bf/gf thingy. But I think, either should do something with the relationship and surprised each other not just the other partner.
• Cebu, Philippines
10 Oct 12
I'm just curious what "Pro-Active" are you referring to @challs12 and in what aspect of relationship is that? And I also think that we should not let her/him be for who she/he was especially when it comes to what is good and what is not. We should also set parameters and not let them act just the way they wanted it to be up to the extent that they are no longer know how to pay respect to each other.
• United States
6 Oct 12
I agree with you to a certain extent. I have been with my husband for 6 years, married for 2 and I have never, not even one time doubted my love for him. I've never had to work to make it happen. Even the times where I was so mad at him that I could have wrung his neck, I never doubted that I loved him and that he is the one and only person that I will spend my life with. We very rarely fight or argue. We disagree at times but that's about the extent of it. We have 4 kids and we are completely on the same page when it comes to everything; raising our kids, paying our bills, making decisions, etc. So yes, relationships should be based on reality, but when you find that one person that becomes both the fairytale fantasy AND the reality, that's when you can be truly happy.
• Cebu, Philippines
6 Oct 12
You made me laugh out loud with the "wrung his neck" , I can imagine that. And I applaud you of having a good relationship with your husband. I cannot imagine myself yet at the moment as I am not married yet so I don't know how it feels like to have one nor can relate myself to that but I'm pretty sure it's tough to be a wife, a lover and mom to your kids either you're a full time mom or a working one. Too much responsibilities and at the same time you need to consider the welfare of your little ones but despite of the struggles in life, husband and wife should hand in hand work it out and stay strong to surpass it.
• Cebu, Philippines
10 Oct 12
Thank you so much for that enlightenment I really appreciate that. Yes, I am in the process of weighing things out before tying the knot It's not indeed easy to get married though I am old enough to be in a marriage relationship but even so, I am still scared to get lost of nowhere in the end. The only thing to regret about life is the fact that we only have one lifetime to learn how to live.
@katie0 (5203)
• Japan
7 Oct 12
Yes, maybe many says relationships are hard because the expectations is that someone will just take care of us and will smile forever when the truth is nothing changes. In the begining both sides are thinking about their wants and needs and only in time we start to sacrifice here and there, if one of the to don't work it out it can't last. It's fun thought, because we do it based on love.
• Cebu, Philippines
10 Oct 12
Well I don't expect too much in a relationship nowadays, I'm just enjoying what the relationship brings me. I've been expecting too much before that it took me 6 years to get over it and now I am very much happy and in love with my current boyfriend. We enjoy lot of things together from a simplest to extravagant things that we do together.
@WakeUpKitty (8694)
• Netherlands
7 Oct 12
If you want a relationship you should go for it. A relationship means you both have to work everyday hard to keep it go, make it stronger. If you are not willing to do so it's better to stay alone.
7 Oct 12
I agree with you. In reality couples will have misunderstandings, challenges, and arguments because we are after all two different individuals. In reality we have to work on our love to grow. We only fantasize a happily ever after love, but to have this we have to work for it also.
• Cebu, Philippines
10 Oct 12
Yes, if either party lose it's commitment and hope to the relationship and got tired, nahhh just forget it and move on.
• Philippines
7 Oct 12
Yes you are really right! i am into a relationship now but very long distance, we are not both living on the same country, at the same time we don't have same culture and religion but we still love each other and we have a daughter that binds us. I am luckily involved with him, I trust him and I know that he will never fail to my needs.
• Cebu, Philippines
10 Oct 12
Most of long distance relationship won't work because either of the party can no longer wait and can't get used to the situation wherein his/her partner needs to spend away from him/her for their future and to the family that they are trying to make. I applaud those who has the courage to stay in love despite of the distance and the distance should not be a hindrance for the relationship not to work. It takes a lot of patience, courage and trust to each other in order for it to work out. Otherwise, it will only lead to nothing.