Will you marry for convenience?
By bembzee
@bembzee (768)
Philippines
October 12, 2012 10:07am CST
Marriage is a bond of two who becomes one under the sacrament of matrimony. But their are several cases that they marry not out of love but of security reasons. It can be unusual set up to get married to a rich partner without love involve. But it do happen everyday. Marriage for convenience, as they call it. It sounds a little ironic, spending a life with someone you wish to be somebody else. Can you bear the thought of spending the rest of your life to someone you don't love? Will you pick a rich guy to marry just for security reason? Will you marry for convenience sake only?
4 people like this
16 responses
@Paper_Doll (2373)
• Philippines
13 Oct 12
I definitely wouldn't marry someone for sake of convenience alone. I don't think I can spend all my life with someone I do not love, and much more, sleep with him everyday of my life. I don't think I can do it. This is why infidelity is everywhere because many of us have different considerations in choosing the one they are going to marry. And when the person whom they will fall in love arrived, that is the time they will realized that money isn't good enough.
1 person likes this
@Paper_Doll (2373)
• Philippines
15 Oct 12
What you said are all true. They say that when poverty knocks on the door, love goes out of the window. This is very true to many marriages but like you said, it would be easier for couples to just give up their marriage if they don't love each other.
@bembzee (768)
• Philippines
15 Oct 12
As the song goes, money can't buy you happiness. But i often contradict it by saying out loud, but money can bring you to heaven and you can make heaven out of your money. But i guess it is because i understand the value of money in a family. You can't have money the center of your marriage yet every move of a family member demands money. Ironic but it is true. When things didn't work out in marriage because of insufficient income, love will most likely forgotten. But then you have a point that love should be the soul reason to get married. Because without love a simple hardship and problem makes it more harder to overcome.
@mythociate (21432)
• Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
13 Oct 12
Maybe this is just the doom-&-gloom mindset that befalls everyone (thinking there's no way out of my situation unless someone saves me, and knowing that there's no good reason for saving me unless the person just does it to save somebody), but apparently that's why I'm NOT married yet: because marrying/living-with me is too much an inconvenience if you're not 'ridin` high on the hog' (comfortably set up with more money than you could ever spend).
That's why my 'going to church' constantly proves that Christians today are mostly self-centered hypocrites. The one whom they claim they follow gave up life-in-abundance in order to save humanity; but if they truly followed him then I would've been set up by a 'matchmaker' long ago 
But I guess that's just in movies ... "I hear they pick a "goil" for me; I hope 
she's pret-ty."
But I guess that's just in movies ... "I hear they pick a "goil" for me; I hope she's pret-ty."
@marguicha (223720)
• Chile
13 Oct 12
THe reason to marry someone depends a lot on the culture and how the people are raised. Some people marry only people of their own creed or race, some others seek their spouses among people with the same education or background. I don`t know how much of that is convenience even if some of it is not called that way. Security does not mean only money as money is something easy to lose. I mearried for love at a very young age, but I wouldn`t say that that is an example of antthing as I has very much luck.
@bembzee (768)
• Philippines
15 Oct 12
Thank you for a very open minded response marguicha. People indeed makes decision depending on what or how people, environment, culture dictates. Though few would disagree to this,LOL. Because many are very idealistic when it comes to love. But i kinda like what you said. God bless.
@sjvenden27 (1840)
• United States
13 Oct 12
No way!! If I wanted to marry for security etc.. I would already be married.. I thought about it for awhile, but that is not the way to get married... Been married once... Was about to married but God took him from this earth... but I couldnt do it... Love happiness trust and a strong emotional connection is needed.. Because life can trun so quick.. if you did marry for money or security.. what would happen if you both woke up one day and it was all going... No job, no savings, and losing the home that you were living in... If theres no other connection the realtionship would be a lost cause waiting to happen...
1 person likes this
@bembzee (768)
• Philippines
15 Oct 12
Marriage is like a survival game. Both parties are expected to do his job to make the marriage work. That includes the survival of family in a global demand of economic stability. Security of every family member matters the most even love is being sacrifice. That is why many partner work abroad or away from home. The sad thing is, this is realized late by most people. Though few really choose their bf/gf in a first stage of courtship. They weigh things over before pursuing the courtship and bring it to the next level. It is called practical decision. It do happened every day.
@bembzee (768)
• Philippines
15 Oct 12
I appreciate your response riyauro. Every individual is entitled to his/her own belief. We cannot agree or disagree into some things that we know exactly that no two individuals are the same. We only believe for the things according to our views and aspiration in life.
@mariaperalta (19073)
• Mexico
13 Oct 12
I would never, I hear people who marry for money or because they are having ones child. Id never marry for these reason. They will sure end in divorce. bad idea I think.
@bembzee (768)
• Philippines
15 Oct 12
I would say that their is truth in what you said. Money alone is not a guarantee for a successful marriage and so as love. Before getting committed to someone their are many things yet to consider. You cannot just bypass the opinion of a family without an argument or forgetting the cultural or religious belief that becomes a family tradition. All of this matters or you will end up outcast by the whole clan.
@mialei23 (2385)
• Philippines
12 Oct 12
Even that will be the last resort of being in the edge of fixed marriage because my Family is no choice nor I have no choice. No! I will not marry anybody that I don't know and I don't love just for the sake of money and security purposes. Marriage is a very sacred thing that two people should share the rest of their lives. I'd rather wait for the right men and live happily ever after.
@GemmaR (8517)
•
12 Oct 12
I don't really think that I am the type of person who would ever want to get married, but I do know that if I ever did get married then there is no way that I would do for any other reason than that I loved the person. I have been with my partner for four years and I still don't think that I would want to get married. I do love him, but I am the kind of person who doesn't think that I need to marry just for the sake of it. I would never want to marry anybody for their money because I don't think that it should be about that at all.
1 person likes this
@bembzee (768)
• Philippines
13 Oct 12
It is a matter of your choice to believe in marriage or not because there are indeed cases that marriage do not work out the way we want it. It causes only a big burden of frustration. Living together is also a choice. And the responsibilities of married or not is just the same. It should be a mutual decision and should always be a mutual responsibility.
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
12 Oct 12
If situation needs me to do so-maybe I will consider it.
Let's say, the guy will give all the fortune that my family needs - I think I will go by it.
@bembzee (768)
• Philippines
13 Oct 12
It will be a self sacrificing for a family. But only you can say that you do a right thing. If you will be happy seeing a family having a better life. And you will feel contented and with no slight of regret then the choice you make are worth it. Life sometimes is a matter of how you accept things that come and go.
@airasheila (5454)
• Philippines
13 Oct 12
good day bembzee,
honestly, before i do not agree to this, as you will just marry a guy in exchange for any convenience. however, as years goes by and as the situation pushes me to, so, now, i will do it but not for any monetary or financial assistance but for more other important reason.
1 person likes this
@bembzee (768)
• Philippines
15 Oct 12
I believe so airasheila, Reality is far beyond compare to a dreamy world of love. Love sometimes is not enough to make a life worth living for. We have to consider many reasons before making a right decision. After all it is a life time commitment and we cannot just say no or i am done or i'm fed up when things didn't work out the way we thought so. Although, love is the very basis to commit one's self yet love alone also cannot survive without families security.
@fashionfever (2200)
• Indonesia
13 Oct 12
I wonder when someone marry the rich guy for his money, what would happen when suddenly life changed everything the business goes collapsed and the husband lost all the money he has, would the girl stay with him or would she filled a divorce? We know nowadays economic is unstable and business is up and down, today we might have a lot of money but who knows about tomorrow?
I dont want to get marry for the sake of security reason, Im still able to work and earn my own money so why would I get marry with the rich guy if I dont love him. Im enrolled in university in hope that I can get a better job and better earning in the future, I also learn to have more skills to use it later aside from my university degree.
If I dont like him and he has bad personality, I would not marry him. I will marry the guy whom I love and can make me happy, and happiness is not about money. No problem if he doesnt have a high paying job as long as he is a hard worker, I can work to help earn more money, I can use my skill to save money.
1 person likes this
@bembzee (768)
• Philippines
15 Oct 12
That is a very positive thinking and outlook of life. If you have indeed more resources to earn a living compare to your husband why not help him instead. It must be best to help him make a living for his own rather than waiting him to find a decent job. The important thing indeed is you accept him for who he is and he is more willing to do anything to be a good provider to his family.
@Raine38 (12391)
• United States
13 Oct 12
I have been asked this a couple of times, and my stand still remains: I will only marry for love. When you love a person, you will do anything that you can and that is legit to provide for him/her and to give your family a good life. You will be inspired to better yourself so even if the money is hard to come by, you will always strive to make good and eventually, it will be. The only exception for that maybe, is when we badly need the money to save the life of a loved one. I will never think twice if it would mean that my family will have the best healthcare and will be well-provided for. Maybe I can learn to love that person who helped my family.
Good thing it didn't happen to me. I married my first love, and I have never been this happy. He's a good man, a good provider, and a very good friend.
1 person likes this
@bembzee (768)
• Philippines
15 Oct 12
Ideally every woman wish to spend the rest of their life with someone they love. And it is a strength of being in love that makes their marriage work in one way or another. Although, their are indeed some rare issues of getting married with different reason. Some survive the marriage and learn to love their partner. But most suffer emotionally and still caged in a no love marriage. But then no matter how you end up married, it is still your decision and you expected to do your obligations.
@kokomo (1867)
• Philippines
13 Oct 12
Of course not for me.I would marry the guy I love. It is hard for me to marry a guy just because he has something in life.My parameter in choosing my future husband is of course,I love him.That's the most important thing. Of course, all of us wants convenience in life, and for me being with the one I love is more than a convenience.
1 person likes this
@bembzee (768)
• Philippines
15 Oct 12
Love indeed brings rainbow connections. Being in love makes a world go round. It is a lifetime commitment to share your life with someone else. That is why most people say they wanted to get married out of love and nothing more. But sometimes their are cases that few decided to get married for convenience because of what they had gone through in life. And we cannot blame them for doing so. Every decisions in life is influence by our experiences, environment, families and friends. Thinking ideally they wanted a life together with someone they love but cannot take a risk in letting a chance pass by to uplift her life and her family for that matter. For them, they are making a right decision.
@Kalelreturns (19)
• United States
12 Oct 12
That sounds like trouble just waiting to happen. Being in a relationship with someone you don't love for your entire life, I can tell you that it most likely won't last very long. Without the love in the relationship, you will just end up hating each other.
1 person likes this
@rogue13xmen13 (14402)
• United States
12 Oct 12
If I don't love him, and he isn't someone that I would get along with, then no, I wouldn't want to marry him. I don't think that anyone should marry for convenience. What if the person you marry isn't the person that you really want to be with, then what will you do?
He may be rich, but just because he is rich doesn't mean that he would be a good person.
1 person likes this
@vidhyaprakash_2 (7116)
• India
18 Dec 12
Hi friend, As you mentioned, marriage is a sacred bond and we must be very much careful about it. Marriage is not a child play, we must select a proper person for ourselves. Don't marry a person for other persons sake and forcing activities. We all have the ability to select our life partner as per our wish,. use this opportunity and select a proper and handsome person to marry you.
