You sound really interesting but you don't say much...
By muggiekins
@joliefille (3690)
Philippines
November 24, 2012 12:03pm CST
I was chatting a bit to a random guy on a dating site. I initiated the conversation and later on was sharing to him about my last vacation and places I went to. He didn't share much and his answers were limited to one or two sentences so in my last reply I also answered him with one sentence and didn't feel like asking him questions anymore because he seemed not as responsive as I was.
Two days after that initial chat, I was surprised he was even interested to message me back. But what was even more surprising was what he said:
Anonymous: You're pretty. You sound really interesting but you dont say much...
I was like, are you kidding me?! 
So I sent him this reply:
Me: Thank you. I do say much, if only someone is also interested to ask more questions. I can't blab pointlessly about anything and the other person doesn't share much. But does saying much go by word count? I think I had more word count than you did lol.
My guy friend commented, "Damn, you're a snob! Hahaha." I retorted, "Well, it's one of those days when I don't like talking to a wall."
I am glad he didn't write anymore as I don't have patience for that kind of exchange. Prior to that, I was exchanging messages with a friend whom I had liked for a while and the same thing happened so receiving a message like the one I got from that random guy on the dating site irked me and not want to bother.
So I sent him this reply:
Me: Thank you. I do say much, if only someone is also interested to ask more questions. I can't blab pointlessly about anything and the other person doesn't share much. But does saying much go by word count? I think I had more word count than you did lol.
My guy friend commented, "Damn, you're a snob! Hahaha." I retorted, "Well, it's one of those days when I don't like talking to a wall."
I am glad he didn't write anymore as I don't have patience for that kind of exchange. Prior to that, I was exchanging messages with a friend whom I had liked for a while and the same thing happened so receiving a message like the one I got from that random guy on the dating site irked me and not want to bother.12 responses
@stealthy (8181)
• United States
24 Nov 12
First off let me say that you are too pretty to need to go on a dating sites; what is wrong with the guys that are around that they are not taking up all your time. I agree with you that he should have been saying more. However, some guys are just not good at talking about themselves and sharing at least here in the U. S. I was very shy when I was young so I probably wouldn't have even gone on a dating site much less said much. Now I sometimes talk too much. Although I have been thinking of going on a dating site since I don't have much opportunity to met women these days, I just haven't been able to get myself to try it. Maybe you can share some pointers with me. One reason for my hesitating is that I would be looking for a serious relationship with someone much younger than me with having a family in mind. I guess you could say I'm a bit of a dreamer in that respect.
2 people like this
@joliefille (3690)
• Philippines
25 Nov 12
Thank you. 
I know some guys in my area who liked me but they couldn't even hold a decent conversation with me. By decent I mean at least on the same wavelength and someone I could relate to, you know like you could get lost talking about topics you both find interesting and not notice the time.
I know that some guys are not that chatty but I think if you just open up with one shared interest then you both can go from there. Well you never know until you try, right?
I know some guys in my area who liked me but they couldn't even hold a decent conversation with me. By decent I mean at least on the same wavelength and someone I could relate to, you know like you could get lost talking about topics you both find interesting and not notice the time.
I know that some guys are not that chatty but I think if you just open up with one shared interest then you both can go from there. Well you never know until you try, right?@stealthy (8181)
• United States
25 Nov 12
I should have mentioned that you are not just pretty, you appear to be intelligent and a thinker which may be a problem with some of the guys. For me that is one of the first things I look for, a woman who is smart and is not afraid to show it. Now being honest, I have to say that looks also matter to me.
I'm curious about what kind of work you do. I noticed in your photos that you had been to New York on business; it was nice that you got to see the Statue of Liberty. When I lived in New Jersey, I managed to go see that as well as other sites in New York City. Now I live in New Mexico and I have had some nice visits to several notable sites here in the West.
1 person likes this
@joliefille (3690)
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
Thanks. Exactly hahha. That's why a lot of the guys I know here don't relate well with me on an intellectual level. I'd easily get bored if I can't share interesting topics with anyone.
I just quit my job this month. I worked for a company that sells fingerprint machines and we had dealers in different countries. The company flew me to Miami in 2009 together with another colleague to attend a security fair, we passed by New York so we decided to visit Disneyworld and Statue of Liberty as well, stayed in NY for a few days.
@hereandthere (45645)
• Philippines
25 Nov 12
i get the feeling he was talking to two people at the same time, and by the time he was really focused on you, you were into one-sentence mode already and he never really remembered the first part of the conversation.
2 people like this
@joliefille (3690)
• Philippines
25 Nov 12
Or probably that comment was meant for someone else he was chatting with at the same time
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
26 Nov 12
While I was reading your post, you got me laughing real hard. Coz if I were in your situation, I'd be responding to that message exactly the same way. Too bad for him...tsk tsk tsk
1 person likes this
@joliefille (3690)
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
I could just imagine what if another chatter made the same comment I did about him. Then he would know the problem is his.
Then he would know the problem is his.@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
28 Nov 12
What a weird guy! He must be from another planet! Imagine him saying that to you when he was the one who barely said anything! Geez!
1 person likes this
@jeztrose (1405)
• Philippines
25 Nov 12
It really happens commonly on a dating sites,i guess you are not the only person he is chatting with, i guess he has a lot chat mates too so he is limited with his answer because he is not focusing with you.Well i guess you don't need to rely on that dating sites. its better to date personally than chatting a person you didn't even met.
@joliefille (3690)
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
I think he had a lot of chatmates whom he would later meet out for dates. He was staying in Makati at the time and he is working in Pagudpud. He was an Australian. It seemed like he didn't want to disclose what he was really doing in Pagudpud. I don't mean to be judgmental but you just never know if he has a girlfriend or just broke up with a girlfriend or currently sleeping with someone with no attachment or whatever other stuff.
@jeztrose (1405)
• Philippines
25 Nov 12
Since she has this bad experience on the net, well it is better for her to just date a guy personally,It depends on the company you have made, if you enjoy each other company (like we did ) then it will be fine, but if she doesn't then you don't really need to go on with that.
1 person likes this
@Jeffery_superman (179)
• China
25 Nov 12
It is better to date personally than chatting a person you didn't even met? So will you feel interested in a guy on the net through the conversation you haid? I agree with you it is very hard to accept and trust a guy on the net.
1 person likes this
@sakurage123 (77)
• Philippines
25 Nov 12
Hi Jolie fille! I'm also fund of chatting on dating site.Usually I am the first one who initiate the conversation.I've noticed that"If the man is not interested he has limited answers to some questions.And if he will do that I will not continue chatting him anymore because I don't like to offend and argue people with nonsense things.
2 people like this
@joliefille (3690)
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
True. You would really feel it in their tone and in their sentences even if it's online chat. It's good that he took it as a sign not to bother me anymore.
@Elenakat13 (425)
• United States
25 Nov 12
Yeah that is somehow funny!
My action would be the same like yours
I am a talking person I love to chat but when someone is not saying much I would assume he is not interested and I would leave the conversation
1 person likes this
@joliefille (3690)
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
He should be thankful I didn't waste his time. In that sense I did him a favor.
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
25 Nov 12
That kinda reminds me of my ex, whenever I went to see her it was always me who had to initiate the conversation, I had to ask her what she has been up to, she would never offer me the information and would stay silent if I didn't speak. Then she texts me and says that I'm quiet. ME? When it's always me doing the talking. Sounds like this guy who you were talking to was a time waster. At the end of the day it was his loss, not yours. I just wish people wouldn't waste our time like this, time is precious. If he is like that over the computer what would he be like face to face!
1 person likes this
@joliefille (3690)
• Philippines
25 Nov 12
Hahah makes me ask "what is up with these cases of projecting onto others?"
I didn't feel he was a loss. If he was put off by my comment then so be it. There are plenty of fish in the sea.
@marguicha (223720)
• Chile
26 Nov 12
Although I have heard that some people even got their partners fom a dating site, I feel that this is quite dangerous. From what you tell us, you said a lot about yourself and he did not say much. When you asked him to respond in the same way, he was even rude. From what I can see, the guys were bored and used the web and this particular site to see if something came out of it. Beware.
1 person likes this
@joliefille (3690)
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
Not really a lot, but just a lot compared to what he answered/shared.
My impression of him was maybe he wasn't the chatty type online but more of the face to face chatty type.
@trisha27 (3494)
• United States
25 Nov 12
He may have been chatting with other people is why he may have sounded disinterested. But I am like you, if someone I am chatting with is not really talking with me back and not saying much at all, then I don't see the point of even talking or having a conversation with them any more. Like some have mentioned though, most guys really don't like to delve into conversations much and they are just the one word or one sentence types, unless by small chance he is really interested in you. I interestingly enough am married to a man who loves to chat all the time 
I can never get him to stop talking. Be careful with dating guys online though.
I can never get him to stop talking. Be careful with dating guys online though. 1 person likes this
@cheerfulnuts (604)
• Philippines
25 Nov 12
Hi jolliefille. I'm quiet and shy, but unlike this man, I will talk if someone asks me questions and shows interest in me. I've been to a lot of situation when people show disinterest in me and keep on talking about themselves, after which they would ask me why I'm being so quiet. I wish I have told them that I will talk IF they let me.
Since I'm quiet, it's hard for me to strike a conversation. Talking to a wall is even harder. It seems like you're trying to befriend this person and that person is being a snob. If I were that guy, I would be happy to respond to your messages. You're not the snob. I agree with what you did. Good thing the communication has stopped. With this kind of attitude, I bet this guy will have a hard time finding a date.
1 person likes this
@joliefille (3690)
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
Yeah I can say I am not very talkative, I am even an introvert, but I think some people bring out the chatty person in me. Though in this case I was willing to converse more but he wasn't so it's better not to continue talking to him.
Nah I don't think he has a hard time finding a date. From his looks, anyone would want to date him but it seemed like he has something to hide and I felt he was the kind of person who wasn't willing to be open. I dunno. I just felt that.
Nah I don't think he has a hard time finding a date. From his looks, anyone would want to date him but it seemed like he has something to hide and I felt he was the kind of person who wasn't willing to be open. I dunno. I just felt that.
@vidhyaprakash_2 (7116)
• India
26 Nov 12
Hi friend, nice to hear about your chatting activities. I think you both are quite contradict with each other, it is really hard to deal with such kind of persons, we can find a lot of persons in the dating sites, i wonder why he messaged you in this sort? as you mentioned he is replying you with short comments in the begging, but he is claiming that you are doing it. Don't care a lot for this random person
1 person likes this
@joliefille (3690)
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
Maybe because he saw I had a nice picture? Well he did read my profile introduction and probably thought I was interesting to chat up with.
@Belle_of_the_Ball (896)
• Philippines
25 Nov 12
lols. I would probably do the same if I were in your shoes. Like what other mylotters have commented, he must have been chatting with several people online that was why he wasn't aware that you had been talking with him.
1 person likes this
@joliefille (3690)
• Philippines
27 Nov 12
Haha yeah I thought that at one point too. Or probably our wavelengths just didn't really meet at that point.
