Being selfish and greedy
By 911Ricki
@911Ricki (13588)
Canada
November 24, 2012 1:21pm CST
We are going to my Grandmas house for chinese food to more or less celebrate my Grandfather life, and death. We have done this for the past 7 years, and its sort of like a tradition.
My Grandma doesnt have a lot of money, and not a chunk feeding our family. My younger brother invited his girlfriend (the only reason she said yes was chinese food), my sisters boyfriend (the same thing free food) which they never come to anything.
My Grandma ordered the basics egg rolls, chicken balls, veggie rice, meat rice, then the one thing with bean sprouts.
My two brothers, and my brothers girlfriend will pile their plates full then eat half of it. They dont think of others they push everyone out of the way, and then dont eat it. So I imagine they will do the same tonight, usually my sister and I only take a spoonful of everything so everyone can eat something so my Grandma doesnt get upset that we didnt eat.
My Grandma always phones and asks us what we want, we just say whatever you want. My older brother always says I want this, this and this. My younger brother not as bad, but close to it. My Grandma will spend double the amount buying them what they want.
4 people like this
16 responses
@MandaLee (3764)
• United States
24 Nov 12
Hi Ricki,
Your parents should be so proud of you. You have such good manners and a wonderful sense of respect for your grandmother.What a wonderful example you are. Why don't your parents say anything to your brother and his girlfriend about their lack of manners?
Have a wonderful time with your Grandma.
@911Ricki (13588)
• Canada
25 Nov 12
They dont see there behaviour as being bad, or they dont want to say anything. They always say something in the car, about my older and younger brother about their poor manners, or taking too much and throwing it out. I wouldnt invite them over, knowing they do this.
@doroffee (4222)
• Hungary
24 Nov 12
I just don't understand how some people can be that unthoughtful and heartless as your two brothers, especially the older one. If your grandma is this lovely and helpful, why doesn't he take your grandma into consideration? Also, the girlfriend is really selfish for just coming to eat Chinese food... at least she should bring some gift or food, but I suppose she wouldn't.
@911Ricki (13588)
• Canada
25 Nov 12
My brother use to live with my grandparents (when my grandfather was alive) for free, for years, didnt thank them for any food, free rent, washing his clothes and so on. He expects it now, same with my younger brother he gets it handed to him, and he expects it all the time.
@GardenGerty (160696)
• United States
24 Nov 12
You are only responsible for your choices and your behavior. It is wonderful that you are so aware of how your grandma goes out of her way. I do not see any real way to uninvite these freeloaders, but if it really worries you you could slip some money to your grandma to help her out. I know she would say "no", but maybe you could put some extra money in her purse, or hide it in a chair and "help" her clean and find it.
@911Ricki (13588)
• Canada
25 Nov 12
I tried giving her money, but she carried on how she doesnt want it. Once again they piled their plates and threw half of it out. Karma will come after them sooner or later, it was $100.20 for supper, and we had so much left over, but again my brother and his girlfriend had to have this or that.
@WakeUpKitty (8694)
• Netherlands
24 Nov 12
Except for being greedy it's also a prove of bad behaviour! Besides of the fact you should share you also eat what is on your plate. If you can't eat that much or don't know what it may taste like you take less, way less. You can always take a bit more. Personally I can't understand why people waste food, I assume you never been really hungry if you do so.
I think there is nothing wrong with telling your granny what you like, you can still pick out what she can afford. It might make it easier for her to shop as well. I think the fact your granny is always spending double also is (one of) the reason(s) why your brothers do ask for more/expensive stuff she can't really afford. Since she will (try to) buy it anyway. I hope one day they both will remember how much she cared about doing them (all) a pleasure!
@911Ricki (13588)
• Canada
25 Nov 12
My two brothers and his girlfriend have always got there way. My older brother lived at my grandparents for years for free, free food, rent, and even washing his clothes, then he moved in with his gf and her parents did it. So he expects that now, and they will whine and complain about it. I am not picky, and eat most things except real spicy stuff, so I said the usual rice, chicken balls, and I will try new things. Always clean off your plate, adn that is how we were taught, but my sister and I were raised way different then the two boys for sure. My Mother was always on the mission, we have to grow up and please a man, be able to do everything, so as kids we always were in skating, brownies, swaimming,or this or that, plus school, plus doing all our chores, and even washing clothes. Whereas my brothers were taught a woman does it all for them, so they cant cook or clean for themselves.
@mariaperalta (19073)
• Mexico
24 Nov 12
I would never be that way.. I always wait for everyone else to eat first before I do. Why do people act like fools? Ill never understand greed and selfish people.
@wolfie34 (26771)
• United Kingdom
25 Nov 12
That is totally unacceptable, and wasteful too as well as selfish and greedy, don't they have any manners? It makes you wonder if they are like this when they have guests around or whether they conduct themselves in this manner in their own home. Your grandma sounds wonderful and yet here they are taking advantage of her good nature. I can't believe they don't even contribute either? Why can't they offer to pay for half?
@3SnuggleBunnies (16374)
• United States
25 Nov 12
I think you had mentioned this behavior of theirs before with them wasting food while you and others scrimp to make sure you get by. I wish your parents would make him grow up and be responsible!
@wilsongoddard (7291)
• United States
25 Nov 12
By now, your grandmother knows what your siblings are like. Whether she chooses to see it or not is up to her.
She raised the child who went on to give her such grandchildren. So, in some ways, she bears some of the responsibility.
As was said above, you can only control your own actions. That is both true of how you behave at your grandmother's and true of how you proceed into the future. If and when you have children (of the human variety), don't raise them as your parents raised you or your siblings--neither dump them into the wilderness to fend for themselves (sorry, but forcing a child to pay for their own medication is just barbaric), nor coddle them to the point that they become spoiled, selfish and whiny (as they did with your younger brother).
@marguicha (223097)
• Chile
25 Nov 12
I am so sorry that you could not have a lovely time in this occation due to your siblings inappropiate behaviour. I only hope that for your Garndma it is more important to have her grandkids over than to worry about the manners they have. Take care!
@ankitbhat (269)
• India
25 Nov 12
then she doesnt need to invite those people who have compassion less than an average human being .its great that you dont try to take adavantage of her love and simplicity ...cherish her presence
@vidhyaprakash_2 (7116)
• India
25 Nov 12
Hi friend, good to hear about your granny, from your topic i come to know your granny is very kind and caring about you all. You are really doing a great thing by eating all the food without wasting it, i wonder why others don't know this concept and wasting their food? Also you are not an ordering person and take the food whichever offered to you, i am sure your granny will like you a lot for this good activities
@Ahana123 (139)
• India
25 Nov 12
Thanks for sharing your experience. One must keep in mind the reason of gathering. Wasting food is not doubt appreciated & one day your brother's girl friend & other relatives would surely understand that. It nice to see that you really care for your grandma.
@madhura1 (8)
•
25 Nov 12
Hi
U know how life is than ur brothers.They just want what they want.They don't worry about others.In our family also some people are like this.I think u adjust whatever u have.It is good nature and keep it up.We should fell happy and satisfaction whatever we have and whatever we family offer to us with love.
@jugsjugs (12967)
•
25 Nov 12
It is great that you do not take advantage of your Grandma, unlike the others.I am sure that your Grandma would notice that you are respectful, rather than being like the others.
It is nice that you are all invited over and also that you all go each year, our family do not do things like that, if anything we are the opposite and have drifted apart.
@edvc77 (2140)
• Philippines
25 Nov 12
I think one must first be reminded of the reason and purpose of celebration. I mean one is not actually there just for foods. It is a reunion and gathering of families. And they must consider the situation of your Grandma. However, consider as well that everyone is there for celebration and it must not be spoiled after all you are in one family.
Have a nice day!
