I Hate Being Forced Into Situations
By MoonGypsy
@MoonGypsy (4606)
United States
November 29, 2012 8:50pm CST
whenever i am forced in a situation or having to deal with someone i don't like, how come the first thing people say is that i must embrace the person or the situation. this is what i feel like at least. i feel like people always want you to submit to what you don't want. what ever happen to trying to find away to avoid the person or situation that makes you feel out of control or forced? what is not that a solution. it's always cope, cope, cope, cope, cope. i am all coped out. i am so coped that i have ulcers at a young age. constantly dealing with situations and people that i am forced to deal with and make me feel out of control. for example, i am forced to accept the baby as my nephew into my life (just cause it's a baby), and his mom that i really don't like. why? first, it's a baby. second, family pressure. i pretend to like her. i really don't why? not only because of the things she has done in the past. i don't like her because to me she represents lack of control in my life. i had to live with her and my brother in law, when my brother in law took her in off his door step all drugged out. i had to endure her, when she rubbed it in my face that we were gonna "be sister for ever, ha ha ha" when she got pregnant. she represents force. i hate that element in my life. i hate the things that create it. i know i shouldn't. i know i won't get met with popular demand on this, but i have some secrete resentment for the kid. i can't wrap my head around what i know. it's not the kids fault. it's doesn't make me feel better about it or it's mom. but, to be a good person i must pretend i like her and that the baby is my nephew. force force force. i have to take pills the few times i am around them, just to deal with them. my husband refuses, but someone has to out of the both of us, right....cause it's a baby. yeah, yeah, yeah. i know. one thing is for sure. i am glad i don't have baby sit, like she asked me to. my husband won't let the baby in the house. what a relief on my part.
2 people like this
8 responses
@frontvisions101 (16043)
• Philippines
30 Nov 12
You have to be flexible most of the time. You can't expect people to adjust to your attitude all the time. It has to always be give and take. You wouldn't know when people are already trying to adjust to you most of the time unless you pay attention and shift to a different perspective, or at least ask them.
@MoonGypsy (4606)
• United States
30 Nov 12
i can dig it, but it's not like i wanted to know her in the first place.
@Adoniah (7513)
• United States
30 Nov 12
You have a lot of family issues that you need to address honestly. You are tearing yourself up inside over things that really need to be resolved. It is affecting your relationship with your spouse also. You better talk that out soon or you could end a marriage.
You need to talk to the offending person one on one on neutral ground away from all other family members...You need to do this now and stop the festering...Good luck.
@MoonGypsy (4606)
• United States
30 Nov 12
well, fortunately my husband feels the same way i do about the situation. he hates her worse. he also doesn't want anything to do with her or her baby. so, there is no problem there. i am glad i have his support on that. we both don't like people or situations being forced on us.
@wongchoiyee (7413)
• Malaysia
30 Nov 12
I know how you feel ,maybe you are not in term with your sister, so that result you for dislike the baby, who is your nephew. Never mind, this is common in all families, even I don't like my sister in law.
@savypat (20216)
• United States
30 Nov 12
When I find myself in a situation that I just can't deal with, the first thing I do is ask myself why I am having such a reaction to it. Then I try to look at it and see if there are things about it I can deal with. This helps me divorce myself from my emotions and tell myself what guidelines I need to lay down to cope with the situation. What are you really worried about? Are you afraid you will get left with the child? Are you afraid the family will judge you harshly? Find out what you really are afraid of. Then you can deal with that, since that is the one thing that is within your control. Your point of view, is not right or wrong, it's just how you see things. Accept this and go on. There is always a price to pay for how you feel, but if you know it's your choice, you at least know that you chose that reaction. Blessings
@sender621 (14893)
• United States
30 Nov 12
I don't thrink that are very mnay people who like to be forced into any given situation, I know that I don;t. If i feel that I am being forced into sometbing it makes me dislike it all the more. Something I might have enjoyed is now bitter.
@doroffee (4222)
• Hungary
30 Nov 12
Oh, I know what you're talking about. I hate to be forced into anything, especially if their reasoning is like "that's the tradition". I'm not really good with babies as of the moment. Yet when I went to visit my grandma, and there were my cousin with his girlfriend and their kid, everyone expected me to look after the kid so the girl and my mom could chat away the whole day (I don't have any problems with the girl otherwise, she's really nice)... like it was not what I planned, they didn't even ask me, and everyone was like, "Oh, XY could do it". And I had to look after a hyperactive 5-year-old, whose biggest joy was to cut all the papers on the table with a pair of scissors like a lunatic, and throw them around, and afterwards, my grandma (whom I hated because she was a bad-tempered evil person), when she saw the mess, gave me such an evil stare, like it was all my fault... They shouldn't have make ME supervise the kid in the first place... I was 19 or 20, had NO experience with kids and I really didn't wanna be too strict and educate others' kids and didn't even know how to tell them not to do that, and my grandma could have done it, but she was just too damn lazy to supervise the kid (I mean, she didn't have any bigger diseases or pains that would have stopped her from doing it)... it's so much easier to blame everything on me, right...
