a child's desperate dream
By imjamie
@jamieclavero (187)
Philippines
December 20, 2012 7:22am CST
i count myself lucky for everything that God has given to me throughout my whole life. but despite of overflowing blessings, i am still searching for something. my heart is still longing. longing for a childhood that i wish i had.
i never grow up in a bed of roses. my childhood stories was all built in a small house. all my fantasies are built together with my father, mother and my sister. i had a fun childhood years even we are lacking of fancy toys or delicious chocolates.i never had any of those affluent toys not until i reach my grade school years. but those material things doesn't really matters. for all i want is moments that will be cherished for a lifetime with my family.
due to the desperate dream of my loving father to give us a better life, chooses to work abroad even before i enter my grade school years.despite of my young age, the memories are still fresh.
i remember the day we took him to the airport, i was so young that i could not feel any tears coming from my eyes. what i can only feel was excitement. then i saw a hug airplane. my aunt said "your father was there." being an innocent child, i just wave at the airplane and shout "papa!" hoping he would hear me as the plane fade in the horizon.
thus, i had my whole childhood without my father. all i had as memories are his precious letters. funny thing whenever i saw a plane in the sky, i always proudly wave and tell to my friends "papa is there" and i will shout hoping he would hear me out. then one day, he came back. i was so happy that i always wanted to come with him wherever he is. i always admire my father. his generousness, his faith, his attitude. i like everything about him. for me, he is the best father in the world. then the time had come that he has to go back abroad for work. i was sleeping when i left. but i felt his warm touch and his kiss on my forehead before he went.
as i grow up, he became my inspiration. sadly, during my college years, i only had a few moments with him whenever he was on vacation. i admit. i was the one who had changed. i was the one who had been far away for he had never left me.
and now, i am already a young woman. i am starting to realize how much i miss him. how i wish i could bring back time.
as of now my father is still working abroad and i hope to see him soon and say to him once more"papa, i love you."
2 people like this
7 responses
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
21 Dec 12
I am sure you would be able to achieve that big dream of yours. But for now, why not call him up and tell him how much you miss him and how much you love him? I am sure he is waiting for you to tell him that.
1 person likes this
@jamieclavero (187)
• Philippines
29 Aug 15
oh! i've been doing that every week. thanks to modern technology i could even catch up on him through video calls.
@artemeis (4194)
• China
21 Dec 12
I am wondering if you had you father reading this post of yours here and I hope that you did. It will surely make his day and tell him that all his efforts are well worth it with such an assurance coming from his children.
Nowadays, a lot of parents are missing such returns from their own children and in later years the care needed. Life is really almost similar to the lyrics of the song "Cat on The Fiddle" and it needs to be stopped. We need to sacrifice a few money making or dating time and use it for our family members. A lot of people do not realize that even a few minutes of phone call, video chat or drop in is worth giving hundreds of dollars with no love.
Do give your father a call sometime and if you can afford it, go visit his workplace during your holidays. Make the time and learn from the sacrifice because if we cannot do it now we will never do so.
@jamieclavero (187)
• Philippines
29 Aug 15
i really wish i could just be home with my father right now. i dont need any fancy things. i just really misses having him near me.
@maximax8 (31046)
• United Kingdom
21 Dec 12
The world is a large place and it is sad when an important relative is living and working in a different country. Some people living in the Philippines feel they have to work overseas and then spend money home to the members of their family. I believe that your papa was doing that for your family. Yes, it was a shame he hadn't been able to find a job locally within your home country. I hope you see your papa again soon. Good luck.
1 person likes this
@rog0322 (2829)
• Cagayan De Oro, Philippines
20 Dec 12
Hi,
You are expressing the sentiments of thousand of children and young adults about the sad story of having a father working far from home. I have always grown around my family even if we are poor and I may say it is more desirable to be away just to have a better life for when it is my time to go to try my luck, I hardly looked back to that miserable home where I grew up. I know the loneliness of those who went away and for those who remained but there's no point in staying when the future looks uncertain at home.
There shall come a time when you shall be together again for good, when that will be, only your father knows. Even if you lived a childhood away from your dad, time shall compensate for the loss by a full life out of his sacrifices. The best you can do is to be worthy of that sacrifices by being a good child, to have a family of your own someday that don't need to be torn asunder by the pursuit to find a better quality of life.
1 person likes this
@jamieclavero (187)
• Philippines
22 Dec 12
thank you for taking your time on reading my sentiments. i just pour my heart out
@mariaperalta (19073)
• Mexico
20 Dec 12
great post .. you sound like me here. I grew up in mexico, while my dad worked 3600 miles away in the usa for many years. Hed come home, most xmas times for a week maybe 2. It wasnt the same having him here all time. This will be the last xmas with out him, hes retiring this month. he will come home back to mexico for good now. been a long 33 years without him here. Merry xmas to you there. God bless you as well.
@jamieclavero (187)
• Philippines
22 Dec 12
thank you for your appreciation and for letting me know that you understand how it feels
@pomwango (1353)
• Kenya
20 Dec 12
it can be so hard when parents are living in different areas,if it were possible you should find out if you can move to where he works.when you miss out on the parental love you can feel sad and lost.otherwise with technology nowadays you can communicate with him more like on skype.emails and telephones.discuss your issue first with your family and see what they think of the situation.i wish you the best.
1 person likes this
@jamieclavero (187)
• Philippines
22 Dec 12
thank you for your kind response and for reading this piece of work. this is my way of pouring my heart out.
@eileenleyva (27560)
• Philippines
17 Mar 13
jamie, this is such a moving piece, have you sent your father this?
You are very blessed to have such a selfless, loving father. You must reciprocate the love and caring by being the good child that he wants you to be. Make plans, pursue a career, and take care of your family. If you choose to fall in love, be sure you fall in love with a decent guy, one you can present to your father. Better yet, choose the one who has the qualities of your father, such as the ones you mentioned above.
One day, your father will come home for good, for working abroad is not forever, the bones age and the muscles give way, as a person ages. When that time comes, be sure your father is well taken care of.
Blessings.
