When Your Mother has a Favorite Child

It would be better if you will not take it against your brother. Just take it as a constructive action for you. you would be a better big sister if you won't make this frustration obvious to him. just an advice.

I can actually relate to you because my mom is that way as well. But I am so much older than my brother. Most of the time I just let things pass. You can't really change your family and arguing with patents isn't mature at all. So what I usually do is shut up, say "you're right" and then shut up again. It lessens the fuss and prevents her from saying more things I dont like.

I don't like to say this, but parents often will pick favorites whether they know it or not. I was my mom's and grandmother's favorite, while my brother was my mom's favorite and my step-father's favorite. I know that many of my friends parents secretly played favorites with their kids. Many of the girl's ended up being "their father's daughters" and many of the boys ended up being "their mother's sons". I think that some of you know what I mean by this. Pretty much "daddy's girls" and "mama's boys", and this all has to do with the Oedipus and the Electra Complexes where boys will favor their mothers and mothers might do the same back, and girls will favor their fathers and the father might do the same back. It's all psychological really. You can see which parents favored which children and which children benefit because of that. Mothers and daughters usually always get into fights, and boys usually feel a lot of pressure to be as good or better than their fathers. Don't take it personal if your brother is a "mama's boy", these things happen, I have seen it often. I would tell you to call her out on it, but that might do your more harm than good. The only time that favorites are a little difficult is with multiples. I have twin cousins, and so far, no one has really picked favorites with them because they are both equally intelligent and of equal physical strength, and the only thing that really differentiates them is their gender and the things they like, but other than that, if it were not for the fact that they were a boy and a girl, they would be nearly similar. It's really hard to pick favorites in that case.

You have to talk to her. My older daughter thought the same things because I often send her off to do tasks for me that I do not ask of her sister. Now that she understands the reason, she is proud to do those tasks. It might surprise you to know that your brother might feel the same way even though it doesn't look that way to you.. Both of mine often swear that the other is the "favorite".

I also feel this. its not fair,they want you to be disciplined,but your brother/sister who do bad attitude didn't,maybe they are the one who is scared to scold there own child. tsk tsk.

There's nothing you can do in this situation but to understand maybe you just feel that way but your mom means nothing. Sometimes we just feel that parents have favoritism but in reality they love us all in different ways. Try to exert some more efforts to show your mom the love and care you have for her and do the same to your brother in this way you can save the relationship within the family. Think positively. :)

I guess you should talk to your mother about this. A good old heart to heart talk will really sort things out with you and your mom. Maybe there's a reason why your mom likes your brother more than you. Maybe it's because he's the only guy or maybe it's because you're older than him and she has high expectation for you.

I don't know how a mother can do partiality with her kids. I have two kids and I scold them if any one did any wrong thing. But mostly I scold my elder on as he is elder and the other is too small. But my elder son complaints that he get scold always for wrong acts of younger one too. But I try my best to make him understand why I scold him. A mother, all children are equal.

If you think that your mom sees your brother as someone who is better than you, maybe you should exert effort in showing that you have good things to show as well. Why do you think that your mom favors your brother more? Is he much younger? If he is, maybe because he still needs special care or maybe your brother is just "malambing" (sweet) to your mom.

I always felt this way about my younger sister, she got tons of attention and treated like a queen. I, on the other hand was pretty much ignored... It hurt me and I let it get to me. I now have low self esteem horribly. I hate it. Don't let it get to you the way I did because the only person it will hurt is you. If you feel like you can talk to your mother about it I would. I could not approach my parents to talk because all they would do is yell and scream at me instead of just talking... I wish you the best and know that your a very special person.

Oh That's not good to know. I think you have to be sure about that before assuming. The best way is to talk nicely to your mom. This is a very rare case in parent-child relationship so you have be very careful in thinking such, it may lead to creating a gap between you and your mother. As I have said, it is a wise move to talk to her directly. Have a good time!

I think my mother's favorite is my youngest sister. She looks like her so maybe that is the reason why she's the favorite. It's annoying when I was a child that even when she made a mistake, she's always free to go while we suffer her grounding rule. I did not try to compete with her but focused on what I can do to be a good daughter to her even if she notice it or not. But now that I am an adult, I don't really care who she loves the most as long as I love her. I love her in spite of this and I'm really focusing on the things that she does for me and not the things that she did not do.

Even i feel the same some times. I can really understand your feelings. My younger brother gets more love and affection than i do just because he is young but that's not my mistake. Even if he does some thing wrong it's because of me because you teach him this. That's what my mother says. It is not to the extreme yet but i don't have much of an issue with it because she treats us similarly when it comes to food, pocket money, luxuries. In fact i have a better cell phone then my brother has. Do not complain to your mother about it. All mothers love their children equally. Its just our way of thinking.