Can EX be friends?

Well, I will share first my personal experience with a similar situation. I'll start with, I have broked up with my former boyfriend for 2years. I asked him if we can still be friends because since we were still in childhood we are already friends. Somehow the moments that we've shared will always be a part of our lives. Then he accepted the friendship. Every time we talk he frequently injecting to our discussion, what if we should be together again? And I kept telling him directly and indirectly that there is no chance that we may be together for this time on. After he had come to a realization that it'll not work this time, he started to stay away and cut any means of communication between us now. Our friendship was gone. Now, I think lovers who broked up could never be friends again. Although some people can maintain their friendship after a heart breaking situation.

I'm good friends with my ex-husband as well as a man I dated for four years. The man I dated was my best friend. The romantic relationship wasn't the only thing we had together. I enjoy his company. We have many shared interests. In fact, my daughter and I are going to a concert and dinner with him Thursday. In my opinion, in order to stay friends with an ex, two things need to be true. First, all romantic feelings for the ex must be gone. Being with a friend should be comfortable. It should be enjoyable. If you still have feelings for your ex but he/she doesn't for you, it would be painful. Painful doesn't make a good friendship. Secondly, there needs to be some type of connection other than the romantic connection you once shared. I'm friends with my ex-husband because we have a daughter and need to communicate. Seeing us happy together is good for her. That's my connection with him. I have common interests with my ex-boyfriend. I enjoy his company. I was friends with him before we dated. So the previous friendship, as well as all the things that made the friendship, is the other connection for us. If there isn't anything between the two people other than a past romance, I don't think a friendship is possible. Is this a person she would be friends with normally?

I know that some people are friends with their ex-partners and don't find it problematic, but in my own case it didn't work out. I tried to be friends with one of my ex-boyfriends. I was the one who ended the relationship and he asked me if we could still be friends. In the beginning we had a good friendship and we spent together and had a good time together. After a while my ex-boyfriend started talking about our relationship all the time. He told me that he still loved me and that he wanted me to give our relationship another chance, but for me the relationship was over and I wasn't interested in getting back. He found it very hard to accept that and we weren't able to have a normal friendship because he always talked about our relationship and tried to convince me to take him back.

I stick with the saying" ONCE A CROOK, ALWAYS A CROOK. I met a girl last year feb online, we chated and then we talked on phone too. One day she called me up and said "I LOVE YOU". From that day onwards l took her so specially. I just forgot everything else in the world. In march it was my birthday and she forgot to wish me, then she started ignoring my phone calls. I was so upset at that time. One day she picked up phone and told me that i was busy with work. I let it go.

I'll never be so cool but probably i still wanna us to be friends.Many people are actually facing the same problems.For i'll never try to contact my ex since we broke up,but i still hope that he can live a better life than before.While some simple contacts still ok for me.

I will never accept Ex as a friend. I believe he or she will never be a common friend. Yeah, it may prolong the pain, I agree with your girlfriend on this. You know, EX is just like a shadow for me, it always reminds me of the sadness in the past, so I will try my best to forget EX, just like he or she never exist.

i think that is going to be too hard to do. Ex can be friends probably but their break up must not be due to something someone in the relationship has done, like cheating and other "grave" matters. I had two exes and i have become civil with the first boyfriend, we are facebook friends, greet each other, and chat sometimes... that is because our break up wasn't so bad... we just grew apart, lost communication and ended the relationship as the best option. I could not begin to imagine though if i would ever become friend with my ex, someone who cheated on me, lied to me and took me for an idiot. I might not even want to be in the same place as him, i just might charge up to him and land a punch anywhere on his face.

I think that is the better way if there is no bitters experience with both of them or even if there are misunderstanding and they broke out because someone is hurt. Better to remove those ill feelings to make be friend again...

Hi sunshinesophie, I think your friend is right in thinking that ex can not be good friends unless either they were never in love at all or seprated because of some problem like medical problem ..something on which they had no control. But usually break ups are not sweet but very bitter. Each of the party is hurt and if they try to be friends then they would be fake friends. You may break but feelings remain.

It really depends on their relationship and the reason of break up. Normally, guys do that, they will ask their ex girlfriends to be their friends without knowing that the girl will be hurt by this. In my case, I am no longer a friends with my ex boy friend. I even created a discussion entitled Ex boyfriend = Unfriend about this. Its hard to move on if the ex boyfriend keeps contacting her. Better to have some space for awhile until she finally recovered.

It is hard and difficult to be friends when one has gone through all those emotions, but only if you keep it within you. One should let go of the emotions, forget and move on...I personally dont see anything hard to be friends, if not best friends...but at the same time it is going to be difficult (emotions is all that is bothersome).....Move on and be happy....cheers

To be honest, i can't be friends with ex, but some guys can do it. In your friend case, if she is ok with it then they can be friends, if she is not ready for the friendship, then better she just ignore her ex- message.

I have never run into this kind of situations before.I got married with my first love.Otherwise there are some examples in my daily life that the two broke up and can still be friends.But there are also exceptions.I think it depends on the reason why the broke up . If one of them is badly hurt by the other,there's seems little hope for them to be friends,if for some other reasons,maybe,it is possible to become friends.

You are right. It is really difficult to put up a smiling face when one has been jilted or suffered broken relationships.

I have never remained friends with my ex's, mainly because we ended the relationships on bad terms, my previous ex doesn't even know where I am, I had to escape to get rid of them. Some people are ok being friends with their ex's but others find it too painful to see their ex with someone else, especially when they still love them deep down. I guess it all depends on the circumstance of how the relationship ended, if it ended well then there is no reason why you can't part friends.

In that situation, your friend boy must be in friend with that girl. If that boy sees another girl, your friend girl must accept as friend. She must find a boy with true love.

some of mine can be friend..and the rest refuse to be my facebook friends..maybe they think that when they becomes friends again with me, they are in trouble..

Actually from boy's point of view,take his ex-girlfriend as a normal friend is very easy to understand,because it is fate that two people have a relationship no matter how long it is,so I think if both the boy and girl had aparted can be friends but need to keep a distance.

Although some ex’s ended up not being friends, there are some people who maintain a good relationship with their past relationships. This really depends on how the broke-up ended and if they have proper closure on their relationship. Some would either accept the fact that they are not capable together and some may not.

It will always depend on how their relationship ended. Some people can tolerate and can handle being friends with their former flames because, whatever the reasons and differences they had that made them called it quits were all taken cared of and discussed as mature persons do so there's no bitterness on both parts. But, if it is otherwise, there is no point in torturing one's feelings just to suit the other party's desire to make friends like nothing's happened.