I'm not invited tomorrow

I have accepted that I'm not wanted there. It saddens me but they are oblivious to it. My daughter asked to wear my sweater blouse. It's beautiful. His mom gave it to me for Christmas. I won't have anywhere to wear it unless it is to the doctor. I just don't ever get to get out. I have cabin fever, I guess. They get to come and go, but I don't and they rarely think about it.

I have you here at Mylot. I'm thankful for that. All my friends are quite far away from me. I don't have any friends here. I don't get out to church. I called my church yesterday to see if there was a bus to pick people up and take them home. They said no. They didn't offer any suggestions. SIL's mom plays the organ there, but it is out of her way to come get me, so I don't ask her. There are 2 cars here but I'm not allowed to drive them except when it is to take my daughter (his wife) somewhere when he is working. I normally like being alone, but today I just feel left out.

How about taking a walk around the block and see who you run into? You might have an interesting conversation.

That would be nice to be able to do that. I have no friends to spend time with. I wish I lived next door to one of my friends. We used to be very close. I was their nanny then. I felt needed.

@stary1= I agree with you. PQ- So other years you have been included. Hmm. That is weird. I can see where you would feel sad with the limitations you have. I am always depressed but I know how it can pull you down and make you feel less than complete. I can see where you would feel badly and I am sorry. I would feel alittle hurt myself. I hope that you find something to occupy your time and that it isn't too bad for you. You can always email me. Hehe

celticeagle I love beng alone too and unless it's a really really good close game, I don't care for football anymore either. I still say for major holidays both sides of the family, especially if one is alone, should be at least be given the choice to all be together..there are plenty of other days when families can be separate...

The only time I get out of the house is for doctor appointments, and food shopping once a month and at Christmas and thanksgiving. This year Christmas was at our house. I say our house because I pay part of the rent. I wouldn't be so upset, but other years I have been included. I feel like I'm just not welcomed this time. U certainly don't want to go where I'm not wanted so I will just stay here alone. I can't get out to church. I don't have a car where I can come and go, and I'm only allowed to drive one of the cars if, per chance I have to take my daughter to the psychiatrist... Which I haven't had to do. I'm getting depressed this winter. It's times like this that I wish I had someone in my life so I wouldn't feel like a fifth wheel. I don't belong anywhere except to myself. The feeling of NOT being family is magnified right now. There is some history here. I was told once I should know when I'm not wanted. Then when they needed me for financial support I was suddenly family. It just happened that I wasn't happy where I was and the rest is history. I normally like being alone too. That's not the point. I wasn't told in advance that I wasn't invited. I see the dessert makings and ask if we are doing anything. Then it's we are but you aren't. I'm embarrassed for asking. I wish I hadn't asked.

I don;t think they meant to be mean but it was very rude for sure. I have had get-togethers and all of my friends know me so well. I have always been real clear on the fact that EVERYONE close to me is welcome. I would never ever ever dream of leaving anyone out on purpose and especially a family member. She expressed an interest in going and the right response would have been "sorry we didn;t invite you because we thought you wouldn;t be interested but we would absolutly love to have you join us." I actually have never sent out invites for get togethers. I just tell people. If the bring a friend...the friend is welcome too. My door is always open to my friends and family.

The last thing you just said PQ really burns me up because I have been there. We were not treated like family until it was pay day and they wanted money from us. I am so sorry your feeling the way we felt then... We are here for you PQ always.

I have told my daughter I have winter depression to explain the tears. I also said I don't feel well. I can't come out and say I am hurt because I am not wanted at the get together. I'll get over it. It just burns for now. Payday I will be family again.

Oh how sweet! Ill be there in spirit sweet one! I wish I were closer also. It would be a huge honor yo meet you and give you a big hug! Out the coffee on. Here I come!

I would have brought my phone for mylotting. I might have also brought my e-book. I would have occupied myself. I don't know what I have done to be excluded this year.

Thanks. In oretty much okay now. I'm watching TV on Netflix. I took my meds so ill probably sleep again soon.

It is now 8:51 in 2013. I'll be okay. I'm looking forward to spending time with you guys. Thanks. This is home to me. All my friends are at mylot.

In not telling her. She is wearing my sweater blouse I got for Christmas. I heard them talking a few nights ago. They were talking in hushed tones about the banana pudding and the football game. They had to have planned to exclude me. It just reinforces the thought that I am not really family. I'm only family when they need me for something.

I'm getting over it. Being able to talk about it here is enough to help me feel better. Thanks.

I appreciate your words but I don't want to say anything. I just don't want to rock the boat and cause problems in the home. I will be co tent here and to talk to you, my mylot family.