Just Shut Up Already!

Yeah I understand what you mean. That would be a bit frustrating. I had my mother act that way with somethings when my daughter was younger. At one point I just had to tell her that if I want her advice then I will ask for it. Otherwise don't give me the never ending speech all the stuff she wanted to tell me or criticize me about. I hope that your grandmother will do better towards you.

Hi there MaylaJay, Honestly speaking my mum would get sick if she didn't able to say her litany to me. That sometimes, this sounds fine but there are times I feel annoyed. Imagine that the moment you wake up in the morning, you would hear her voice saying those litany, oh boy, its like hearing an old vinyl.

I do love my mother but she tends to get way overboard with her words. My elder sister and I often discuss our mom's domineering attitude towards us. There are times she's so bossy that she forgets that we're not little girls anymore. She has this attitude of always wanting to be that person who's always right. When what she wants isn't favored, she sulks. Though there are times that I feel guilty being annoyed at her. But then, she just doesn't stop. She has this tendency to want to be in control.

Me? I have already experienced saying to my mom, "Just shut up". I don't know why I said that. Maybe I was fed up and so, I said those words withouth thinking. It is just I am so tired criticizing me about always late on church. She's always saying that God does not want people to be late or else God will punish us or she always saying that we're going to hell if we don't follow this law of God-- something like that. I feel like I am a sinner to God. Yes I am a sinner, but why she have to say it all over again? It seems that she wants me to be perfect in the eyes of God which of course, I am only human who commits mistake and I am not perfect.

From my childhood to adulthood, my parents never failed to tell me I'm a lazy person because I'm sleeping more. Of course teenagers are sleeping for extra times because of growing issues. I still sleep more whenever I have day off from working but my parents thought it's not good, that I should be awake early to get some sun..booo, I never listen..I just love to sleep whenever I want.

My mother in law criticized me a lot. My three kids and I lived with her for several months while my husband stayed behind to fix our house so that we could sell it. My youngest was only a toddler. My MIL had a bird bath on the back patio and my son just loves water and always wanted to splash his hands in this bird bath. My MIL refused to put it away or up high enough out of my toddler's reach. She said that I needed to train my toddler to stay out of this bird bath. I couldn't really say any thing as this was her house. But toddlers are too young to understand that they are not to splash in the bird bath. That's why there are child proof caps, child proof locks on the cabinets doors, etc. I have older children and so, it was quite a job to watch him, as well as give some attention and supervision to my older children. So, I would take them to parks, instead of having them play in her back yard. And she still criticized me. I could not win, I was so glad we moved out. And when she was older and needed to live with relatives, we just could not take her. She would be miserable with her complaining. It was sad because she missed out on so much if she could have just enjoyed her grandchildren more. You could talk to your grandmother, if she will listen. If she won't listen, there is nothing you can do. All you have to do is limit the time she sees you so that it is not a bad influence on your child. But send her lots of photos. And just have your child talk to her on the phone. This is what I did and that worked. My MIL did appreciate all the photos and my children's art work and greeting cards.

Hi Maylajay I know how sad and frustrating is being treated in such way. My mother gets mad and is rude, but I try to love her. It hasn`t been easy living near her, I tried to take love from her, but I see that many times she is lack of it. So I try to give love to her. But I learnt 17 years ago, I`m 40 now, that I must love God most and then everyone else. God loves me as I am, with all my faults and virtues. Blessings Mylajay... dainy