How do you feel when today is your Dad's 1st death anniversary?

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Papa passed away last January 20, 2012. It was the most painful day of my life in the year 2012. A year after, how am I supposed to feel? I am glad that the whole family already moved on, but still I can't deny I can see it in their eyes longing papa is still here with us. I am missing Papa, wondering if it's true we will see each other again in the other part of our lives. I've been asking myself if Papa can see the tears in our eyes or in my eyes right now? Is it true that he is here been watching us everyday in our lives, as what old ones belief? Whatever it is, what I feel right now is dreaming I will be given a chance to hug Papa one more time. This is my great opportunity to tell other people who's Father still alive to show your Love and Care. To hug them for me because I can no longer do that with my own Father. Wherever you are Papa, thank you and will always Love you.... I won't say bye now I won't hope to see you again, but believe me you will be here in my Heart till the end.