Can you forgive a huge lie if your lover Finally tells you the truth?

I don't like being lied to either. The operative word in your discussion is "their truth". "Their truth" don't necessarily mean they're telling the truth. I believe in being honest also and sometimes my honesty and frankness has gotten me into trouble. Once a person has lied to me the trust I had for them is broken, but I can forgive a lie and to say I would never believe them again is stretching it. It may take a while for them to win back my trust, but it can be done. The lie, whether or not it would end a relationship, depends on the severity of the lie. You have to think of it like this, if he confessed the lie, then it shows that he wants to come clean and make a clean start. If you heard the lie from an out side source and he denied it, would be a different story. I can forgive a lie. The Bible states:"Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those that trespass against us." What if God felt the same way?

Anyone who did not like when someone is lying. If that happens to us. It is natural that we are angry. God is also angry with people who lie. Therefore, we must be better than those who lied, so the quality of our lives will affect the lives of those who always lie.

I would consider the fact that he came to me and told me before I found out from other sources but honestly, if it was huge...it would be difficult for me to forgive to the point where I continued the relationship. I've been through all this and im a very forgiving person but there is no denying that it changes the relationship so much that it moves on to where you are forever trying to get back to that spot where you trusted without question but you can't. You will never get that same level of trust back no matter how much you want to and no matter how much he proves himself. It will never ever ever be the same. From expeience, my advice would be to forgive but leave anyway. Some people can work thru these things and only you can decide. One thing for sure is that it will never be the same

I have always preferred my partner to be open and honest. Lying is not a good thing. I would rather know whatever it is then to have to find it out some other way.

It depends on what kind of lie he/she tells.If it is an outrageous lie,you have to weigh them up once again,even finish with them ;if she/he tells you a white lie so as not to hurt your feelings and the like,that is another story.

I feel the same way. Like you, I mean everything i say, that's not really a bad thing but the side effect is that, I think everyone eans what they say just as much as I mean my words. Trust is a big thing. Trust if broken is very hard to replace, I for one cannot trust a person easily if they have already betrayed me in the past. Rest assured, your feelings are normal. And besides if you continue with the relationship, it will never be the same again, you would end up in quarrel about a lot of petty things and you will never feel at peace for a long time. I don't think it will still be a healthy relationship.

It's my girl! Yay! I guess I would have to know the lie. If he's been cheating on me I think I would have to leave him. If he's been doing something illegal I imagine I'd have to put a stop to the relationship. I'd like to think I could look at it from all angles, but I'm probably kidding myself. Nothing irks me more than people telling lies.

That would depend on whether the lie actually hurt somebody or not. Some people I know think that withholding the truth is the same as lying. I don't. I would find infidelity unforgivable but I would probably overlook lying about one's age, for example.

I guess it would depend on what the lie was about. If, say, he was keeping somebody else's secret, because he had promised to, I might be able to.

I once dated someone who told me a huge lie and I did forgive him for that. Before I experienced the situation I probably would have said that I wouldn't tolerate a person who lied to me, but when I was in the situation I didn't feel that way. I don't think that it right of him to lie to me, but I do understand that he was afraid that I would reject him if he told me the truth early in the relationship, because he had experienced that in the past and he lied because of fear of rejection. I forgave for that lie and I was able to keep my trust in him, but if I had discovered that he had lied about other things as well I would have ended the relationship because I wouldn't have been able to trust or respect him.

I will forgive her only because of one reason that she is my lover. The person whom I love the most in this world. For her I will do anything,then why cannot I forgive her. I love her so much that I will be forced to agree whatever she says. May be you and everyone will say that I am a "henpecked". But as long as I love her I don't care for anyone other says what.

Hi sarah! Happy new year, and welcome back hockey! I guess trust is the most valuable commodity in a relationship. And the easiest way to loose that commodity is to break that trust. It would be difficult to continue a relationship if that bond is broken. I would have to agree with that!

I have been lied to before and eversince I have zero tolerance for lies and liars. Like you said, I've lost respect for this person and I will always question and doubt everything they say to me. So I wouldn't bother staying with that person anymore. Only those who have experienced such lie and then ended a relationship know how much it hurts but better hurt once than being betrayed forever...

I am not sure. Maybe it depends on the "degree of lie" she will tell me and for how long she has been keeping the truth from me. But I do believe that everyone deserves a second chance. However, if she continues to lie to me after that, then that's it for me. At least I know for myself that I have done my best to save our relationship and there would be no regrets on my part. It s hard to answer these kinds of questions when it has not yet happened to you but at least I think that's what I would do.

no. i do not think that when you have been lied to for how many times... then you would suddenly be told the truth... i guess i might not even believe it to be true already.

I would have a very hard time trusting him after a lie. It would certainly be the beginning of the end right there.

I'm the same way, I don't like it when people lie to me about the big things. I just rather people be honest with me and just go from there. I've had so many people lie to me its ridiculous. But once I get lied to once I can never trust them again. You are right. If my husband lied to me about something really big, I'd want to know what was the reason for it anyways and go based off of that. Just cause he's always been honest with me from the start and if he didn't have a good enough reason for it, then I'd lose all trust in it.

Hiya Sarah, With one I could not forgive for a long time it was just one lie after another which I only got to find out much much later so although now he is forgiven there was no going back because his Family did not tell the truth either I am not including his sisters though they were very different but I was not going to marry them but I missed their company for ages. He has never forgiven me for leaving him but that is on his own head.xxx

It depends on the kind of lie. What is huge to some might not be huge to me. For example if my husband would tell me he once was married or he been in prison I can live with that. Why? Because it was at a time before me, his past. What is important is how he treats me. It's different if he tells me he does have a gf at this moment or just killed someone although I asked him if he did.

It depends on how long they wait and what the lie is. If I can see that they might think I would be upset, then I might forgive them. However, if it's not something that makes sense like that I'll get mad. I hate when people lie, because for the most part I see no reason for it.