Seeking Forgiveness Is Wrong & Selfish

Nice analysis but misses part of the process. Yes, if you wrong someone you should make restitution or at least offer it but the point of seeking forgiveness is connected with the concept of repentance, all tied in with self-knowledge. I would elaborate but am feeling lazy, please forgive me all the best, urban

I'm not entirely sure why you think it is selfish to ask for forgiveness, other than on semantic grounds to give, would suggest it is up to the giver, so I can see what you mean from that perspective...you can't force someone to give you something ...its up to them to want to but to ask forgiveness, as I understand it, suggests, to me at least, not just that one is regretting the wronging of another, but asking forgiveness goes that one step farther...humbling oneself even that much farther to request of the wronged one a pardon so that the relationship may be repaired to the benefit of both parties I think having to ask for anything of someone else is embarassing, like asking for help many people would rather suffer in silence, because it can make you feel humiliated to have to need if someone asks for my pardon, it makes me feel kindness and understanding towards them because I know how hard it can be saying sorry is easy by comparison-but that someone cares enough about my feelings to ask for something like forgiveness from me? just my take on it anyway

I think some of this is semantics, but I can also see where you are coming from. You do need to sincerely ask what you can do to make up for whatever wrong you have done. And then let the matter be. Some people, in seeking forgiveness can become very persistent and kind of like a stalker. Forgiveness is a gift that can be given or bestowed by the person who was wronged. That is why it says "give" in the word "for give"

A person does have the right to withhold forgiveness... If one has done another a wrong, they should apologize and offer restitution. The one wronged does not have to accept the apology or give forgiveness. However, as it is taught in the Torah and the Talmud, The one doing the wrong must apologize up to three times...If the apology is still not accepted, the wrong becomes the sin of the original wronged person. This does not mean that restitution should not be made if material objects or bodily parts were damaged. Restitution is always necessary in these cases.

I like you analogy there. But I for one have never asked for forgiveness, never will. And I never forgive. That is my nature. If someone wrongs me I turn the other way and write them off. They get one chance. Never two. Well, only once I gave a second chance and that was my ex. I knew I never should have given her that option. I gut burned by that one. I will apologize for something I might have said or done, but that is as far as it goes. And if the other person does not want to forgive me, thats cool. I wouldn't expect it any other way.

I think you're right. The victim still needs to feel like the deed has been righted. However, if the person is sincere then their part is done. They just need to back off and wait for the person to decide that all is well.

Within your power, you can ask for forgiveness and you can give forgiveness. It is not within your power to act for another. We all stumble about in our dealings with others, but the most we can do is ask for forgiveness and accept forgiveness when it comes our way. Truth is we can never change the past.

How can forgiveness, whether asked for or not, not be pertinent to the subject? Who do you think is hurt more when apologizes are not accepted and forgiveness not given? It may be the victims call to forgive or not forgive, but can any good come from refusing to forgive? If the idea is to right a wrong, forgiveness must be a part of it along with repentance.

I totally agree with you on this one, when you ask someone to forgive you, then you shouldn't seek for them to forgive you. You apologize and move on. It is up to that person, whether or not they are going to forgive you. When I apologize to someone I don't expect them to forgive me, but I know that I did my part in apologizing and just moving on. I think all people shouldn't seek forgiveness, but when you know you have done wrong, it is best to just apologize whether they forgive you or not.

You are absolutely right. Forgiveness can be given or not given. If you make restitution and apologize, the forgiveness lays within the person receiving the apology. Whether they forgive you is totally up to them. This doesn't mean that you shouldn't go on with your life, at least you did apologize.

sorry, I dont forgive you Rob. But good try. Ha ha ha

It depends, nobody can change what he has done forgiven or not it happened you can never re-write the past, so it was done, so it be written, that's it. Forgiveness is a word of an artist or a devil maybe. People made the same crime again and again for thinking they are already forgiven of the crime they done before. Wrong it was not forgiveness for the scars of what you did marked the person you hurt, only forgot what you've done in the past and maybe he don't want to tolerate so he did not react or retaliate but it is not forgiveness.