Mentally Prepared...
By Jennifer
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
Valdosta, Georgia
January 22, 2013 12:53pm CST
Many things in my life have taken me by surprise. Usually not good things either. Like for one example, my husband's injury last year. We were finally doing well, saving up money, getting ready to move into our own place and I get the call that my husband was hurt badly and on his way to the hospital. It completely took me by surprise, I thought my world was collapsing, I never expected it to happen...Because of his injury all of our savings went to supporting us since he was out of work so long due to his injury.
So many times things like this have happened in our lives. Now instead of waking up each day expecting things to go one way, I wake up expecting something to happen that will catch me off guard. It's not that I am negative or looking for the bad, I just mentally prepare myself the best I can for the absolute worst. I don't like being blind sighted, things hitting out of no where, taking my breath away and making me feel like my world is crumbling around me...
(Just for the record, nothing bad happened lately, I am just in a thinking mood today is all).
8 people like this
15 responses
@Kashmeresmycat (6369)
• United States
22 Jan 13
You know what LMB, it doesn't matter if you wake up ready or not. It still will knock you off your feet when it happens. Been there all my life and you never get used to it. I try to just take everything as best as I can.
2 people like this
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
22 Jan 13
That is true, most likely I will still be off guard with whatever it is but I try to prepare myself even though I know it will probably do no good anyway.
But I feel like if I am expecting it maybe I can handle it better. I don't know, maybe that is a naive way to think...
1 person likes this
@Kashmeresmycat (6369)
• United States
22 Jan 13
Perfect discussion right now. Sorry, didn't get this notification AGAIN from myLot. This is what happened to me just a short while ago. I get this letter in the mail from a collection agency that they're going to take me to court if I don't pay this amount...which is a settlement. See, you just don't expect these things and now I'm pi$$ed off. I just saved $500 to help me move and now I'll probably just throw it to the wind and pay these creeps off already. It still pulls the rug out every single time.
3 people like this
@GardenGerty (160879)
• United States
23 Jan 13
Sometimes those things are bogus. Do not talk to them unless you know that it is genuine Kash. My notifications disappeared around noon yesterday, so I found her next post by looking last night. I know what is coming up here.
1 person likes this
@bounce58 (17385)
• Canada
23 Jan 13
This is why being pessimistic suits me well too. I'd start out expecting the worst in everything, and then when something does turn out right, I'd be pleasantly surprised. I'd rather be mentally 'unprepared' for a surprise and have fun dealing with it than the negative surprises.
I hope that we all get a reprieve from the negative stuff, and just have the pleasant surprises going forward.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
24 Jan 13
but bounce and LMB does that not lead to self fulfilling prophesies as you think the worst will happen and act carelessly and voila the worst happened as you made it happen by being careless and fulfiling the prophesy.
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
24 Jan 13
Yeah I feel like it is the only way to be. You are disappointed a lot less because your expecting it to happen anyway. I hate being more disappointed if I expected good things and only bad came!
@GardenGerty (160879)
• United States
23 Jan 13
I am glad you are in a thinking mood, although we can never be prepared for everything that happens in our life. I know how it is to have your spouse suddenly unable to provide. I am sorry that happened, I have been there myself. Always be prepared but also always accept life with good expectations.
2 people like this
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
24 Jan 13
No I know we can't but I do try anyway... It is really hard, we are behind in everything too and I cannot talk to him about it because then it makes him feel bad. We might be getting our lights shut off, we only have soup to eat, our rent is behind, and I cannot tell him I'm scared because then he feels like a bad father and husband...
Sucks. And now this Danny character has me worried too. I really cannot handle much more I am so serious.
@wilsongoddard (7291)
• United States
23 Jan 13
The way things are structured, one generally does not rise in socioeconomic status in this country. The lower one's socioeconomic status, the more expensive life's "little bumps" will be for you--and the more likely they will be to arise for you. Or, in other words, not having money will cost you more.
2 people like this
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
24 Jan 13
Your absolutely right. I feel like every time we turn around it is something else, it knocks us down so much that it takes us a year or more to get back where we were to begin with. So darn frustrating!
@PointlessQuestions (15397)
• United States
23 Jan 13
Prepare for the worst while hoping for the best. That's the way I have had to go through life, because Murphy's Law always took place in my life.
2 people like this
@GardenGerty (160879)
• United States
23 Jan 13
Since I came upon your other discussion last night at midnight, I understand your "something" that is happening now. I hope it does not turn out the way you anticipate it will and that all the caring words from MyLot will help lift you up in it. You know if we lived close we would be there to surround you in a heartbeat.
2 people like this
@Mavic123456 (21893)
• Thailand
23 Jan 13
now you know the effect of waking up expecting something to happen that will caught you off guard... it is time to shift paradigm so instead of expecting something unfortunate that may happen... think the that something great will happen this day. Let's say winning in the lotto or having more kids for your small business. the more kids the better right, means more income.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
24 Jan 13
hi I think a lot of times positive thinking did pay off for me anmd it sure beat thinking black thoughts as we had good things happen too.
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
24 Jan 13
Has positive thinking made your life better? Has it brought you great things? More money? A better love life? What has positive thinking done for you?
Just curious...
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
23 Jan 13
I don't think so either but I try anyway. At least if I think that something could happen instead of thinking everything will go well I can at least be on guard.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
24 Jan 13
hi LMb beware of self fulfilling prophesy as always expecting the worst can make you careless and actually cause a bad happening. Thinking positively will make you more careful as you want things to go smoothly and they will too.Positive thinking does work but you have to really be positive in order to benefit from it.I had to rethink things as my hubbie when he was alive was a positive thinker.And it worked most of the time too.
1 person likes this
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
24 Jan 13
I honestly don't know how to be positive. I have been negative my entire life and I don't how to change it. I have always been scared to think positively because I feel like I will have more disappointments in my life. I don't need more disappointment...I wish I knew how but after so many years of this thinking, is it possible to change?
@celticeagle (168126)
• Boise, Idaho
23 Jan 13
If life were easy we would all be lazy and stupid. Giving us situations to test our character is a good thing and it even makes life worth living. Thank goodness you had some savings. Alot of people don't. When I am stressed I tend to think the worst. I wish I wouldn't but I sure do. It is good to be prepared but I think there comes a time that you have to let it go. The negative thoughts. I have to really double think myself and really be strong to make those thoughts go away.
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
23 Jan 13
Yeah I guess your right. It was just a really tough time in our lives, one that I hope I never have to relive.
I tend to think the worst as well. It is truly hard to let go of the negative thoughts...
1 person likes this
@JenInTN (27514)
• United States
25 Jan 13
There are people that like to think that we are in total control of our lives but I have had a ton of stuff happen to me that has lead me in entirely different directions than I was initially headed. The one good thing that I can say is that even though it was so hard and terrible at the time, it ends up being for something.
1 person likes this
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
25 Jan 13
I assure you I definitely know I cannot control my life but I do try to prepare myself the best I can for things to come...
Some good came out of my husband's injury, but not most of it...
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
25 Jan 13
I know what you mean, I used to be the kind of person that was a very optimistic person and I've been through a lot of unforeseen circumstances in my life that have really made me think a lot differently than the way that I used to think. This was something that really changed two years ago when we got the call that my husband had cancer. Now we are struggling through life each and every day, but at least he is a lot more healthy now and we will be able to make it through anything, regardless of what kind of curveballs that are thrown our way.
1 person likes this
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
27 Feb 13
Yeah, positive thinking never worked for me. I have always been more of a realistic person, not negative but not with my head in the clouds walking around thinking life is grand either.
Like the other day, when the Social Workers came. I had no idea that was coming! It blind sighted me and when it did I was more pissed than anything. Not only at the person who called with lies but also with myself for not seeing something bad coming my way...
I am glad your husband is more healthy and I hope good things come your family's way.
@allknowing (137553)
• India
24 Jan 13
I am not sure if it is a good thing to expect the worst. I believe in the saying
Cross that bridge when one comes to it How prepared one can be not knowing what the future holds LMB?
@allknowing (137553)
• India
24 Jan 13
Things going wrong is quite normal for all of us. but yet I still do not worry about them. I cannot possibly be prepared for them either. I had a road accident way back in 2006 and that too on Valentine's day. I was returning from a meeting I had with students who I had wanted that they come for a 'Beyond the Class room' workshop I was getting ready to put up with the help of nuns. I was full of hopes but for this I was not prepared. It totally changed my life. Being someone who is capable of finding one's level I am doing fine.
1 person likes this
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
24 Jan 13
Well you cannot really fully prepare but you can at least expect it to happen so it won't be such a shock to you, or not as much anyway...
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
22 Jan 13
It really gets us sometimes to be thinking more of what possible bad things could happen just to be prepared. Nothing wrong about that for as long as we try to figure out how we can overcome such incident rather than get stuck of being afraid and not do or think of something to do about it.
2 people like this
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
23 Jan 13
Yeah I would rather be on guard and expect something to happen. Rather than thinking everything will be fine and something really bad happens.
@intelinsideyou (664)
• India
22 Jan 13
Now that is the purpose of the savings we do to help us in crucial time. There are things in life over which we don't have any control like in case your husband's accident but the good thing is that you already have done enough savings to survive that crucial period of time. Life doesn't go always in a way we expect so a person should always be ready to encounter surprises. So if you are having a great time for a while that doesn't mean it will continue like this as there will be change of fortune. So a clever person will always be prepared for the tough time even if he or she is having a good one. You never know what life holds for you in a future and that is why savings are meant for.
2 people like this
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
23 Jan 13
Yes it did help in that time of our lives. It was a very difficult time for us and it hit us out of no where... Life definitely takes some unexpected turns that is for sure. I try to at least be prepared for it though...
@LovingMyBabies (85288)
• Valdosta, Georgia
25 Jan 13
I know God does have a plan for my life, sometimes it's hard with life to remember that... Thank you for the prayers, they are needed and appreciated. =)