Cant believe my ex.. chose new wife over his own son.....

That is one lousy move on your ex husbands part. It is not a matter of choosing. it is what it is. That is his son and therefore always comes first. Thats how I do it here with my girl friend. She new from the beginning that my kids come first. She accepted that and is fine with it. I will never, ever have my kids call her mom. They have a mother. I agree with you. And I bet you cannot wait to move back there now.

I am a bit confused now. I knew you wanted to be closer to your son and that's why you are moving. But what is the reason your son will they there? A dad that seems to want to have a new start without his son (sounds like my dad). To be honest I think it's useless to have discussions about that. I do believe/think your ex and you both have the right to start a new life. I also agree that children will leave (more frequently earlier as late) but 14 years old is still young to kick out on the street and abandon already. I can only say: I feel sorry for your ex, he is a pathetic person. A person like that is not a good person at all, no matter how he treats his new wife (or new family).

It sure sound like he prefer his new wife over his teenage son. Yes, people change over time and sometime it becoming worse than before. Or may be you have seen the 'real' him this time instead of the 'fake' him all those time you live with him and married to him. Some people are master of deception and play well in love relationship. It must be really shocking to you knowing his new wife has such a strong hold on him instead of his own blood and flesh. Sigh!!

Never ever let him take advantage of you and control matters go ahead and make strong moves which will iterate your value and prove to be quite decisible for sure or else you might be left behind

That's really sad that he's treating your son that way. It doesn't surprise me as a lot of people when they marry someone new the kids get pushed aside. Its wrong and it should not be that way... I feel bad for your son. But I'm glad heswith your dad who loves him.

That is just horrible, this is the time in your sons life when he needs him the most. It's good that your sister and dad can care for him until you get there.

Just because you have a child doesn't mean your a parent. It seems like your ex has no parenting skills and leaves it all up to you or family. I'm happy your Dad and sister have taken your son it. He will have a bette life for it. I bet your looking forward to August!

You have a good decision that you have move on. Your ex husband will not love you anymore. Well, you have to enjoy your life as the single mother. I know you have earnings for yourself. Just take care of your son if you have him.

Wow. (shakes head)

Well that means he will be in good hands till you get there. That is great. It also shows that your ex does not really care about his son and his feelings which is devastating to me. Now your son will think alot less of him and won't have his father in his life. Hopefully your dad can give him the male bonding he will need to grow up to be a good man and nothing like his dad.

Um... how does he figure that he doesn't have to chose between his wife and your son when he's obviously already made his choice? Poor kid... it's good that you have family near him who are willing to look after him until you're able to get back to the U.S. His dad sounds like a real winner. I guess there's a very good reason he's your ex, huh?

You, your ex & your son are a broken automobile. Your ex (to you) is a busted engine, while you & your son are parts that are working fine (except they are connected to the unrepairable engine). You need a new engine. I'm sure you TRIED to fix the old one (Christsakes, you were MARRIED TO IT; 'fixing it' was part of your job!), but now you've tossed it out and someone else picked it up and put it in their vehicle; and it's working fine for them! Your son is a 'spare-part' too---even more-spare, as either machine will work without him. Sad that you can't think of your- and your ex's new wife's-machine as one & the same ... or can you? Let's assume for now that you can't, that your machine is no-good without IT'S OWN engine---well, go out and GIT you a new engine! a man who can provide you & your son with what you need (while you provide for him or while he provides for himself as well).

ohhh so sad.. that's the reality now.. so life must go on

Maria I'm so sorry to hear that! How any father can be so uncaring for their son, I'll never know. It must hurt you so much as his mom to know your son's father won't put him first. I'm happy to hear that you're moving back and will be living with your son, though. I don't know your story because I'm new here, but it sounds like living with you is the best thing for your son... with a parent who loves him above all else, that is what he needs and deserves. In the end Maria, it will be your ex who loses out if this leads to a difficult or distant relationship with his son. I just hope your son can handle all of this emotionally, he is still young after all.

At least, he had somewhere else to go. He will be much better off with his grandfather and aunt than being trapped in a house of misery with his father and that controlling creature. It will be good when you are there this summer, though. Then, your son will be back with a loving parent.

Maria, I am really sorry for what happened. I am not sure I would ever fall for a guy like such who can throw out his own son ( in guise of he left home himself). He may not be a good husband but how can a guy not love the life he brought to this earth. 14 is no age to be responsible and that is why father is needed a lot. I am sure your parents would take care of your son real good but incidents like this does leave a bad taste in mouth.

Oh that's awful, I can understand that his is a honeymoon stage with his new wife but to let his son go out from his house without even talking or resolving this issue is absurd. He's the father, at least he should try to explain things to his son.

well, it's better that you left your son to your dad and sister than left him with your ex. as what you had said, he had changed worse than before so just be thankful that he chose his new wife over your son coz you'll never know what else he can do to your son specially that your not there.

I think that your exes behavior is deplorable. It seems he was looking for a way out of parenting anyway. Your son was there before this new wife so the choice should've been simple. I believe that the stepmom was overstepping her boundaries. A mother is as a mother does. If your son wasn't comfortable with calling her mom then his dad should've told his wife to leave your son alone and let him do things on his own time. It is great that your own family was around. Your son looks like he is better off with you and your family. Best wishes to you and your son!!!

Sounds like you made the right choice to leave him. Not caring about his own son, that's pretty terrible.