Is it inherent for girls to seek special sweetness?
By subterfuge54
@subterfuge54 (207)
Philippines
February 11, 2013 8:14am CST
I always knew that he wasn't the sweet guy even before we got into a relationship, my first. I thought I also didn't have a knack for sweet stuff like my boyfriend giving me flowers or chocolates. When he was still courting me, he never did that. I thought I'd be fine with it.
But as time pass by, I can't help but yearn for that. I find myself wishing that he'd persistently check on me when I'm away or when I get sick. I keep wondering what it would be like for him to treat me in a special dinner out of the blue or surprise me. I have this feeling that I'm just a last priority.
Is it selfish to ask for that since it is not his nature? Am I not that understanding?
1 person likes this
4 responses
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
12 Feb 13
I have also wished to be treated just like a princess. However, my husband isn't the kind of man who would be always that sweet. The first few years, I would feel disappointed. But then I realized, it is impossible to impose on him coz he grew up seeing his father not as sweet to his mother. So, I understood.
@subterfuge54 (207)
• Philippines
13 Feb 13
My boyfriend had some problems too in his home. That is also why he is not that sweet to me. How did you come to accept it? How do you know then that he loves you and he's not taking you for granted?
@subterfuge54 (207)
• Philippines
13 Feb 13
You're still lucky you get to have a glimpse of his sweetness though. He really loves you. As for me, he even does not even spend most of his days with me. I want him to be the one who will invite me to spend time together just to know that he wants to spend time with me. He does not even have the initiative to give me gifts. He just give in Christmas time and my birthday. We're not even married yet.
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
13 Feb 13
Well, actually, he was not like that when we were still not married. And I know that he loves me that much coz there was not a single day in a week that we did not see each other. I never demanded to give me his time. He just wants to spend most of his time with me, even during Sundays, where he comes to church with us. He would give presents not only to me but as well to my parents and siblings and nanny. However, when we got married, things kinda changed. Although it would be nice to be having that sweetness again, but I guess coz we struggle to make ends meet, that part suffered. And it has gotten to the point of not even greeting me on certain occasions. Well, it still hurts sometimes, but it is something that I have learned to live with. I just realized that not all people could remain who they are because of several factors.
@sonusd (1547)
• India
13 Feb 13
There is nothing selfishness for seeking some special treatment from some one you love.
But please try to understand his situation also may be he is busy in something so cant give you enough time but if he has changed his nature from previous then you better do not expect anything from him. Try to keep your self busy and do not compare what other guys are doing which will hurt you.
@subterfuge54 (207)
• Philippines
14 Feb 13
Thanks for saying that it is not selfishness. I kinda felt guilty feeling this way because I understand why he is not that sweet. There is just a part of me wanting that kind of treatment. I guess I am still in the process of accepting what I understood.
@WakeUpKitty (8694)
• Netherlands
11 Feb 13
Sounds to me he is not giving you much attention, according to your feelings. Might be a good idea to find out if he Always been like that or he did chance and takes you for granted now. Might be he Always been that way but you just never noticed at the start.. way too much in love (blind) to notice.
@subterfuge54 (207)
• Philippines
11 Feb 13
Oh my! you have a point! Since he is my first love, I might have been too much in love to see it. Thanks so much! :)
@Angelpink (4034)
• Philippines
11 Feb 13
Hello there ! It is but natural for us girls to seek for some sweetness because we girls are born romantics except for few maybe . Roses and chocolates are enough for us to make us happy but the problem is not all boys who are like us romantic , sweet and thoughtful . There are boys who are not fond of giving something to a girl . They don't mind this kind of gesture . Some feels awkward about it , some intentionally don't have such kind of gesture but there are some also who valued their girl so much that they wanted their girl to be happy. Lucky is the girl who will fall in the thoughtful , romantic guy. Her day will be complete upon receiving those but those who are bit unlucky , will just feel envy and insecure asking self , why some received something and she nothing when in fact she is also young and beautiful.
@subterfuge54 (207)
• Philippines
11 Feb 13
Yeah! you're right. I kinda felt jealous seeing other girls receive special attention from their heartmates especially during valentines. I guess I fell for the wrong one, thinking he'll change someday.
