from partner to carer..

helping someone - helping someone
February 21, 2013 5:28am CST
As my previous post stated, my lovely partner had to have an operation to remove her appendix mid-January. As we live together, I became her carer for 2 weeks while she recuperated. I took 3 days off work, as he operation was on a Thursday, so I took the Friday off to sit in the hospital with her, and then take her home that night, meaning I could look after her Saturday, and Sunday, and then off work Monday and Tuesday. I couldn’t afford to take more time off, but it meant the first 5 days I was there. It was really hard going! Having to do everything I normally do round the house, everything she normally does round the house, plus having to actually look after and care for her as well. She needed help with everything! getting up, lying down, making food, even going to the bathroom or getting washed. She could hardly brush her own teeth she was in that much pain. Have you ever been in that position? Are you someone’s career? I have never ever been in this position before. I have cared for people when they have been unwell, but only like flu’s and colds, never an operation, and never where someone becomes utterly immobile. Apparently the surgery is very common, although I have only met a handful of people that have ever had their appendix out. She is recovering well, and has been up and about for 2 weeks now :) What do you think of this?
3 people like this
7 responses
@ElicBxn (63638)
• United States
9 May 16
I did home health for 5 years and while the person could do many things on her own, there were a lot of things she couldn't (or wouldn't.)
@keihimekawa (2009)
• Philippines
22 Feb 13
It's great to hear that your partner's getting well. She should be since she has you as her care taker :P Anyway, going back to the topic... I can totally relate to what you're saying. My mom underwent a gallbladder removal surgery as as soon as she woke up from her sleep, she didn't feel well and constantly throws up because of the medicines used during her operation (the doctor said this is common since she needs to remove the medicine from her body). The refuses to eat but I have to make sure she takes in soup (the least) to fill her stomach. Since she can't get up for a day or so, I have to use the bedpan whenever she wants to "go". Of course, I end up cleaning the pan after. What I find to be most difficult is when she wakes up in the middle of the night. I have to stay awake or if I'm sleeping, I have to wake up immediately since she can't talk much. It's very difficult since you get too little sleep and you have to be alert to what the doctor would say especially if it's about medicines and what food the patient can take in, etc.
@carmelanirel (20942)
• United States
21 Feb 13
I am happy that she had recovered. I replied to your post with my own story and you know what? Even after having 4 children, my tubes tied, and my appendix taken out, and another corrective surgery I had, altogether my husband has spent maybe a week as my care giver. This is because I heal up really quick or I have really good surgeons. For example, remember how I said I had my appendix taken out at 3 AM? By 4 that afternoon I was on my way home. I still did light housework, though it didn't help that my daughters very light (about 5 pounds) cat who NEVER wants to be around people, somehow wanted to jump right onto my stomach where the stitches were. If I wasn't recuperating, I would have enjoyed the rarity, but since she landed there, I quickly picked her up and placed her on the floor. As for being a care giver, yes..I have off and on since my husband hurt his back and sometimes it get annoying, especially when I have school work I have to do. But it isn't constant, like he will be good for a few days and then come home with his back hurting so bad, I have to work on it, or in the mornings when his muscles are stiff.
@Sreekala (34312)
• India
21 Feb 13
I understand the difficulty of yours as you had to do each and every work at home and take care of your partner. I had in that position two times in my life. Our son was small and I had to care my hubby and son and do all the works at home too. Two times he underwent surgery related with accident. (we are staying far away from our native place) I had taken off from my work. It was tough time indeed, thankfully I over come those. Wishing a speedy recovery to your partner.
@wongchoiyee (7413)
• Malaysia
21 Feb 13
I hope she is well enough to have fun soon, having tired and restless is always after operation, god bless. You are a good partner.
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
21 Feb 13
Beinv a wife and mother, I am expected to take care every menber if the family most espevially when one is sick. I remember ine incudent when my husband was sick and could barely move, i got stung by a bee and I had anapgylactic shock. I know tgat he wohkd have brought me to the hosputal hinself but he couldn't. Good thing his brother in lae was home for a shirt vacation and so he and my son tooj me to the hospitak. I onlysoent 3 hors.there and when i git back, still took care of him
• Philippines
21 Feb 13
Congratulations for loving and serving your partner you prove your worth to her, keep it up.