Is it possible for a man to become faithful from being womanizer?
By chicgale
@chicgale (2982)
Philippines
February 22, 2013 8:16pm CST
I was talking to my bf's close friend and he was telling me how womanizer my bf was before. I asked my bf about this and he said that yes he was a womanizer but not anymore coz he wants to focus on his life and work and plus he was younger then that time.
I am beginning to get scared now if he is really the one for me. Yes, I am carrying with his child right now, but I am really scared now. I am afraid that I will get hurt someday if he'll cheat. He cheated on his previous girlfriends before, so I am thinking on how much more to me someday? Is it just me, or am I just too paranoid about it? I love him, but I don't trust him enough. I just don't know why. I am afraid to marry him someday. UGH!
So, is it really possible for a man to become faithful from being womanizer? Do you know any man who was a womanizer and became faithful?
1 person likes this
18 responses
@arreolabryan (856)
• Philippines
23 Feb 13
if the person find his true happiness he would not be a womanizer anymore
2 people like this
@KOSTAS499 (1624)
• Greece
23 Feb 13
If he is TOO crazy about women, nothing can save him.
Some men change after they badly fall in love with someone...
2 people like this
@kprofgames (3091)
• United States
23 Feb 13
Yes they can. As you said he life has changed focus. In short, he grew up. Women do the same as well. It isn't all men that womanizers...there are a few man eaters out there too, but yes a person that had a colorful lifestyle can change.
Can understand your concerns, it's just not the two of you anymore to think about but If you constantly worry about it and it puts your trust in danger then you are just driving yourself crazy for no reason.
So question....was there any doubt of him being faithful to you before? If there wasn't then I wouldn't create a problem that isn't there.
Congratulations to you both on your expected little bundle of joy!
1 person likes this
@chicgale (2982)
• Philippines
23 Feb 13
Thank you so much!!!
No, he never cheat on me yet. I guess you are right that I don't need to worry too much about it. Maybe his close friend and some of my friends are right also that he might change coz he will become a father soon, and I know how he love kids.
@savire (204)
• Indonesia
26 Feb 13
Well In my own experience I do have male friend which you could call a jerk because He keep womanizing all the time. But recently once he decided to marry and they had a child now I see that He really care about his wife and his child.
So I think there's no reason to be afraid of this. As long as you two had the same goal in life thing like that won't happen. Just make sure that what you guys both targeting in near 5 years at least the same. Because troubles might raised if one sides is dissatisfied with what the other expect in them. But in matures couples thing like that should be less.
@choconut (297)
• Philippines
26 Feb 13
did he ever cheat on you when you two are together? if not, then no need to worry. I have a friend who's also a womanizer before but when he met the ONE, he became faithful and loyal, so for your question: yes they can change.
Also, I'd like to add, if you love a person, past doesn't matter much anymore, what matters is your present and your future, you just have to accept his past and move on, its normal to get scared its human thing, but you have to overcome this or else you'll never be happy. Stop stressing yourself its bad for the baby. Enjoy your pregnancy with the man you love God bless.
1 person likes this
@jearl02 (211)
• Philippines
28 Feb 13
I believe it is possible for as long as he wants to. And I believe he will want to be faithful if he continues to see the signs that you are worth loving and deserving of his love. So, don't worry that much. Just be a good girl and prove to him that you are deserving to be loved. However, it is also good that you have known that part of his past, it will prepare you if in case he will change.
1 person likes this
@jonastabuena (2307)
• Philippines
25 Feb 13
Yes it is possible, and its good to know that your bf changed for the better, i think you don't have to be scared about his past, past is past, and think positive. I guess if you really love the person you will accept the whole him, his failures, his past, his attitude and so on. Don't judge him by his past, you know people change as time goes by, and there is always a reason why a man/woman cheats to his/her partner.
1 person likes this
@chiyosan (30184)
• Philippines
25 Feb 13
Has he shown any signs to you that he is different from the kind of person everybody knew him before?
I am speaking for my experience alone and those that i am close with, so please do not relate this to your bf and i think everyone deserves second chances, only you will know him thoroughly, not us and not when you generalize "men" or women.
So with me, My ex cheated on his ex girlfriend, they were still together and his press release was they have broken up already. I have thought that we were doing great, he was cool and all and no traces of him being a womanizer, but well apparently instincts confirmed after i caught him cheating on me. so he has not changed ( after all i felt as though there was no one else, we were even talking about getting married!)
A friend of mine (guy) was cheating on his girlfriend and had another woman, this other woman knew he already has a girlfriend, but he fell for her and left his girlfriend. they are now married with two kids - and so far he has changed. He is a family man now and is very responsible.
Another one is a friend (girl) who has a bf, this bf is a womanizer and well we thought he will change for her - but never did. he cheated on her while they where bf-gf , but she forgave him and told him not too do it again, but he did so even if they had gotten married, she even caught him on websites and was chatting with women and all. they had separated for about 6 months and i think she was persuaded to get back with him for the sake of their daughter... But then that sure did not stop him still and up until now he still is into womanizing... (but my friend kept on forgiving him every time so this guy never learns and abuses my friend!)
The thing is, do not think of him and what HE COULD do. he hasn't done it yet so do not fear for that. If he is like that and has not changed, be careful not to let your emotions get into your reasoning. OF course you have got to decide and know that what you need to do, be firm and do not let this guy get away with what he has done.
As for now, give him the chance to be the best person to you, you are pregnant with his baby and at least give him the chance to be a better person for you... and of course do let him know that if he messes up, you will be done and will not return (so he better think first before he thinks of cheating on you).
1 person likes this
@chicgale (2982)
• Philippines
25 Feb 13
Thank you so much for sharing chiyosan!
Actually, our story was, he cheated on his ex GF who was working abroad and I was the reason why they broke up coz I was the other woman. Yes, I knew that he had a girlfriend and he let me believed that they had misunderstandings or something and she kept breaking up with him coz she always get jealous. So, when they broke up, our relationship was very smooth even though our relationship was a secret or was not public coz his ex and him has common friends, and their friends kept bothering our relationship, so he denied me to them! He told them that I am not his girlfriend at all. I was hurt about that but he explained it to me the reason why he denied me to them coz he didn't wanna have trouble with his friends and he didn't want his ex and their friends to hate them for having a bad reputation. For me, I didn't get it but I just let him do it coz I love him and I can feel that he love me also. So, right now that we knew and some of our friends knew that I am pregnant, he told me that he will not deny it anymore. We'll see. But, he was very happy and excited when he found out that I am carrying his baby. He even cried when he called his sister abroad to tell her the news. He is working as a seafarer right now, so we won't be together for the whole pregnancy. So, I am just hoping that things will be alright when the baby is born and I am always praying that he won't deny me from his friends anymore.
@Archie0 (5652)
•
23 Feb 13
I think you are thinking too much. What you need to think is see that he hasn't left you alone when he comes to know you are carrying his child. Also he agreed that he was a womanizer before and not now. So you see he has changed, and every person has rights to be given one chance. Don't think if he is going to leave you or not. Just see that right now you are secure with him. Marry him, if he is carrying a good job. I am sure marriage and the child and you should make things better if not now as per you.
@Aja103654 (5646)
• Philippines
23 Feb 13
Well, at least he didn't deny it. he sounded like he really has changed and matured.
So you became his girlfriend without knowing about his past???
And you already have a baby that is his, so you can't turn back now.
I think though that it is possible for a womanizer to become faithful to one woman once he has matured and learned the important matters about life. Don't let your paranoia ruin what is between the both of you now.
Just do your best in your relationship, establish trust. Don't accuse him or be too paranoid. Do what is right, always.
1 person likes this
@Angelpink (4034)
• Philippines
23 Feb 13
Hi Chic ! Nothing is permanent in this world but change ! Yes that womanizer change into being faithful . Sometimes it is also a phase in man's life that he becomes so addicted to different women around but time will come that he will be done with it and will come to a decision that enough would be enough . Give him a chance , don't judge him through his past. We all have our stupid moments ! Meanwhile you take good care of that angel in your womb , that will be the one to motivate and inspire your bf to be better in life and to work hard and because you are pregnant all system changes therefore many tantrums you will be experiencing. Don't entertain those thoughts that will be visiting you every now and then , it will add to mood swings but rather enjoy things that you want now , eat properly and have an adequate rest. Be happy..
1 person likes this
@yugocean (9963)
• India
23 Feb 13
I don't have any experience with girls, but when your bf is telling you honestly, then there is nothing to be afraid, if he could be a cheater for all life, then possibly he didn't told you about his previous life's wrong. Now for future, you have to take care, unless your bf don't cheat more, now you must not keep this hurting on your heart, but prepare for your and your child's future.
1 person likes this
@binaybbsr1 (375)
• India
23 Feb 13
its better not to go for past life of your bf. I doubt whether the man who told bout your bf is really his best friend or not. Moreover sometimes, we equate some of the past failure love episodes with womanizer like term. And i believe, if you are straight to your love and affection with your bf, your future life is bright. Dont trust to that man at all and keep a distance from him, if your relation break too. That man is not trustworthy at least. Be sure you have found a man(your bf), who is not impotent at least, he may not be obedient, but faithful to you. Just love him like before. Thank you.
1 person likes this
@mondaylover (183)
• Poland
23 Feb 13
If I get your post right you are pregnant, right? This is very bad time to make decisions since your gonna have mood swings and you'll feel insecure. Just wait for now. See if you boyfriend will be a good and responsible father to your child.
It's not impossible to become a good man after being womanizer in the past. He was very young back then and he matured now. Even men have to grow up someday and having a child is great oportunity to do that. If he didn't change by now he would probably left you when he found out about your pregnacy. Don't worry too much.
@chicgale (2982)
• Philippines
23 Feb 13
Thanks so much mondayelover! Yes, I am pregnant right now, and you are right that I have mood swings. Ok, I won't make any decisions for now and I will just hope that everything in our relationship will be OK and happy. And I do hope that he will change but so far he never cheated on me yet. So, thanks for your nice comment and I will not worry about it for now.
@lampar (7584)
• United States
23 Feb 13
I guess if your definition of 'faithful' means that he will tell you the truth every time you ask a question, then i think he can still become faithful from being a womanizer, if you means he will not cheat on you with other women behind your back forever after marry, then i have reservation on that, there is probably only a small percentage of men out there can do that. For your information, I don't know any man who was a womanizer and become faithful to his wife yet, except men who declared faithful to his pastor and religion.
1 person likes this
@machatago (385)
• Philippines
25 Feb 13
Yes of course people can change over time. When we were younger, I know not only men are known for doing crazy things, even girls too. But as time passes by, we grow more mature especially if he can see that you accept him for who he is and for who he was. Even the most gruesome people can change, if they put their heart and soul in setting their lives right. And if he really loves you, he will stay faithful to you no matter what.
1 person likes this
@andy77e (5156)
• United States
25 Feb 13
Well... This is a super tough one. There is no two ways about it.
However there is a simple answer. If you can not trust him now.... I PROMISE you will not trust him in marriage.
If you can *NOT* trust him in marriage, your marriage is doomed from the start.
So here's the simple solution. If you can't trust him... move on. Leave. Ditch him.
Now some men can become faithful. That does happen.
However.... you said he cheated on his girlfriend?
That to me is a bad sign. If a man has NO PROBLEM cheating on a GIRLFRIEND before he is even married...........
Hello? He isn't going to have any problem cheating in marriage.
My advice? This guy is a loser. Ditch him. You marry this twit, and he'll cheat on you for sure.
If he can't handle just having a girlfriend, he sure can't handle being married. Ditch this twit. Let him cheat on some other stupid girl.
1 person likes this
@sender621 (14894)
• United States
23 Feb 13
I believe that everyone has the ability to change their lives. Just because a man had been a womanizer in the past does not mean he can not be faithful to another woman in a relationship. It is not fair to judge someone on their past mistakes. Everyone should be given the chance to prove their real worth and show the world they can change no matter what had come before.