his SWEETNESS stinks
By AR Dianon
@dianon_ice14 (461)
Philippines
February 25, 2013 10:37pm CST
"one of the boys" as they say I am. I easily get along with most of the boys than girls. I am comfortable spending time with them and I like their nature as being spontaneous, limitless and hilarious.
I have this GUY friend whom I know since college and I consider him as one of my most trusted friend, like I tell him most of my whereabouts and problems and craziness. Ive known him for almost 10 years now we remained GOOD friends.
I am aware about his feelings on me, because he's been very vocal about it and he often says that he is waiting for me. We have our own relationships but he remained that way. So, I thought that he is just fooling around saying it.
BUT just recently, he exerts SUPER EXTRA SWEETNESS with sometimes annoys me. HE oftens send messages that he misses me like every 10 minutes "LITERALLY SPEAKING"
1 person likes this
11 responses
@buddha3 (1026)
• India
26 Feb 13
Well, this is so complicated. I've come across this situation myself in my own life. It is still confusing to me, both the behaviour of the boy and the girl in this context. No offense to you, but when he has been saying it and you've been knowing the fact that he is interested in you, why did you still continue being with him as closely as you were before? I think the moment you came to know this, you should've kept some distance from him. It's just my view, so please don't mind :)
Similarly, your friend is also wrong. When he knows that you are in a relationship and you are serious about it, he must never even think of dating you. It's really unethical.
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@buddha3 (1026)
• India
27 Feb 13
hmmm...That's perfect from your side. You also mentioned that you sometimes avoid replying to his messages so that he knows what you feel. That's good.
But does your boyfriend know about this? Have you told him? Hasn't he raised his objection to your friend's behaviour?
I'm just wondering what step you would take regarding your friend, if you know that your boyfriend doesn't like this and feels insecured?!
@dianon_ice14 (461)
• Philippines
26 Feb 13
Yes, I get your point... It's just that I see no enough reason for me to decide not to make friends with him. Yes, he's been very vocal with his feelings but I can see that he respects what I have right now (relationship) and he does nothing to make things complicated. He just want me to feel that I am special to him.... HE says.. I just often remind him that he should not do anything that would trigger me to stop our friendship =)
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@kourdapya (924)
• Philippines
26 Feb 13
So how do you feel about him? Do you like him? Do you see him as a boyfriend potential?
@dianon_ice14 (461)
• Philippines
26 Feb 13
HMMMMMMM.....He is but I don't see myself being with him.. I mean as a boyfriend.
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@alberello (4752)
• Italy
26 Feb 13
Well, I'm happy for you that you have maintained good relationships and good friendships with young boys. However, you have to wait before or after any of them will do the proposed of engagement, this depends on you, if you feel like you either accept or refuse for the moment. However, trying to maintain good relations with those who "love" you.l
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@thegreenbunny (214)
• Italy
26 Feb 13
To be honest, I can't stand this kind of boys. By saying this I don't mean that I like rude ones or things like that, it's only that I hate excessive " male sweetness"! It's ok if a boy you like shows you his love and will to stay with you...but sending messages every ten minutes sounds a bit like stalking!
Maybe, just beacause you're good friend anyway, you should sit and talk with him about this aspect; if he's really a good friend for you he'll stop acting like this due to the fear of losing you.
Tell him exactly how annoying he's become and how mad this is driving you, I'm sure he will understand!
Good luck, hun! :)
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@dianon_ice14 (461)
• Philippines
26 Feb 13
Thank you for your advice. I tried that one too,, he followed but after a few weeks he went back to the same thing he does...hahahaha
I just sometimes avoid to reply on his messages just to let him know how I feel indirectly =)
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@Raine38 (12250)
• United States
26 Feb 13
Do you return his feelings? If not, it will not be fair to him to drag him along and give him a hint of hope no matter how subtle it may be. Gently refuse him, and be ready that the rejection may cause you your friendship with him. On his part, I don't think he's really there for you as a friend seeing as he's got ulterior motives.
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@dianon_ice14 (461)
• Philippines
26 Feb 13
NO I don't... but my treatment NEVER CHANGE,... we always hang out and talk and just have fun... BUT I am very clear that I don't want to have intimate relationship with him.
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@blackrusty (3519)
• Mexico
26 Feb 13
sound like you don't share the same feelings as him and or not as of yet any way if it does bother you then you need to get him aside and sit him down and have that talk again it is ok to use words like i love you like your my brother but for the time your not feeling the kind of love like he is good luck with this be safe and be well
@MoonGypsy (4606)
• United States
26 Feb 13
i think you should cut ties off with this one. either that, or tell him that you are starting to feel weird about his come ons. he shouldn't be doing it when he knows that the both of you are in a relationship with other people.
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@machatago (385)
• Philippines
27 Feb 13
Hmmmm... I have a feeling I've read this before from you. You must be really confused and into this guy friend. I understand you, since he has shown extra sweetness to you. I think you better weigh in your feelings first, remember you have a boyfriend already.
@jenny1015 (13366)
• Philippines
26 Feb 13
Friends do sometimes develop into another relationship. However, sometimes, one one could be feeling that way. And I guess, it is just similar to your situation.
If both of you are committed, then you must remind him that. You wouldn't want to destroy two relationships just for the sake of having your own relationship with him, right? Just tell you friend that he needs to control his feelings coz if not, it will surely be in the way of your friendship.
I have had 2 close guy friends before. Both of them courted me and became my short-lived boyfriends. And I think the reason why it was both short-lived, is because I really just find them as good friends.
1 person likes this
@melvinvinz (60)
• Philippines
26 Feb 13
that's sweet, you should be thankful that he acts that way. But if you don't like him to be your boyfriend his actions would result into some awkwardness between the two of you.
1 person likes this
@cttolledo (5454)
• Legaspi, Philippines
26 Feb 13
Hi.. Well it must be love..why not? as you said you know him for along time, Is there any problem if he court you?
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